You might have wondered what life after death is like but have you ever considered what life is like for those who spend their days with the dead? This Halloween, while so many people are talking about ghouls and ghosts, BK introduces you to the people whose jobs involve meeting real dead bodies every day.

Dead job #1

Burn after praying

Tri Kulchart, 40-year-old mortician at Hualampong Temple. For over ten years Tri has been caring for and preparing the bodies that come to the temple ready for their cremation.

How did you start doing this job? I used to be a street vendor before I got a job as a construction worker at Hualampong temple. Then my brother said, “Why don’t you stay at the temple?” I’d always felt like the outside world was too fussy anyway, so I just gave it a try. I have now been at the temple since 1998.
What was seeing your first body like? The first bodies were tough but you eventually get used to it.
What’s your general routine with the body? I clean, dress and then put the bodies into the coffin and then sleep with the coffin at night. Then I lead the prayer at the ceremony until the cremation, before collecting the bones and ashes for the relatives. In some cases, I also go out to bring the bodies back to the temple. The worst cases are the ones that have been hit by cars. They come in piece by piece.
What are people reactions to what you do for a living? It really depends but most are fine with it. They just always ask, “Don’t you feel afraid?” I don’t.
How much do you earn? It depends on what the relatives give me. We receive no official salary.
Do you believe in ghosts or spirits? Yes. Normally, I am not afraid of the bodies that come to the temple, but I get scared if I knew the person when they were alive.
Any supernatural experiences? Yes. I recently saw the spirit of a guy I knew. He was stabbed to death. I saw his spirit walking around the temple where he used to live. I thought it was odd that he was still around. Then I went to the hospital and found that no-one had taken his body home yet. So I contacted his family to come and get him and I didn’t see his spirit again.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? Yes. 12-years of working here and I now see death as natural. I have also realized that you don’t need to chase things for a happy, simple life.
Philosophy? Do the best to send them off peacefully.

Dead job #2

Searching for Truth

Pol. Maj. Napapat Nattasumon, 31, is the forensic medical doctor at the Institute of Forensic Medicine, Police General Hospital where she examines bodies to discover the real cause of death.

How did you start doing this job? I chose to become a forensic doctor because I loved to watch crime investigation movies. I was so fascinated by the way they searched for the truth. While others were scared watching horror movies, I was like studying it, thinking why was the blood there? How they did make it look that real? Why did the bodies look like that? So I studied medicine first and then later on I started working at the Police Hospital where I requested a scholarship to study forensic science for three years.
What was seeing your first body like? My first was at the Forensics Museum at Siriraj University while studying at medical school. I was kind of freaked out early on that this was what I had to deal with, but things changed after I began doing meditation. I started to understand how things really were.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? They’re curious about how I can work with dead bodies.
How much do you earn? That depends on our police ranks. Now I get B17,000 plus professional fees and public servant welfare.
What’s your general routine when you receive the body? First of all, I have to check what bodies are waiting to have an autopsy. There are normally about 15 bodies a day split between two of us. Our job is to track down the true cause of death by carrying out a thorough medical examination. Then we tell the relatives and the police what exactly happened to the body. Sometimes, we will go out to check the body at the crime scene if the police ask us. In my team, we also spend time in the southern provinces due to the high number of deaths down there.
Do you believe in ghosts or spirits? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? Well maybe. I am not sure if it was truly supernatural or not but there was one case where the relatives didn’t want us to perform an autopsy. I prayed to the body of the dead man and told him that if he wanted his family to find out what made him die, please convince them to let me perform the autopsy. Out of nowhere, his relatives gave me the green light. I found that the cause of death was bleeding in the stomach, a genetic condition that could have killed all his relatives if it had gone undiscovered.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? After seeing lots of causes of death, I have prepared myself for death and made sure that there will be no burdens for my family.
Philosophy? Bringing justice to the dead because they can’t speak.

Dead job #3

Guardian Angel

As ICU nurse manager at Samitivej Hospital, Nitorn Washirasawass, 39 is on the front line of the struggle between life and death and the first person to help relatives with the grieving process.

How did you start doing this job? I had a girly dream to become a nurse after watching lots of movies where nurses save the patient’s lives. That impressed me. I studied nursing at Chiang Mai University before deciding to become a nurse in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) in 1993. I felt I could use my knowledge best in this unit.
What’s your general routine with the body? I usually deal with the patients, but after they pass away, the most important people are their relatives. We will ask them what they want to do with the body and we will help them organize that. We will do everything possible to honor the dead and their memory […in tears]. I never let my tears fall in front of the patients or their relatives though. We have to be strong when they are in sorrow. They need someone to soothe them and make them feel better.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? They ask me why I don’t choose another unit that doesn’t have so many critical patients or deaths.
How much do you earn? Depends on your experience and level and the hospital.
Do you believe in spirits or ghosts? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? No.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? It’s made me appreciate that it’s a natural thing.
Philosophy? Make every minute of your life worthwhile and valuable while you’re still alive.

Dead job #4

Real-life CSI

Pol. Capt. Saralnuch Choo-klin (right), 28, and Pol. Lt. Sommhai Saengkaew, 28, are both scientists (Level 1) at the Crime Scene Investigation Sub Division of the Royal Thai Police. It’s their job to visit crime and accident scenes and pick up valuable evidence to help solve the case.

How did you start doing this job? We both graduated in science from university with the hope of working in the industrial sector, but we heard that the Royal Thai Police were recruiting scientists. We decided to take the test and after studying for two years, we became part of the Crime Scene Investigation Division.
What was seeing your first body like?
Saralnuch: Because you spend two years studying existing cases where you see lots of pictures of bodies, I actually handled it better than expected.
Sommhai: Yes, I was also already prepared for it.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do?
Saralnuch: They seem a little afraid of what we’re doing.
Sommhai: Some people ask us, “Are you really a CSI officer?” Because of our girly looks.
What’s your general routine with the body? Collecting evidence on and around the body, fingerprints, blood samples or any other on-scene evidence. The witnesses might change their testimony in court so we need solid evidence in a murder or robbery case. For cases of fires, we have to find if it was on purpose or an accident.
How much do you earn? Depends on your police rank.
Do you believe in ghosts or spirits? Yes.
Supernatural experiences? Never.
Has it changed your attitude towards death?
Saralnuch: I’m more alert about what I am doing.
Sommhai: Yes, I am more cautious in my everyday life.
Philosophy? Giving justice for the dead people.

Dead job #5

Real life Hero

As a rescue volunteer at the Ruamkatanyu Foundation, Anyawuth Poampai, 37, is usually one of the first on the scene of motoring accidents.

How did you start doing this job? I used to be a waen boy racing my motorcycle around. One day, I was 15, I went to drink with friends and on the way home I came across a female driver who had hit an old man. She was in shock and didn’t know what to do, while the old guy lay on the road bleeding. I parked my moto and asked her “Why don’t you help him?” and she just said, “I can’t move.” I ended up driving the old man to the hospital in her car even though I didn’t know how to drive, she had to guide me. At the hospital, the old man’s relatives were so thankful for what I had done. At that moment, I decided I wanted to be a rescue volunteer and I have now been doing it since 1989. I am now part of a permanent rescue team.
What’s your general routine? I am stationed at the Rama 9-Ratchada area from 8am-8pm. I will monitor any accidents and help transport casualties to the hospital as fast as possible.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? Most people are a little afraid and ask how I cope with the blood and bodies.
How much do you earn? B13,000.
Do you believe in ghosts? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? Yes. I once smelled a dead body in my apartment. I went out to work and was radioed that a body had been found in a building elsewhere in my area. When I arrived at the scene the scent of the body was the exact same smell as at my apartment. I think the dead man might have come looking for me to help him.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? I don’t drive or do things recklessly anymore. We can die so easily.
Philosophy? Everyone has their loved ones. Help them survive as much as possible.

Dead job #6

autopsy assistant

Squad leader Pol. Snr. Sgt. Maj. Banjong Thonghai, 39, is responsible for placing the bodies into the mortuary at the Institute of Forensic Medicine at the Police General Hospital before preparing them for autopsy.

How did you start doing this job? I graduated from the Royal Police Cadet Academy as a police lance corporal and became a crime scene police officer for six years. Then I applied to the Institute of Forensic Medicine as I thought it would be interesting.
What was seeing your first body like? I thought I was already familiar with seeing bodies at crime scenes. But in fact, I found that I really couldn’t handle seeing the bodies undergoing the autopsy operation. I couldn’t eat for weeks.
What’s your general routine with the body? I take any new bodies that have arrived to the mortuary room, then take the bodies that we received the day before to the autopsy room to prepare them for the doctor. I had to practice cutting open the bodies, as we actually cut open Thai and foreigner’s different ways. For Thais we just make an “I” shape incision while for foreigners we cut a “Y” shape. Some foreigners might have an open coffin so the Y shape is better for dressing. Once we’ve cut open the main body, I then have to saw open the head to reveal the brain. The first time I had to carry a brain, my hands were shaking. The most difficult bodies are the ones that have been injected with formalin to preserve them. It makes the body very tough and also it’s so smelly and acrid. If there is some big incident like a tsunami or plane crash, we also have to go to the scene to help identify the bodies.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? Curiosity about how I can deal with it.
How much do you earn? Depends on our police ranks. Now I receive B16,000 plus.
Do you believe in ghosts and spirits? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? I’ve never seen a ghost, but I have experienced weird feelings, like finding it hard to breathe as if something was constricting my body. But I’m not sure. Maybe I just slept in the wrong position.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? We’re all the same, we come with nothing and go with nothing. So why not try and do good things.
Philosophy? Sympathy to the dead and bring them justice.

Dead job #7

Living with the Dead

Rung Poebua, 52, is the undertaker at the 150 year old cemetery situated on Silom Road, the largest Chinese cemetery in Bangkok. He’s responsible for making sure the dead get to their final resting place without any hitches.

How did you start doing this job? My family have been undertakers for this cemetery for ages and ages. I have been working at this job since I was born.
What’s your general routine with the body? I do everything from digging the hole and decorating the graves to cleaning the cemetery for annual festivals like Chinese New Year or Qing Ming. Now there are real estate developments that are taking over parts of the old cemetery to build on, so I have to dig up the old graves and take the bodies out for relatives to move them to a new cemetery. Some bodies are now just bones, but some are all dried like a mummy. I handle the whole cemetery.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? They understand what we’re doing.
How much do you earn? Depends on what the relatives give. We have to have another job because we can’t make a living just taking care of the cemetery.
Do you believe in ghosts and spirits? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? Never.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? Handling lots of graves makes me take a more relaxed outlook on life.
Philosophy? Respect the dead.

Dead job #8

Dead Focus

As crime photographer at the Thairath Newspaper, Suvasan Chomkaew, 37, has spent the last ten years capturing some of the most grisly cases for Thailand’s biggest selling daily paper.

How did you start doing this job? I applied in 1996 right after I graduated from Siam University with a major in Advertising. I felt that this job would never be boring. New things happen every day which is kind of fun. I don’t even have to read the newspaper because I am there at the heart of the action.
What was seeing your first body like? It wasn’t actually for work. It was my friend’s brother and he had been kept in the coffin for 100 days. When they took him out, the body looked so bad I nearly threw up. The image of it stopped me from sleeping.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? They keep asking me how I can encounter so many horrific incidents.
How much do you earn? B10,000 plus good welfare.
What’s your general routine with the body? I cover any news events, but in some cases there are bodies. All I have to do is be there first but not destroy the evidence at the crime scene. I have to take a great shot of the body to get it printed on the front page. Once, I even asked a volunteer to carry a severed arm of a guy and put it next to his body. That picture made the front page of the next day’s newspaper.
Do you believe in ghosts? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? Never. Just exciting experiences covering some of the biggest news stories and trying not to get caught taking the photos!
Has it changed your attitude towards death? It makes me more careful about daily life. Some people died so easily even though they only had a tiny cut, while someone who loses an arm survives. Now I’m much less negligent.
Philosophy? Make the great shot but don’t take too much risk.

Dead job #9

The final touches

Make-up artist Manassaporn “Sri “ Amornnan, 47, who works at the Chest Disease Institute, Nonthaburi province, has the task of making sure the deceased look their best in the next life.

How did you start doing this job? I worked in a coffin shop for 17 years and have now been stationed at the Chest Disease Institute mortuary selling coffins for the pastfive years. It all started when I noticed the bodies using the coffins in the shop were so pale. I wanted to make them look better, so I started using my own cosmetics. Then some families asked me to take the job more seriously, so I decided to do it as the main part of the job. I even took a short make-up course to learn more.
What was seeing your first body like? At the beginning I was scared but now not at all. I got used to it.
What are people’s reactions when they find out what you do? They say I am such a cool woman who can be so at ease with a dead body.
How much do you earn? B9,000 plus.
What’s your general routine with the body? My work is to take care of the body once it is moved down to the morgue. I have to clean the body, handle the paper work, store the body in a frozen room, contact the family, sell them a coffin and do the make-up. In case the family can’t afford to buy a coffin, I try to arrange for a donation. I will take care of the body until it is moved to the temple.
Do you believe in ghosts? Yes.
Any supernatural experiences? Only once. I was putting make-up on the body as usual and another guy was injecting the formalin into the body at the same time. That night I had a dream that the person came to tell me that when the formalin was injected into her body, she choked, just like what you’d feel when you drown. Ever since, I speak to the body every time before we inject the formalin. It’s weird that many times, the family will come up to me and say, “How did you know that the person likes their make-up done this way or in this particular color?” So I think the spirits somehow can connect to me.
Has it changed your attitude towards death? I’m easy going and don’t expect too much. Human’s are nothing. Only good deeds will last.
Philosophy? I ask for permission from the body every time, tell him or her to somehow let me know what color I should do or which style he or she would prefer.

BK Asks: If you could talk to anyone who is already dead, who would it be?

Tales of dumb deaths from Thailand in 2010

Ready to party? Have a look at our round-up of Halloween shenanigans

“As one character says, high school is like a four-year prison sentence with no hope of parole. After 105 minutes of You Again, I felt the same way about the movie.” Bob Bloom, Journal and Courier (Lafayette, IN)

“Grown women are reduced to acting like bitchy teens in this painfully unfunny comedy about high school rivalries that just won’t quit.”Maitland McDonagh, Miss FlickChick

“What’s it say about your movie when even Betty White can’t find a decent laugh? Roger Moore, Orlando Sentinel

“Those bemoaning the lack of quality female roles in modern-day Hollywood will find a key cause célèbre in You Again, which manages to squander three generations of formidable actresses.” Andrew Barker, Variety

“There is not a laugh to be found in this rancid, misogynistic revenge comedy.” Stephen Holden, New York Times

“Why wait so long for a sequel? It’s not like the writers spent nine years polishing the script to perfection. (Instead, they filled it with punchlines about butt-sniffing.)” David Cornelius, Popcornworld

“The kitties and puppies are cute to look at, no doubt, but your average cat on YouTube is far more charming than anything in this kitty litter.” Adam Graham, Detroit News

“A dog’s breakfast.” Simon Weaving, Screenwize

“We should be getting Hollywood level special effects, not rejects from Build-A-Bear.” Willie Waffle, WaffleMovies.com

“Better than the original Cats & Dogs. But so is a rabies shot.” Glenn Whipp, Los Angeles Times

“Kids will need to be positively subnormal to enjoy a film this dreadful.” David Edwards, Daily Mirror

“Less a movie than a Zac Efron photo album, and why did they give the entire plot away in the trailer?” Jackie K. Cooper, jackiekcooper.com

“Where’s a vampire when you need one?” Tom Long, Detroit News

“It’s like a friend you’re not that fond of sobbing sloppily on your shoulder.” Katey Rich, CinemaBlend.com

“If Zac Efron hadn’t signed on, this sappy spiritual fantasy would certainly have skipped the cineplex altogether—in favor of eternal rotation on cable.” Elizabeth Weitzman, New York Daily News

“Steers and his screenwriters aren’t aiming for logic; they’re leading up to the next opportunity for Efron to remove his shirt.” James Berardinelli, ReelViews

“Some bad movies should carry a leper’s bell to warn off ticket buyers. Such a contagion is Charlie St. Cloud, a load of mawkish swill starring Zac Efron.” Peter Travers, Rolling Stone

If your pet could talk, it would probably not have that much to say. What’s there to complain about? They’re fed, washed, cleaned up after and are probably pretty content with their lot. But sometimes they get sick, can’t follow you to the restaurant and pee all over the living room couch, or you get bored and decide they need a new haircut—and then you wish they could tell you what exactly they are digging. Well, you know us—BK knows Bangkok best—and that includes your critters, too.

Dolce the Diva

Breed: Toy Poodle
Age: 4
Sex: Female

Oh, my, gosh! Did I just like die and go to heaven? Seriously. Have you guys, like, ever tried out the Dog Spa at ZEN (6/F Zen Department Store, CentralWorld, Ratchadamri Rd., 02-100-9999. www.zen.co.th)? It was just soooooo fabulous!! I got a mani (B150-275). Or is it a pedi? Whatevs, my nails are now all pink! I’m sooo lovin’ it girls. Well my mom was there shopping but she didn’t, like, dare let me stay home alone. They’re fixing our wallpaper and she was scared those people might steal me or something as I’m, like, so precious and all. So she dropped me at the spa and I got myself an aroma bath in their Jacuzzi tub (B200-250). I wanted the massage (B400-700) but Mommy said we didn’t have time so I got an oil treatment for my hair instead (B150-300). Am I not looking PHAT? No, not FAT you twit, it’s Pretty-Hot-And-Tempting.

Last week Mommy and Daddy went to Paris and they couldn’t take me with them. Bummer. I could, like, totally see myself strolling down the Champs-Élysées. Instead, they booked me a room at Petropolitan Hotel (Ozono, 307 Sukhumvit Soi 39, 02-259-2788. www.ozono.us) and it was so awesome. Maybe not Paris-awesome, but Bangkok-awesome. They have a spa and a big comfy park (See J-Avenue for the Pooch and You) where you can take your beauty stroll. The best part is it’s a completely exclusive members spot so you can be guaranteed you don’t have to mingle with the riff raff.

Anyway girls, gotta run. Let’s hook up, maybe grab a Dogkery chicken liver brownie (B89, various locations, 02-564-6707. www.dogkery.com). I gotta watch my line, though, these things are addictive.

Spike the Sporty

Breed: Bulldog
Age: 2
Sex: Male

One small pee on the couch and I get sent off to boot camp. SJ K9 (02-748-8494. www.sj-k9.com) isn’t all bad, though. They taught me some commands that make my owner so proud when he shows me off to his mates (B10,700 for a basic 120-day behavioral course). And the school is in Pattaya, so at least I got a chance to strut my stuff on the beach! There was an exam at the end but I made it and now I have a certificate to prove it.

I bumped into my friend Jumpy the Jack Russell the other day and she had just finished the training herself. She didn’t have it rough like I did though; she didn’t get sent away! She did her training in town at Doggie Doo (71 Soi Yenakart, Nanglinchee Rd., 02-286-6849. www.doggiedoo.net) so she didn’t have to stay overnight and there were only 10 sessions (B15,000). It sounded more like a playground than a training center. I mean they have a swimming pool, spa and even nice hotel rooms for her to stay in. Lucky bitch.

Right, gotta run, I asked Jumpy to meet me later at Paradise Park (5/5 Moo 18, Borommarachachonnanee Rd., 02-448-1282. www.petparadise2004.com). I plan on taking her for a walk down to their big lake or maybe going for a swim in the pool. If I play my cards right, it could lead to some serious butt sniffing.

E-Z the Exotic

Breed: Brookesia Chameleon
Age: 2
Sex: Female

Oh, joy, my owner just got another African lizard for this exotic petting zoo I’m forced to call home. I guess it’s not his fault for wanting something other than a poodle as a friend, but you’d think he’d realize that we might not really belong here.

I mean, I used to live on this beautiful island called Madagascar and spent my days basking under the equatorial sun while dining on a choice of tasty tropical insects. Then, I got rounded up with all my buddies and sent off to Chatuchak Market. They all died on the way; I was the only one left. I’d tell him he killed 20 of my family just to get me but I don’t talk. I’m a chameleon.

Neither do I have wifi in my little cage, otherwise I’d report my butchering traffickers to TRAFFIC (Wildlife Trade Monitoring Network, www.traffic.org) and stop this cruel practice.

I wonder how that African lizard tastes.

Cookie the Companion

Breed: Si Sawat
Age: 1
Sex: Male

I’m adopted. I don’t know my dad. Well, I might, but my mom having slept with the whole neighborhood, it’s hard to tell. Anyway, she got run over. Yeah, sad. But then the SCAD picked me up (See Second Chance) and they put my picture in the classifieds of BK Magazine and I got a new home.

Some of the animals I saw at SCAD were pretty rough, though. They were mean and dirty but the humans helped them anyway. They stay on the streets, though. You gotta be a good kid to be put up for adoption. One thing we have in common is we get our balls chopped off. Ouch.

My owner, I don’t think her mom slept with half the neighborhood. She seems to be more the hiso type. In fact, she’s taking me to Am Pet (48/42 Nawongpracha Patana Rd., Don Muang, 02-978-6451, 081-623-1562. www.ampet.net) tomorrow to take some studio pictures. Imagine that. Me, getting my picture taken.

Gummy the Goner

Breed: Daschund
Age: 8
Sex: Male

Yeah, I’m dead. Come on, you’ve been reading about talking animals, you can deal with dead talking animals.

I almost bit the dust two years ago, if my owners hadn’t rushed me to Kasetsart Veterinary Hospital (50 Phaholyothin Rd., 02-972-8756/-9. http://hospital.vet.ku.ac.th/) for a blood transfusion. I was walking down my soi minding my own business when this motorcycle taxi hit me in the stomach. Guess my fat tummy wasn’t big enough to protect me.

Then I became paralyzed, I could no longer walk and I started developing heart problems. So I was admitted to the Thonglor Pet Hospital (205/5-8 Thonglor Soi 9, 02-712-6301/-4). They had like four vets taking care of me. One took care of my heart, one helped me exercise, one was injecting me with insulin and one helped me calm down. Now, that’s service.

Well in the end, I didn’t make it. This white Chihuahua with wings came to me and said it was time for me to go. The next day, I saw my human masters putting my picture next to this urn they got at World Pet Angle (40/736 Moo 10, Khlong Lum Jiek Rd., Bung Kum, 02-509-2007. www.wpa.co.th).

Now, I have wings, too.

Foxtrot the Farm boy

Breed: Zebra
Age: 10
Sex: Male

I love people. You know they really are so entertaining, wandering around on their back legs all day. It’s really cool the way they let them in to see us at our place in Khao Kheow (235 Moo 7, Bang Phra, Sriracha, 038-298-270. www.kkopenzoo.com). The other Zebras and I just crack up looking at them and the way they make weird squeaking noises—it’s almost like they’re talking to each other. Because this is something called an open zoo we get a chance to get real close to the humans. It’s so funny. Some humans even come and stay overnight at the zoo (not with us of course).

Still it’s not all fun. There’s this one new guy I know, Kicks, who’s been a right pain in the rump since he moved here. He used to be at Dusit Zoo (71 Rama 5 Rd., 02-281-2000. www.dusitzoo.org), in Bangkok, and he thinks we country zebs are all baan nok. What a jerk. I’ve met some of the Dusit Zoo folks before and they were pretty nice. Guess he did something bad to get exiled, perhaps got involved with the square jawed guy, there. He looks a bit like a horse.

I think I got it pretty good, though. My cousin Stripes, who’s hanging out at Safari World (99 Panyaindra Rd., Samwatawantok, 02-914-4100/-19. www.safariworld.com), says the open zoo there is also pretty cool though the humans sound pretty darn lazy. Apparently they just drive around in their four wheeled metal boxes to see the animals up-close. Stripes did say the place is kinda old but he’s hoping more people come along so that way he’s got something to keep him entertained. Sorry gotta go look at this new batch coming through the gates. Man, you gotta see the size of that one’s head.

Gargoyle the Gigolo

Breed: Siamese
Age: 1
Sex: Male

Yo mah peepz, how’s it hangin’? Damn, where all de kittens be? Papa needs some love! I been meowing my balls off fo’ weeks already for the Boss to let me out but he thinks I up to no good. Well fo shizzle ma nizzle, yo crib ain’t got no honey for me!

I was jammin’ with mah crew de other day and mah man Puzz was all pimpin’ and I was like day-um! He got himself some blingin’ new collar (B450) and a serious bell to go with. Now that’s how you get the honies, baby. He sez he got them shiz when the Boss took him to Prima Dog (B1/F Central Chidlom (parking lot), Phloenchit Rd., 02-655-5645). Yeah he sez it ain’t for just dawgs yo, us cats can live it up there too. Best hair prods and get-ups (B240-550) in town for us pimps, ya’ll. They even got themselves some love seats (pet couch, B2,500) for the snuggling. That’s what Papa needs in his crib.

But then mah boy Clawz sez the joint at Zen (6/F Zen Department Store, CentralWorld, Ratchadamri Rd., 02-100-9999. www.zen.co.th) is damn more trippin’. They got some serious pet wheels (pet carts, B5,000), too. You dun even haf ta drive man, can just be sittin’ takin’ in the cool breeze. They even got a beauty shop but it ain’t for us felines sez them Zen people. Damn dawgs, they take everythin’ from us cats. I could use some serious highlights (B550 per 8 square cm, for dogs only) for mah fur, Papa needs some attention.

Anywayz, enuff with da babblin’, I got meself some lickin’ to do. Ya’ll, hit me up at ma Catster at www.catster.com/cats/700252 if ya wanna chill.

Pet-Friendly Places

BK Asks: "If you were a stray dog, what would you do?"

Directed by Bryan Bertino, starring Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman

“How bad is a stalker/killer flick when it’s just as lame whether the victims live or die? All suspense and no payoff doesn’t look clever, just lazy.”
Kevin A. Ranson, Movie Crypt

“Sometimes, dear reader, there’s no place like home, and that’s just where you should be when this gorefest opens at a theater near you.”
Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor

“Bertino directs at a funereal pace. Speedman remains comatose, though Tyler flickers fitfully to life. The mournful look on her face suggests she’s remembering the days when she was given more psychologically complex scripts, such as Armageddon.”
Lawrence Toppman, Charlotte Observer

“Let’s give writer-director Bryan Bertino credit. He knows how to frame a shot to make characters seem vulnerable. Now for his next trick, he just needs to turn his talents toward something that isn’t repulsive.”
Mick LaSalle, San Francisco Chronicle

See our movie review of The Strangers here