My mother was very angry when I started in the movie business. I was always absent from school, so she asked me to quit. After I’d earned some money and some savings of my own, I went back to school again. I paid for my education to make up for my past behavior.

The most important thing is to love what you do. You see new faces in the entertainment business all the time, but most of them come and go. Maybe those who go just don’t love the work. If you love it, you’ll be able to live with it.

A week or a month of work cannot make anyone a good host. You have to live and learn with it for years, finding out what you lack and learning from the experience. If I hadn’t got to work with hosts like Doo Sunya, I wouldn’t be able to work as I do today. I would still be the same aggressive person.

When I’m at home, I don’t talk that much.

There are actually no books or courses that can really tell you how to be a good host. But in my 20 years of experience, I’ve learned that good work comes from good teamwork.

My shape is never an obstacle. Do I want to be slim and slender? Yes, I do. But audiences open their minds to me; however fat I am, they still accept me.

I agree with the new measure that models must not be too skinny. I’d love to see people looking healthier on the catwalk. Moderation is best. The model business should have changed its values ages ago.

We can all be beautiful in our manner and in the way we act.

One must learn about oneself and look inside one’s heart. That’s meditation. Meditation is another happiness.

I feel my life is complete.

Once I thought that having a child would fulfill my family life, and my husband also wanted a child. But my husband and I discovered that we could be happy together, just the two of us.

I want to leave this world without any worries. I used to be very afraid of death because I didn’t know what would happen to those left behind: who would take care of my husband? And what about my debts? But when I learnt about meditation and started to practice dharma, I was less afraid.

Love for me is friendship. If we feel that someone is our friend, we can live with that person for a long time. If you feel possessive, it can drive you crazy.

Songkran is a uniquely Thai tradition with as many ways to celebrate it as there are colors in the rainbow. If you’re really anxious to get started, head to www.songkran.net right away and start some cyber splashing. For some more exciting options, turn off your computer and read on while Saransri Prawatpattanakul has the know-how on essential equipment before leaving for the front.

Try Traditional

Traditionally, Songkran is the day you spend time with your family and pay respect to your elders, but if you really want to get into the holiness of the holiday, you might want to start at Sanam Luang. There will be a celebration co-organized by the TAT and BMA, Apr 8-15. On Apr 12, the Phra Buddha Sihing will be delivered to Sanam Luang and open for ritual bathing.

Though it’s better known for consumerism than culture, another option is the Suan Lum Night Bazaar Apr 12-16 for its International Songkran Festival 2007. It’s B250 per day (www.thaiticketmaster.com) and includes all the traditional Songkran happenings, like a holy bath for the Buddha image, building a sand pagoda, traditional dance shows and an OTOP sale.

Making merit at Wat Arun, a.k.a. Temple of the Dawn, (34 Arun Ammarin Rd., 02-465-7740, 02-462-3762) is a particularly auspicious way to greet the new dawn of the New Year. If you really need to rack up some good graces for 2550, join Chao Phaya Trip: Wai Phra Kao Wat (B199), a guided boat trip to nine wats throughout the city (details at www.thaiticketmaster.com).

Playin’ Posh

This year, instead of celebrating by doing things that are bad for your body (getting drunk, staying out all night in wet clothes, dirty water, dirty people), pick a place where you’ll be pampered.

Wine isn’t just good for a buzz—it can also be therapeutic for your skin, too. At Flore Pleno (571, 2/F, Fenix Tower, Sukhumvit Soi 31, 02-662-2621. Open daily 11am-9pm. Book two days in advance), tell ‘em you want to try the Tropical Wine Spa Delight (B3,000): 120 minutes in a bathtub full of wine. (Remember: red with meat, white with fish.)

Prefer something non-alcoholic? You can dip your body in tea at Spa of Qinera (172/1 Soi Pipat 2, Narathiwat Ratchanakarin Rd., 02-636-8306/-8. Open daily 10am-10pm) with the Herbal Tea Bath (B500/45 minutes), which tightens and refreshes your skin. Alternatively, have a calming Chromotherapy Bath (B900/30 minutes) in Red Roselle juice at Devarana Spa (9/F, The Dusit Thani, 946 Rama 4 Rd., 02-636-3596. Open daily 9am-10pm).

For more general spa treatments, Spa Herbnara (117/8, 5/F Pranjit Tower, Thonglor, 02-712-9509. Open daily 9:30am-9:30pm) offers three tempting Songkran Festival Packages (B1,000-1,200), each with a soothing body scrub and/or massage.

Another way to get close to water without letting someone splash you is on a dinner cruise. (Getting to the pier is your problem.) The Manohra Special Songkran Dining Cruise (B1,900, 02-477-0770) takes you by Wat Arun and the Grand Palace and includes exotic drinks, an eight-course Thai seafood meal and a Thai silk souvenir for every couple.

Cleanse Your Body and Soul

Forget water for a second and do some cleaning on a more spiritual level. Choose from either overnight or day classes at the Sathira-Dhammasathan (B200, 24/5 Watcharaphol, Ram Indra Soi 55, 02-510-6697. Open daily 8-am-5pm) holistic center with Mae Chee Sansanee. Another option is a three-day, three-times-a-day deal at the International Buddhist Meditation Center (Dhamma Vicaya Hall, Wat Mahathat, Na Phara Lan Rd., 02-222-6011. Open daily 8am-6pm).

Usually it’s your skin that gets wet on Songkran, but what about what’s on the inside? Colonic Hydrotherapy (B3,300) by Hydrohealth (4/F Erawan Bangkok, Ploenchit Rd., 02-250-7800. Open daily 10am-9pm) will flush you out so you can start the New Year with a toxin-free body. Water can also be used for a very special massage (not the Ratchada kind): Aqua Acupressure Massage (B4,500/session) at S Medical Spa (2/2 Phakdi Bldg., Wireless Rd., 02-253-1010. Open daily 10am-10pm) will have you floating about for the ultimate in deep stretching and relaxation. For something a little bit more intense, sign up for a 7-Day Detoxification Program (B13,000-B18,000) at Absolute Wellness by Rasayana Retreat (4/F, Amarin Plaza, Ploenchit Rd., 02-252-4404. Open Mon-Thu 11am-8pm, Fri-Sun 11am-6pm), which includes three to five colonic hydrotherapy treatments to wash your body to new levels of energy and balance.

Spendy Songkran

Why do you need to fly off to Hong Kong or Europe for a shopping spree? (Besides, you’re way too late to book a seat.) Instead support your local department store chains by taking advantage of this year’s monthly “shocking” sales. But get some expert advice, will ya? In Bangkok we have the choice of personal shoppers (Central Chit Lom, Ratchadamri Rd., 02-793-7044), personal stylists (The Emporium, Sukhumvit 24, 02-269-1000 ext 1336. Thu and Sun 10am-6pm) and lifestyle consultants (Gaysorn Shopping Center, Ratchadamri Rd., 02-656-1177), who can help you change your look if that’s what you want. Mind you that they need to be booked in advance.

Wet Yourself

Be an Xtreme fiend and wet yourself (sweat, we mean) this New Year. Head to the PTT Speedway (RCA, 02-203-1205. www.kartingstadium.com) for some serious indoor go-cart action.

Another cool way to escape the water is to get your grippy gear on and scale the heights at ProClimber (391/11 Soi Thanon Chan 42, Wat Phrayakrai, Bang Kor Laem, 02-211-5053. www.proclimberthailand.com). With a fake cliff adorned with handholds, this is a good place to get high with convenience, comfort and safety. Their climbing wall is a great place for beginners or curious climbers who are not ready for a free-falling death this Songkran.

If you want to stay cool but still get a thrill, here are two suggestions. One, dive with the sharks at Siam Ocean World (B5,300-6,300, B1-B2/F, 991 Siam Paragon, Rama 1 Rd., 02-687-2000. Open daily 9am-6pm) and see how exciting life can be breathing underwater. Or escape from the heat inside SubZero (4/F The Esplanade, 99 Ratchadapisek Rd., 02-354-2134. Open daily 11-1am), the recently opened ice skating park.

The In-Crowd

Don’t be afraid to go out. Come on: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. How many chances do urbanites get to bond with complete strangers? OK, OK, you’ve made your mind up. Home it is. For you cats who are afraid of water but were too lazy or cheap to book a flight out of town, there is always the barricade-yourself-in-your-flat-and-order-in option. So you won’t die of starvation, order from Jae Kee (02-655-8489, 7am-9:30pm) for Thai, JJ Delivery (02-712-3000, 9:30am-9pm, www.jjdelivery.com) for international dishes or from Pizzanotti (1344, 10:30am-9:30pm) for some edible pizza.

Bargain hunting for pirated movies on the street is too dangerous, so take a cab to Blockbuster (Sukhumvit 33/1, 02-662-1320. Open daily 10am-midnight), where you can rent new releases or buy old ones cheap. Membership is B300 but that’s the price you pay for dryness. At B199, the competition is a bit cheaper; visit Tsutaya (Try President Park, Sukhumvit 24, 02-661-1094. Open daily 10-1am) and rent Waterworld or The Waterboy.

Or how’ bout reading? You’ll need to plan ahead as books and water aren’t the best of friends. Ignore those idiots having fun, put on your thick glasses, and repeat after me, “I am a nerd, I hate fun, and I am proud.” Books Kinokuniya (www.kinokuniya.com) has just reduced the burden of human interaction with its online shop that offers the same selection as the physical stores. Unfortunately, they do not accept credit cards. If that’s a problem, you might want to try Asia Books (www.asiabooks.com) instead. If you want Thai books, log on to the Chula Bookstore (www.chulabook.com). They deliver even faster than the big chains, and all you have to do is pay the delivery boy, just like Pizza Hut.

This Means War

OK, OK, all you really want to do is splash around like there’s no tomorrow. Well, if you’re going to go into battle, be prepared. Getting soaked all day long and hanging around in a damp shirt can lead to sickness, so having the right top is important. Get smart and wear a fast-drying T from Equinox Extreme Shop (B 590-1,250. 3/F, Siam Discovery Center, 02-258-0340. Open daily 10am-10pm).

At the same shop, you can get a waterproof bag for your mobile phone from Aquapac (B950 and B1,200). Other valuables can be kept dry in a waterproof sack from Pro Cam-Fis (B450, 3/F, Siam Discovery Center, 02-658-0314/5. Open daily 10am-10pm).

Now you’re ready to jump in, but you’ll need a weapon along with your defenses. Water guns will be everywhere, but for the best selection and prices, hit Yaowarat (see page 12). Where to go? The first stop is Khao San Road, where the fun runs from noon until midnight. This is the place to fight with backpackers, Thai teens and many tipsy people. Gropers are out in abundance here, so girls, beware of your boobs, and guys, mind your package.

Had too much of those kids and farang? Get yourself to RCA (Rama 9 Rd.) or Silom Soi 4 from 8pm onwards. On RCA you’ll get to meet many hotties with buckets cruising the strip. Fortunately you can escape just by going indoors: most bars and clubs on the strip have very tight rules outlawing water play once you cross the threshhold. If you want to experience armageddon, (attempt to) run the gauntlet of Silom Soi 4, a dead-end alley with the most interesting and diverse crowd in town. (Homophobes, stay home!)

Wonder Woman

Who: Khunying Jaruwan Maintaka
What: Auditor-General of Thailand
Why we love her: We love the fact that a woman accountant made so many supposedly macho men dive for cover. After fighting corruption in the Office of the Auditor General of Thailand for years, she was promoted to top dog in 2001—and that’s when life got bumpy. Khunying Jaruwan was eventually asked to resign from her position because she blocked, stopped and revealed too many of the corrupt projects started by the last government and refused to tell Dear Leader Thaksin what he wanted to hear. She also refused to step down then and continues to stand up for what’s right now without showing any fear of those in power. Last year Khunying Jaruwan received the “Yod Ying [Super Lady] of the Year” award from the Association for the Promotion of the Status of Women.
The moral of the story:
• Be strong, honest and stand by your actions if you’ve done nothing wrong. People will notice and support you, and your magical bracelets will help you deflect the critical bullets of the bad guys.

Doctor Justice

Who: Khunying Pornthip Rojanasunand, MD
What: Acting Director of the Justice Ministry’s Central Institute of Forensic Science
Why we love her: She’s the most eccentric doctor we’ve ever seen—funky outfits and spiky hair only enhancing her larger-than-life reputation. Dr. Pornthip introduced Thais to that mysterious science known as forensics long before Mr. Grissom and his pals appeared on the boob tube. Honest, outspoken and impatient with bullshitters and bums, the Khunying clashes frequently with the men in brown; she’s been sued, denied her deserved position (what’s this “acting” nonsense?) and had her qualifications (and fashion sense) questioned—and she could probably make a helluva lot more money in the private sector (or in Laos, where they offered her a job)—but she continues to serve this country fighting crime and helping the cause of justice.
The moral of the story:
• Don’t judge a book by its cover—it’s what’s inside that counts.

Feisty Filmmaker

Who: Soraya Nakhasuwan
What: Director of Final Score
Why we love her: A student of master filmmaker Jira Malikul, Soraya made a movie nobody thought she could make—and a movie nobody thought would be seen. Her documentary about students has proved skeptics wrong, not just about the project itself but about female directors. Even with King Naresuan playing on practically every screen in town, her unscripted flick has proved popular.
The moral of the story:
• Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

What do you think of women’s role in society today?
Women have become more independent and we can do men’s jobs. Women are humans, too, so we should have equal rights as men.

Why can’t men replace women?
There’s something in men and women that is different. For some jobs, women are more thorough than men. Like my movie, Final Score, you might think that as a woman I might be more sensitive for this project, more thorough and convey the story better than a man. And maybe because it’s a movie about the reality of a boy’s life, that means it needs a flexible, compromising director who knows how to communicate with others. However, I do think it depends on personality not gender. For example, my boyfriend is a good cook, whereas I cannot cook. It’s about what interests you and doing what you love to do.

If you had the power to change anything in the world, what would you change?
I, personally, believe that if we can just change a tiny thing, then it will change the bigger picture later. For example, if some drivers just stop their cars at the crosswalk for others, which is a small thing, there will be a big change and people will start to respect each other more.

Who is your role model?
Actually I really don’t have an “idol” but I do like Agnès Varda, a French New Wave director. Her movies are rarely shown in Thailand, but I think they’re pretty funky.

What would a world without men be like?
I love men! They have something good in them. There shouldn’t be anything missing, male, female, gay or lesbian. Everything that nature has given us is the best.

What’s next?
I’m writing my own movie script. It would be a fantasy and mainly about women. It’s a shame that it won’t be a big project, though. After two years of following boys around I’m sort of bored of them. Nah! Just kidding. Actually it’s something that I’ve always been interested in and it will be exaggerated from my personal experiences. I don’t know who will be the investor yet.

Mighty Mom

Who: Pui Pimolwan Suppayang
What: Co-host of Phuu Ying Tung Phuu Ying, managing editor at Mother & Baby (Thailand) and founder of Pang Rum Spa
Why we love her: Pui came to our attention when she debuted on Phuu Ying Tung Phuu Ying (Women to Women) with her unique character: a stingy, young, executive mother-housewife. Representing people who are lucky in love, work and family, Pui is a news anchor, TV show host, magazine editor and owner of a spa on Sukhumvit 39. She’s the lone married voice on the hugely successful talk show and is never shy to admit that she’s khem (thrifty), and demonstrates ways we can save, (or wisely spend), our bahts, and still have a good time and a great life.
The moral of the story:
• You don’t need money to be happy.

Super Saver

Who: Pavena Hongskul
What: President of the Pavena Foundation for Women and Children
Why we love her: OK, we’d love her more if she had chosen a different name for her foundation, but there’s no denying that Pavena’s heart is in the right place. As a politician she stood out from her female contemporaries, appearing on the front page of newspapers helping poor girls escape from abuse. She’s from a privileged background, but she’s not afraid to get scrappy even if it means messing up her hair or nails. Pavena’s self-supported foundation helps abused and poor children; when things get bad for girls, her name is on the top of the list of people they can turn to.
The moral of the story:
• Be kind and supportive to other living beings.

The Fighter

Who: Nong On, Udomporn Polasak
What: Clean and jerk weightlifter at the 2004 Olympics, Thailand’s first female gold medallist
Why we love her: When it comes to the Olympics or any other international sporting event, we normally just keep our eyes on boxing, where we can expect Thais to net a few medals. Unfortunately, in the 2004 Olympics, our glove-wearing champs took a beating. Then, out of nowhere, female weightlifting was the sport to bring joy to our bereaved nation as Nong On became the first female Thai athlete to win gold at the Olympics. She went head to head with Indonesia’s top athlete, chewed her up, and spit her out, lifting a whopping 125.5kg where Indo’s champ could only take on 122.5kg—wimp! Not only she won the medal but her performance broke the Chinese record from the previous games (2000). As she prepared to do her lift, we’ll never forget her throaty cry “Suu woi!” that would forever mark one of the most decisive moments in female sports in Thailand. We applauded, screamed and were touched.
The moral of the story:
• Just grunt and do it.

Happy Gal

Who: Mam Surivipa Poonpipat (Gultangwattana)
What: Host of Surivipa, MC and owner of a nail salon and carwash
Why we love her: She’s an upcountry girl (she spent her childhood in Sakhon Nakhon) who grew up to become a superstar but still has her feet firmly planted in the ground. Remember that spat with reporters over whether her then pal Mam Kataleeya was pregnant? When Mam learned the truth, she stood up, publicly apologized to the press and cut her friend out of her life. She showed us that when you make a mistake, you should be an adult and fess up. We also love Mam for her personality—she’s always happy, calm and smiling, even when she’s being asked awful questions.
The moral of the story:
• Forgive and forget and life goes on happily ever after.

What do you think about the role of women in Thai society today?
We’re stronger and more accepted than before. Now society has opened up many roles for women.

Why can’t men replace women?
Men can be as beautiful as women but they can’t be mothers.

What is your definition of a woman?
I always keeps in mind that a woman is chang tao lang (follower) but not lar lang (outdated). From my personal experience, not everything that a woman does is the right decision. Women are not always right. In some aspect, women need someone supporting them. If something is supposed to be a man’s job, let them do their work. Why not? It’s too much trouble.

Who is a woman you love?
My mom.

What would a world without men be like?
There wouldn’t be any more fun. A dry life I suppose. Who would be subordinate to my emotional complexity?

If you could be a man for a day, what would you do?
I would want to be a monk. I want to know what life is like as a monk. I wouldn’t have said this 10 years ago, though.

Lady of Grace

Who: Pha Ji Atcharapan Paiboonsuwan
What: Actress, yoga instructor at Absolute Yoga
Why we love her: She was the host of Nuu Tam Dai, pha Ji played many roles on soap operas and has taught many professional actors. She dropped out of sight for a while, but pha Ji made her comeback doing yoga at 50-something and looked fantastic on the cover of Lips magazine. She made us realize how important it is to take care of ourselves, and not to be afraid of getting old.
The moral of the story:
• Age is just a number.

The Singing Foreigner

Who: Christy Gibson
What: Luuk thung singer
Why we love her: Before she became a star, Christy had been teaching people in rural areas and helping drug addicts for years. Not only does she sing luuk thung and mor lam—which ain’t easy—better than most Thais, she also speaks Thai better than a lot of Thais. She’s such an incredible artist that she was one of two luuk thung singers and the only farang to be chosen for the H.M. Blues project.
The moral of the story is:
• The beauty of Thai culture is universal.

How did you start singing luuk thung?
I studied music and voice throughout my youth with a foreign teacher. I learned classical and pop singing, and of course luuk thung, which was totally different and challenging for me. I wasn’t used to it at all. The notes, the style, the vibrato, the falsetto and everything are completely different. We started singing luuk thung songs from here and there and we bought CDs to listen to. But it was more difficult than I expected.

What do you think about the role of women in Thai society today?
I very much admire a lot of women in Thai society. Their role is delicate, because of the way the world is now. It’s fast paced, it’s very business oriented, you have to be on top, you have to be fast, you have to know what’s happening internationally. At the same time for Thai women, they have their culture and their family values, which are very important parts of Thai society. Respect and the family core are very important. I think that to be able to strike the right balance between both of those things—family values and culture on one side, and business on the other—is very admirable. That’s an incredible thing. And I think a lot of Thai women manage to do that and to do it well.

Are Thai women trying to be more western?
I don’t think so. I don’t see Thai woman losing their identity or as far as being Thai/Asian is concerned—at least for the majority. I think Thai women will continue to be Thai, because that’s where their beauty comes from. They’ll keep their Thai culture, but adapt the good from other parts of the world.

If you were man for a day, what would you do?
I would go to an exclusive club for gentlemen, because I want to see what they do inside. So when I change back I can say “I know what you do.”

What is your definition of a woman?
Someone who knows how to be strong and soft at the same time.
If you had the power to change anything in the world, what would you change?
I would change people’s perspective from a selfish one to an unselfish one. Because I think that a lot of the world’s problems stems from selfishness and greed. If we can eliminate those from the world, it would be a much nicer place.

Women we once loved

We admired these women for a while, but then they became overexposed or boring. But we don’t hate them and hope that one day they will be our sweethearts again.

Tata Young: She changed so much, from our sweet, cute, little sister to an international pop star. We applaud her confidence, but, Tata, keep it down a little bit when you still live in Thailand.

Rabiebrat Pongpanit: She means well, but pha really needs someone to help her find a nice and effective way of marketing herself to the public.

Aum Patcharapa: She did nothing wrong—it’s just that it’s now been two years since she was FHM’s sexiest women in Thailand. She’s probably more than just a sexy shell, but how would you know?

Mam Benlo: Yes, phee nuu Mam told us to forgive and forget and live on. Unfortunately, we still remember what she did, and she’s since lost the charm of a princess. She really needs to hire a good consulting firm and plan her return—a couple of baan baan soaps will do.

Nong Yad (Yadthip Rachapan): Another case of a spoiled young actress who’s been eaten up by the industry. From cute chick to soap opera villain.

Flore Pleno

2/F, Fenix Tower, 570 Sukhumvit 31, 02-662-2621. Open daily noon-10pm.
www.florepleno.com.

The concept: Hidden in a high-end skyscraper, this spa is furnished in modern Victorian style. The plain white walls adorned with oh-so-British flowery curlicues will thrill ladies-who-lunch and their wannabe-Londoner daughters. With its light pink touches, the spa might be too feminine for some, but princesses will just love it.

The facilities: Four spa service rooms and one mani-pedi area with all the facilities en-suite. Each room is painted with a different color to suit the treatment delivered within. The people at Flore Pleno believe that color can affect your mood and mind, so this allows you to receive even greater benefits from your treatment.

Signature treatment: One favorite is the “Tropical Wine Spa Delight” (B3,000/120-180 mins), where you are dipped in wine heated to 40°c, which is supposed to detox and rejuvenate your skin and mind. “Chamomile & Lavender Soothing” (B3,000/120-180 mins) is the preferred option if you’ve had a hectic week, since both chamomile and lavender have relaxing and soothing properties. Your metrosexual pal may opt for the “Extreme & Sport Massage” (B1,800/90 mins) that eases sore muscles and relaxes body and soul.

Price: Starting from B600 (a simple Foot Relax treatment) up to B30,000 (pre-wedding couple package). Somewhere in the middle is the “Timeless Rejuvenate” with caviar and pearl cream (B3,200).

Trinity Nail & Massage

2/F, The Third Place Bangkok, Thonglor Soi 10, 02-390-0655.
Open daily 10am-10pm.

The concept: Clean, modern and affordable—that’s Trinity Nail & Massage’s motto. It positions itself between high-end hotels and neighborhood day-spas with its fine-yet-reasonably priced treatments. The owner guarantees the products used here are of similar quality as The Oriental Spa and Mandara. Hygiene is also the key as Trinity Nail & Massage strives to be on the leading edge of sanitation and cleanliness. No musty towels or unclean pedicure equipment.

The facilities: The spa is relatively small, but it has all the amenities you’d want for a relaxing respite. Draped in dark purple, Trinity Nail Massage is equipped with four treatment rooms and five reclining chairs for foot massage, pedicure and manicure. The spa is willing to set up its chairs on the alfresco terrace for outdoorsy clients.

Signature treatments: The spa developed its treatments to suit the trinity of Thai, Japanese and Western clients. Drop by for a quick “Foot and Hand Spa” that offers a full manicure and pedicure along with hand and foot scrub and mask. Nail paint is also included in the treatment. Just choose you favorite nail colors from OPI and the skilled staff will have your fingers painted in no time. The four-hand massage, in which two therapists harmoniously perform a rub down with the same pressure and speed on corresponding spots, is also recommended.

Prices: The four-hand massage is B1,590/90 mins, while the “Hand and Foot Spa” is B500.Through February, however, Trinity Nail & Massage offers 30% discount for those who drop by before 2pm. The 2-hour treatment that includes body scrub, body mask and aromatherapy massage is also on offer at B990 until the end of this month.

Suk Spa

1/30 Sukhumvit 11, 02-651-2672. Open daily 11:30am-11pm. www.sukspa.com.

The concept: A boutique spa, tucked away in a sub soi of Sukhumvit 11. The theme is suburban Thai, with wood all around. You’ll be amazed that stepping inside takes you outside (again). The treatments rely on the four elements and real traditional folk herbs, which you can always go in search of outside Bangkok, where you’ll find chonnabot elders.

The facilities: Six rooms, two of which come with en-suite bathrooms (the others share their bathrooms and toilets). The en-suite rooms have outdoor showers and ohng (you do the pouring). A single Thai folk herbal steam tent, similar to a monk’s umbrella-like tent, is placed on the patio of the spa room just opposite the hair spa section. A mani-pedi section is on the third floor in what could be a living room.

Signature treatment: The anti-stress back and shoulder massage (B800/60 mins) uses heated mor klua (hot salt in a pot) instead of using luuk prakob like other spas, even placing it over crinum lily (plub plueng), just like grannies do. The “Suk Spa Massage” (B1,600/90 mins), a combination of Thai, aromatherapy and Balinese, is designed to soothe, cleanse and stimulate your blood circulation with the help of traditional Thai hot oil.

Price: Starting from B650 for the foot massage to B1,700-3,250 for the Suk Spa packages that include several different treatments in one go.

Urban Retreat

31/10 Soi Phromjai, Sukhumvit Soi 39, 02-204-2008/9,
www.urbanretreatspa.net. Open daily 10am-10pm.

The concept: Like its name suggest, Urban Retreat sets itself as a haven for urbanites, providing various relaxing treatments far from the hustle and bustle of the city. Urban Retreat is where you can get away from it all for a few hours and let the therapists rub away the stress of your day every day without breaking the bank.

The facilities: Five foot massage stations—six singles and one double—all fit on the second floor, but Urban Retreat manages its space very well. There is ample room to relax and enjoy the pleasure of peaceful privacy in the virginal white décor that evokes a cozy ambiance of a Hua Hin beach house.

Signature treatments: The “Urban Touch” treatment combines therapeutic Indonesian and Thai massage techniques with pampering Maldives-styled moves. If soft and clear skin is what you seek, try the “Shea Butter Body Massage” which promises to help soothe and moisturize your dry and sun-damaged skin. Facial treatments, which use products from Dermalogica, are also popular among Japanese housewives.

Prices: The most affordable treatment is Thai massage for B300/hour. “Urban Touch” and “Shea Butter Body Massage” are both B800/hour. Or opt for the February promotion at B990 that treats you to a 90-minute treatment of chocolate scrub and aroma oil massage.

Places to Shop - Expert Advice

For ... Parents

Think of all the times you’ve forgetten their birthdays, yet they still love you as much as when you were their little kid. At this festive time of year, take the opportunity to make amends and treat them properly. They deserve it.

Start with a handwritten note on the card that says, “This will keep you beautiful” and you’re sure to bring a smile to your mom’s face. The RMK X’mas Set (B2,600) from Central features RMK make up base and liquid foundation in a flash silver box.

For dad, get him something classic yet modern—just like him: a Nano shirt. Choose from the Cullinan Nano Capsule, which has anti-bacterial fluid injected into the fabric or the Cullinan Nano Perfume (B1,450), which is imbued similarly with perfume. Both available at Central.

Your mom’s been carrying around that old keychain for ages. Get her a new one with a touch of luxury: a Large Bohinc Key Purse (B6,645) from Playground!.

How about a multi-use box for your parents? Try a flower painted box by At Home (B450) from J-Gallery, which can hold anything from jewelry to spoons and forks.

For ... Colleagues

You work in the same soulless rabbit warren, you have coffee together, you share your feelings when the chips are down, you ask them for help when you are hungover or to lie to your boss when you sneak out to see your gig in the afternoon…aren’t these enough reasons for buying them something, jerk? You don’t want to spend too much, though.

Even if your female colleague is neither an executive or a lady, the DoiTung Ladies Executive Set (B1,500) from Mae Fah Luang, with a scarf, notebook and cosmetics bag, might make her look more lady-like, somehow.

For that colleague you’ve been secretly admiring, go Juicy Couture from Central: Lipstick (B1,650) or the Juicy Couture T-shirt pendant (B2,450). They double as key rings, too.

The Evita hair pin (B1,190) from Central, is specially designed with two legs and is suited for chicks who not only have thick hair but thick heads. Throw in a book and the package is complete.

A Starbucks Cash Card (starting from B100) is easy and something you know will get used.

For your astrology-reading friends, pick up some fortune cookies (box, B100) from My Place restaurant.

Climbing bags and roll top totes from RENE CHU Copenhagen (B3,500, B6,500 respectitvely) at Manga in CentralWorld are the epitome of hip and super-functional for all urbanites.

Give those with pillars of documents on their desks a Flower Paper Weight by M.L. Chiratorn Chirapravati (B2,000). Or try a painted photo frame by At Home (B450).

Help your friends get a good start on the year by planning ahead with this chic 2007 planner (B888) from Playground!.

For ... Gigs

Want to impress that new heartthrob in your life? Appeal to her cute side with a custom-made bear from Build-a-Bear (B695 plus) from Central, which you can stuff with tiny hearts, your own voice messages or, if you are at a loss for words, their ready-made messages. Dress it up with a Jean Jacket (B395) or other tops as you wish or just go bearback. It takes just 10-30 minutes to make one.

Keep her pretty in pink next year with a pink gift set from Marks & Spencer (B1,495). Though it may appear to be a more appropriate gift for grandma, your mattayom gig will surely love it.

Impress him with a Nokia N5300 XpressMusic (B9,620) from Nokia Shop, which can hold 1,500 songs in a microSD card (2GB) and can transmit music to your home stereo without wires.

Everyone loves an Apple. Try an inMotion iM500 (B6,590) from Mac Studio.

Planning a secret rendezvous with your gig? Surprise her with a Juicy Couture passport holder and bag tag set (B3,250) and your holiday season will surely be sweet.

She’s a smoker? Show your love with a Smokeshirt (B350) from Playground!, which covers the nasty warning picture with a pretty one. A healthier choice is the Little Music Box (B395) from Playground!, which plays one of four songs; “Happy Birthday,” “What a Wonderful World,” “Close to You” and “Can’t Take my Eyes Off You.”

An empty face pillowcase by Pang Nualphan Prasantong (B200) from J-Gallery is a nifty gift on which your gig can draw your face whenever you are apart.

For ... the Authorities

They are the ones keeping an eye on your street and just can’t wait to get a hold of your urine. Mr. Brown-Uniform has to work his ass off in order to keep us safe and it would be a good thing to get them something nice. Start with a DoiTung Coffee Lover Set (B990) from Mae Fah Luang—two coffee mugs and DoiTung Arabica coffee in a nice box. If he doesn’t like the mug inside the box, try a Starbucks Christmas Tree Mug (B380), an On With the Tradition Mug (B380), or better yet a Red Cup Tumbler (B460) for the longer hot drink.

A Motorola Bluetooth Headset H500 (B2,190), which works with all brands of phone, from the Motorola Shop is ideal for your neighborhood traffic cop. It’ll allow him to take his mistress’ call and still stop traffic so you can enter your soi.

Don’t forget to get something for the security guard in your building. Instead of the usual bottle of Black, surprise him with an Anti-Stress Back & Shoulder Massage from Suk Spa (B600/1 hour), which may help him release some of the tension you’ve been inducing all year.

For ... the Boss

Bosses may be the only lifeforms that you hate all month long, then love on payday. If you’re lucky enough, you might even love them more when they authorize your requested bonus or raise (hint, hint). No matter how bad they treat you during the year, you still “should” get them something to show that you know how to give and not just take, take, take!

Get your metrosexual boss a male toiletry gift set from Marks & Spencer (B1,495) at Central. That will please him during this celebratory time of year. Remember: bosses are human, too.

The leather Desk Pad from Liberia (B16,900) will surely make your boss’ desk look more exclusive and make it quite obvious that your lips are firmly placed on his/her butt. Or be less blatant and go for an elegant mocha and pink paperweight (B1,590).

What boss couldn’t use a little Colon Hydrotherapy (B2,400) from HydroHealth? Hand it over and hope for the best in the coming year.
Everyone loves to listen to music, even your cruel boss, so gather some cash from your collages and chip in for this JBL time machine dock for iPod (B11,990) from Mac Studio: Apple Center. It also has radio (FM and AM) and an alarm clock.

Spend Money Here

Central Chit Lom: Ploenchit Rd., 02-793-7777. Open daily 10am-10pm. BTS Chit Lom.

HydroHealth: 4/F, Erawan Bangkok, Ploenchit Rd., 02-250-7800, 02-250-7808. Open daily 10am-8pm. BTS Chit Lom.

Jay Mart: 4/f MBK Center, Phyathai Rd., 02-217-9368. Open daily 10am-9pm.

J-Gallery: 4/F, J-Avenue, Thonglor. Open daily 10:30am-7pm. Products are available through Dec 15 only.

Liberia Fine Stationer: Siam Society, 131 Asoke, 02-661-6480. Open Tue-Sat 9am-6pm, Sun noon-5pm.

Mac Studio Apple Center: 323/1, G/F, J-Avenue, Thonglor, 02-712-7620. Open Mon-Fri 10am-9pm, Sat-Sun 11am-9pm.

Mae Fah Luang: 4/F, Siam Discovery, Rama 1 Rd., 02-658-2427. Open daily 10am-10pm.

Manga: 1/F CentralWorld, 02-613-1177. Open daily 10am-10pm. BTS Chit Lom. www.manga.com.

Motorola Shop: 3/F, Siam Paragon, Rama 1 Rd., 02-610-9574. BTS Siam. Open daily 10am-9pm.

My Place: 824 Thonglor, 02-381-8812. Open daily 11am-10pm.

Nokia Shop: 3/F, Siam Paragon, Rama 1 Rd., 02-610-9778/9. Open daily 10am-9pm. BTS Siam.

Playground!: 818 Thonglor, 02-714-7888. Open daily 10am-10pm.

Starbucks: Try 231 Thonglor, 02-712-9691. Open daily 7am-10pm. BTS Thonglor.

Suk Spa: 1/30 Sukhumvit Soi 11, 02-651-2672, 02-651-0461. Open daily 11am-10pm. BTS Nana.

Expert Advice: Personal Stylist

Name: Apiwat Yodpraphan
Company: The Emporium
Cost: Free
Booking: Recommended. 02-269-1000 ext 1336.
Thursday and Sunday 10am-6pm

1. Buy something practical that is good value for money. Pricey but useless items do not count as much as gifts people can use.
2. Avoid personal stuff such as perfume, earrings, bracelets and clothes that involve size.
3. Find something that enhances their appearance and is handy in their career.
4. Quality is another element in choosing a good gift. Fine quality represents courteousness, thoughtfulness and the taste of the giver.
5. Keep up-to-date and study the trends.
6. Take into account his or her hobbies and interests.
7. Do some research beforehand. Ask their close friends or observe what particular items the recipient needs, what brands he/she uses, his/her favorite color and his/ her lifestyle.
8. Find something that goes with their personality. If he/she is an outgoing person and has to attend social functions a lot, an accessory that transforms his/her formal attire to a social dress without hassle is perfect.
9. Find something meaningful for your special or beloved one. Pamper them with a precious watch, or limited edition gift.
10. If you really can’t find the right gift, come to us for help.

Expert Advice: Personal Shopper

Who: Varindran Chancharoeng
Where: Central Chit Lom
Cost: Free
Booking: Recommended. 02-793-7044

Great Gifts From Boys to Girls
1. White gold with a small diamond pendant, or heart shaped jewelry on small chain like a necklace or bracelet
2. Heart-shaped brooch or pin (says “I always love you,” “You’re always in my heart,” or “I’m saving money for Valentine’s Day”)
3. Small eternity ring
4. Silk or charmeuse baby doll lingerie with bikini bottom to heat things up in the bedroom
5. Black or red silk satin or charmeuse teddy, one or two-piece. Should be very, very short for the same purpose as the baby doll

Great gifts From Girls to boys
1. Fun and affordable sports watch
2. Palm pilot
3. IPod with your voice programmed in it so he can concentrate while working out at the gym
4. Sweater or cardigan, just to remind him that you’re always around to warm him up no matter where he goes
5. One dozen fun and bold printed boxer shorts. Clothing you can share wearing for fun

Expert Advice: Lifestyle Consultant

Name: Ruankaew Dechprom
Company: Gaysorn Shopping Center
Cost: Free
Booking: Recommended. 02-656-1177

Suggestions for Holiday Gift Shopping
1. Purchase gifts when you find them, even if an occasion is several months away.
2. Great ideas come from everywhere. Don’t be afraid to talk to the people who know the recipient best. They’re likely to have great suggestions.
3. When in doubt, choose a gift that the recipient will actually use. Practical items are usually better than novelty.
4. White is classic, practical, and safe. When you have to buy a gift for an unfamiliar person, white is best as everything looks gorgeous in white.
5. Go surfing through websites for a wide range of choices and gift ideas to match the person’s interests.
6. If you don’t know the person well or are going to someone’s home for the first time, traditional gifts of wine, food, coffees or teas are foolproof.
7. Save your receipts just in case a return or an exchange is necessary.
8. Select a container that the recipient will want to save. Every time they use the container, they’ll remember you.
9. Gifts do not have to be expensive to be appreciated or appropriate. Gifts that show your time and effort are just as special as expensive ones.
10. If you run out of ideas, let me know!

GreenSpace (Heineken)

The place: The Central World Plaza, Ratchadamri Rd. Open daily 6pm-midnight.

The scene: Plain and simple. This year the big H hasn’t done much to the place in comparison to last year. They have a DJ booth, a moderate size stage, proper light and sound systems, food booths and all the typical offerings. Nine fans throughout the area disperse the heat.

The show: Each night is themed differently, featuring different types of music, including Rock Your World, Jazzy Fiesta and Retro Party. After the well known singers finish entertaining, the unknown but fair enough will take care of you for the rest of the night together with DJs.

The vibe: Fun-loving. Most of the people here are not sipping beers—they’re chugging.

The grub: Nine restaurants have set up booths this year: H&K Avenue Steak, Maxim’s (Western), Sam Muk, Thang Long, Plai Ngarm, Viset Gai Yang, Yuu (Japanese), Page 35 (Western) and Ab Sab by Krour Thanyawan.

A must: Viset gai yang (B115/whole) isn’t bad. Wash it down with a tower of cold Heiny.

The price: Food is B50-200, popcorn and fried shrimp are B30, ice B30, beer B50/glass, B150/jug and B450/tower (3 liters).

Beware: The deep fried spicy mushroom (B60) if you don’t want to spoil your night. If you are in a rush to get drunk, this isn’t the place to do it as it’s severely understaffed. Be patient—good things come to those who wait.

Singha Beer Garden

The place: Central World Plaza, Ratchadamri Rd. Open daily 5pm-midnight.

The scene: Not too interesting. It’s great for people who want to really relax with their friends for a chat. Typical Singha décor with logos and yellow all over the place. Fans to reduce the heat in the air.

The show: Three bands nightly playing Thai and inter hot hits from today and yesterday.

The vibe: Most of people here are young and not-too-professional. The atmosphere isn’t that attractive, at all—people are more here to chill out and would prefer to sit and chat than groove and move. Plenty of staff on hand to wait on you.

The grub: Eight restaurants: Gai Yang Singha (international), Somtam Poosri, Krua Petchakasem, Time Out, Ta-lay, Sushi bar, Krua Gumlaithong and Muu Satay Jueng Ang Luk.

A must: The food is notably good here, especially the gai yang Singha (B110/whole) and crispy pork knuckle (B130-250).
The price: Food is B40-300, ice B10, Corona B150, Miller Draft Beer B120, Singha Beer B50/glass, B120/bottle, B130/jug and B390/tower (3 liters). Singha Light Beer B60/glass.

Beware: If you are looking to meet some cuties, this is not the place to do it. Plentiful staff but sometimes they’re in very bad moods so mind your words.

The Elephant Walk (Chang)

The place: Central World Plaza, Ratchadamri Rd. Open daily 5pm-midnight.

The scene: Cool and trendy bar concept. Two types of seating for you: very comfortable sofas on the right side and beer garden plastic chairs in the middle. The sofas are a very cool idea because they attract numerous clients who like the chill chill style. It’s just like a fantasy garden in your backyard with good beer and good music.

The show: Three house bands each night and special concert every Friday.

The vibe: Fresh and relaxed. Great place for young adults, who will enjoy the music and atmosphere.

The grub: Five restaurants: ZAPP…ZA, Seafood, Arharn Thai Puen Baan, Bpahnun and German Sausage.

A must: Pla sum rii phao (B250/whole) and tom yum ruam mid (B120) are delicious.

The price: Food is B50-300, ice B20, beer B380/tower (3 liters), B130/jug (1liter), B100/glass, B30/can.

Beware: Those drunk guys sitting at the next table. They’ve polished off two towers already and they’ve got that hungry look in their eyes...

A lot has been said about the opening of our new airport, but whether we like it or not, it will soon be the only one we’ve got. Seeing as there is so much speculation about it (how do I get there? What can I do there? how can I get home?), BK has provided you with this (hopefully) very useful handbook. Just don’t forget to take this issue with you on your first visit to the multi-million baht building—it’s huge and easy to get lost inside. Trust us, we did.

Getting In and Out

Whether you are going to Nong Bua Lumpoo or Switzerland, if it’s after September 28, you have to go through Suvarnabhumi. Here’s some things you should know about traveling there.

Traveling time: It takes about 45 minutes to get there from the central business district (CBD)—Silom, Sukhumvit and Siam—via the expressway, depending on traffic. Leave a little extra time for finding your way around the airport, too, as it’s positively massive. If you are going via taxi, your driver will most likely know how to get to the airport, however navigating within the grounds may be another story. Keep that in mind.

Public Transport: Arriving at the airport, you’ll be dropped off at your terminal. However, leaving the airport will be a different story. Because of a “no-traffic-policy” in front of the terminals, taxis and buses are no longer allowed to wait in long lines for you outside the arrival gates. All public road transportation leaving the airport will now be routed through the Public Transportation Center—a five-minute shuttle ride from the airport itself (see Public Transportation box). You will, however, be able to radio taxis at the Public Transportation Center to come pick you up at the terminal, for a fee.

Driving: You can hop in and out of cars in front of the terminal, but you can’t park there. The long-term parking area is about 3-4 minutes away on the Bang Na Trad side. Short-term parking can be done in a building opposite the terminal that accommodates up to 5,000 cars. AoT will initially use the same price structure as at Don Muang (one hour B25, two hours B45, up to 24 hours B250), though these prices are scheduled to go up.

There are five main access routes to the Passenger Terminal by road. From the north you can come via the expressway; northwest via Rom Klao elevated highway and King Kaew Rd.; south via Bang Na Trad highway; northeast via Lad Kra Bung (On Nut); or west via King Kaew Rd.

Passenger Hall Layout

The passenger hall has seven floors above and two stories below ground. The basement stories will eventually be taken up by the Airport Link (see Public Transportation Box) and as such will not be opened until late 2007 at earliest.

• Basement: Baggage conveyor belts
• 1/F, The Bus Lobby: Buses to the Public Transportation Center and medical centers
• 2/F, Arrival Hall: For both international and domestic flights
• 3/F: Lounges, shops, restaurants and service centers.
• 4/F, Departure Hall: Airline check in counters, customs control, government offices, airport information center, shops, restaurants and departure passenger services
• 5/F: The offices of THAI and Star Alliance airlines
• 6/F: “Fine” dining floor
• 7/F: Observation Deck

Check In, Chickens

The gigantic check-in terminal is nearly 100% glass and lets in tons of light, so bring a pair of shades. The islands are named alphabetically with the first three for domestic flights and the other seven for international. Each island has two rows of check in counters and there are another 100 e-check in machines for passengers with no luggage going under the plane.

Considering the size of the terminal, knowing where your airline check in counter is before you arrive is a good idea—this can mean all the difference if you are running late. Don’t bother calling the Suvarnabhumi Call Center (02-132-1888) as it’s always busy or there’s no answer. Contact your air carrier directly.

After you check in, and before you step through the line of passport control, check which gate you will board. Otherwise, you might have to walk for miles once you get through customs. When BK took a tour of the airport, we experimented with walking time and it took a full 30 minutes going from check in point to the first concourse. Of course, this didn’t include window-shopping and ciggy break, so keep that in mind, too.

Custom-ary Law

Remember those unpleasant people queuing at customs with faces that look like they haven’t been to the toilet for years? Well, hopefully at Suvarnabhumi, we’ll all feel like those VIP’s whizzing past the line for a private passport check. Seventy-two counters are set up for departing passengers and 130 for arrival. 1,380 immigration officers have been furiously trained and are ready to be deployed at those booths. With any luck (fingers crossed), long lines should be a much more rare occurrence...as will those faces.

Safety First

Despite the rumor that permanent approval from the International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) has been granted until its official opening, the AoT has set up a very tight security system. Passengers having flown through the USA will be familiar with it; the rest of us might feel a bit uncomfortable.

Before you even enter the terminal, you will have to go through a metal detector and let the security people search your bags. Every checked piece of luggage will be x-rayed. The threat of a gel-bomb still haunts AoT officers; so don’t try bringing gel materials in your carry-on luggage. This seemed a bit harsh, so BK asked, “what if we need to apply some gel on our eczema every hour on a 12-hour flight? Can we still carry that on board?” The answer was “no,” so it looks like your are either going to scratch it all the way or sit there and tum jai.

After checking in, all passengers proceed to other side of the terminal. Here, there is another security check, where you will be politely asked to remove your jacket, empty your pockets into the basket (similar to at Don Muang), and step through the metal detector (again). If you’re lucky enough to cause a beeeep, you win a little intimate body search by a security lady.

It’s not over yet! Once you walk down closer to the actual boarding gates, you reach another row of Mr. and Ms. Wizards with their magic wands to check you body again. All in all, you better start going to the gym to prepare for all the body searches you are in store for at the new airport.

If a terrorist threat does happen to arise, a bomb squad is on hand and armed security guards roam the premises continuously. In this unfortunate situation, a useful tip from an insider who doesn’t want to be named told BK, “Leave the area right away. Don’t even think of doing traditional Thai moong (rubber necking).”

Food Time!

The Suvarnabhumi passenger terminal is divided into two main sections: Landside and Airside. Ignoring for a moment all the official business of customs, security and getting on and off the plane, the Landside is where all the stuff you can do before you get through security is located (mostly eating), while the Airside is where all the stuff you can do after security is located (shopping and other activities).

Though the airport is scheduled to open in less than a month, many well-known eateries rumored to have branches at Suvarnabhumi are reluctant to say whether they will “officially” be there. Unofficially, here’s what some of the eating options will be on the Landside.

The most economical choice will be on the ground floor, where the Magic Point Food Court offers various types of Thai food priced B25-B80 per dish. Most of the restaurants, though, will be located on the third floor, including a Yamazaki-type bakery called Bakery Chic, Black Canyon and Starbucks coffee shops, Lee Café and Luis’ Tavern. The Tate Café is one of the new faces in the airport, using the name and concept of the Tate Modern Gallery of Art in England. The fare will be international, offering French baked goods, Sukhothai fried noodles and deep-fried chicken wings from Manila. Prices will range from B75-175 per dish. The pricier eating options are located on the sixth floor, which is the “fine dining” sector, however what dining outlets will be there is still undetermined.

If you need a quick “do” while you are waiting for a flight or a friend to arrive, head to Toni & Guy Essensuals on the third floor. This is the very first branch of the stylish hair salon operating in an airport. Expect the same high standard of cutting, setting, dying and coloring services (B250-1,500) in addition to a nail spa.

For those in desperate need during business hours only, the Landside also features a Medical Center on the Ground Floor, open 8am-5pm (24-hour Medical Centers are located on Airside at Concourses A and G).

Money to Burn

After going through customs and security, you arrive at the Airside of the terminal building, which is divided into seven concourses, named A through G. Concourses A and B are designated for domestic passengers, while D through G are international. At the head of these concourses is an intersecting area called the Airside Center, which is kind of like a four-story mall of shops, airline offices, lounges and entertainment plazas.

Level one of Airside Center is the services area, which will mainly be dedicated to airport staff. Level two is the arrival services area. Dedicated to passengers arriving, some after a long flight, the shops on this level are laid out with a “walk-through” concept. Levels three and four are dedicated to departure services—this is where most of the shopping and entertainment action will be located. Though it’s still largely under construction at the moment, they are planning big things here, including a business center, bars, restaurants, game rooms, salons, shower rooms and even a dentist and fitness center. Here are some of the other planned highlights.

While it’s confirmed that there will be a movie theater on the second floor in the transit passenger lounge, no film providers (SF, EGV, etc.) have stepped forward to claim it. By the time Suvarnabhumi is open, with luck, passengers will have something to watch other than UBC.

A spa being built on the second floor is rumored to be run by Sareerarom—yes, the same as the one on Thonglor.

An 80-room hotel called The Miracle by Louis’ Tavern Day Room will be located inside the passenger hall on the third floor. There, you can take a rest from the long haul flight before you hop off to another continent. Room rates are not yet finalized, but the minimum rental is four hours.

OK, so you have a couple hours to kill but you don’t want to get a room. A Suvarnabhumi insider tipped us for the best place to catch a quick cat nap: a comfort zone on the transit deck on the second floor. There, some unmarked seats are available in the dimmed light for a quick 40 winks.

Shopping outlets will abound in the Airside Center, offering everything from international brands to duty free items to OTOP products. Jim Thompson has confirmed that it will run a branch of its outlet at the airport. DHC, the Japanese cosmetic brand, will open its very first airport branch in Asia in the domestic terminal area. In addition, Volare, a sister branch of Zenotti, is planning to set up shop in concourse D next to the duty free pick up counter. Don’t lose face to those farang!

An Affordable Airport?

Luckily, the management of Suvarnabhumi has realized that the price of food and drink at Don Muang is ridiculously overpriced, and they have actually made an effort to tone things down a bit. As of now, airport management has stated that all food and drink after customs (Airside) will not exceed 25% over the product’s normal price. Along the same lines, King Power and Thai Commercial Bank have joined forces to offer a Suvarnabhumi Cash Card, coming in two denominations: B50,000 and B3,000. The 50K card gets you a 10% bonus and free limousine service from your place to the airport four times a year. You also get a 5-20% discount from King Power shops both at Suvarnabhumi and throughout Thailand. That may not sound like much but hey, you’re gonna need it—airport taxes are going up in February.

What is Pan-Afro Electro?
It’s like a fusion between Detroit techno, minimal African percussion and traditional house music. It’s all about the sophistication and simplicity of an arrangement that makes it Pan-Afro Electro. The electronic part is the Western contribution and the minimalist Afro rhythms are the African part. Together it makes unusual but special tunes.

What can Bangkok expect from your set?
Honestly, it might sound arrogant but I don’t have a “bad” song in my record box—and if we have a good crowd, I can sure keep the energy moving. I’m not going to play just one style but move around with lots and lots of energy. Expect great music, Bangkok.

How long have you been DJing?
As far as I remember, I started DJing when I was 11 years old, but I won’t tell you how old I am now. It was sometime in the 1980s.

Have you been to any gigs in Bangkok?
Of course, many times. From gigs on the islands to RCA, from the clubs to after hour parties. Personally, I think gigs here lack of variety. For example, RCA has a particular sound—there’s a big room with commercial dance songs and commercial hip-hop. Whereas when you go to Bed or Q Bar, which are smaller, you have more variety—you could hear trance, electronica and different kinds of hip-hop. But I think there are more choices out there and changes are coming soon.

What was your best gig so far?
As a DJ, I would say the best was at Club Yellow in Tokyo on New Year’s Eve, 2003. That was my best party, so far.

Who was your inspiration to be a DJ?
Good question. Umm… I was born in Nigeria and there was a DJ performing there on TV called Alex Condi. He was very cool and he made people dance. There was nothing else but him, playing the turntable. It was a strange concept. As a kid, I used to think he was a god. That made me want to be a DJ.

If Bangkok were a type of music, what would it be?
If Bangkok were music, it would be some kind of high-energy music or trance. You can feel the high energy everywhere.

Some say hip-hop is just a trend for now that will go out of style soon. What do you think?
Nah. Absolute nonsense. Every kind of music changes its style. That’s like saying rock n’ roll is going to go away. It just evolves.

What’s good about a DJ career?
Every good thing I have came from DJing. But if you’re talking about the “sex, drugs and rock n’ roll” thing, I don’t do it anymore. If you have some girls waiting for you in every town you stop in, when you have to go back to play in that place again, you are going to have big problems. I just focus on the music, that’s all.

What are the pros and cons of being a dog walker?
If you love dogs, there are only pros. You get to spend time with lots of lovely dogs, which is priceless, and of course you get paid too!

What are the qualifications for being a dog walker?
Basically, you have to be a dog lover. Some experience with your own dog is a plus; it teaches you about dog body language and makes things a lot easier. Sometimes fitness is also important because a huge dog can end up walking you instead of the other way around. Being patient is also a must. A dog can be stubborn, like a child; it won’t do what you want it to do.

What is the worst-case scenario in dog walking?
If the dog gets excited and runs off. It can be hit by a car or get lost. If that happens, don’t chase it and don’t panic. Call the dog’s name. Actually, people on the street are a very good help.

What are the benefits of dog walking?
First, it’s a kind of exercise that you can control. Second, it’s quality time between you and your dog. And third, your dog learns how to socialize with others, so it won’t get over-excited when you bring it out.

What if I don’t have time to walk my dog?
You have to sacrifice some of your time, at least 20 minutes a day, to play with your dog. Games or whatever, try to play with him, make him jump or run. I’m sure that your dog will love playing with you.

To: Nathan
From: A2O
Subject: Life is suck

Hi there!
Lo-o-o-o-ng time no see. How r u? Hope everything is good with u. I’m OK…. Well, actually I’m not OK. I have a lot on my mind. Don’t laugh, but remember all those times I gave you a hard time and asked, “How the hell can you be gay?” Well, you guessed it: I think I’m gay. I mean, I know I’m gay. I’ve known for some time but it’s a BIG BIG step for me to come out of the closet. I feel so uncomfortable. I dunno! Sometime I wish I wasn’t gay at all. But then I feel so stretched having to hide my true self. U know what I mean? Maybe I wasn’t gay before, but that doesn’t matter because I realize what I am now. The big “G” word: Gay! Or maybe the “F” word: Fag! 555. Was it as hard for you as it is for me? My friends here haven’t been very supportive. I dunno. Should I just force my gayish-ness down their throats—or push it back down inside me and get back on the straight track? No, can’t do that. I know what I need/want to do, but wish it would be easier. What do you think, dude?
Luv,
A2O (About 2 Out)

To: A2O
From: Nathan
Subject: Re: Life is suck

Hi A2O. I’m very good; thanks for asking. And welcome to my team! Yeah, “life is suck”—but not always. Seems like you have changed a lot since I last saw you. Well, you came to the right person. I can’t tell you exactly what to do, but you know I’ve been there and have somehow managed to live happily ever after. Sometimes. Coming out of the bloody cramped closet requires a lot of thought. I’m sure that many people have told you how bad it sucks being gay in Mango City. OK. There are stereotypes about gays here just like anywhere else, but here they aren’t as strong and they don’t matter as much. For the most part we’re accepted so long as we’re not too gay. This society was set up for men and women, and it’s dominated by men—straight men—but we can make it big here, and we are valued. The gay “charm” or whatever is popular and we have lots of friends and lots of respect among straights. Jing mai ah!

So it’s great that you’re gay. I think everyone wants to be gay these days. There are so many reasons. For one, we decide what is cool, man! Have you noticed how we always do things ahead of everyone else? (jing jing) Even if something looks ridiculous, somebody will pick it up sooner or later—usually later. So we’re the unofficial trendsetters. Jing pa!

Another reason it’s great to be gay is because you have more time. Not because you don’t do anything but because you don’t have to worry about a family or kids. So you have plenty of time for yourself, na. Chances are you’ll have more money as well because your savings are spent only on yourself. So you’ll have more for eating and drinking and shopping and travel. A great life, isn’t it?

People come to us because we’re sex experts. Both straight guys and girls come to us for advice. Really, diamonds aren’t a girl’s best friend—a gay man is! Just ask all the straight women married to gay men—we make great husbands! The great thing about us is that we’re in touch with both our femme and our macho side—all in one body! And we might have even tried both, if you know what I mean. Cool, no?

We’re the kings (and queens) of “out of the box.” We’re constantly pushing the envelope of what is acceptable and what is cool. Why do you think there are so many of us in advertising? Look at all the gays you see on TV and in other media. Gays are in the spotlight now more than ever. And our “pink dollar” is something marketers constantly have their sights on.

Being gay you’ll always have plenty of friends. We can be just as competitive as straight men, but in the end we’re lovers, not fighters. Khun Nikom, Chairman of Bangkok Rainbow Organization, told me that he had yet to witness a fight result from one gay stepping on another gay’s foot. Instead we exchange phone numbers. Jing jing, na.

Those are just a few reasons of the top of my head why gay is great. There’s always a bright side, if you really look for it. Let me know if I can help you more.

xxx,
Nathan

To: Nathan
From: A2O
Subject: Our team

Hi, nat’
Thanks for your oh-so positive thoughts. I agree with you, mostly. But what do I do now to leave my cozy closet? Could you give me a couple tips? And how do you deal with stereotypes about gay people?

Luv,
A2O

To: A2O
From: Nathan
Subject: Re: Our team

Hi!! You’re such a curious boy, hah! Yes, there are things that people think about gays that are not nice and not true. However, luv, all you have to do is prepare yourself for those stereotypes. The best way is to go straight at them, like you’re not afraid—because you’re not!

First, you’ve got to look the part. Feel free to overdress. Just watch Queer Eye for a Straight Guy on DVD and then you’ll understand everything. This is why gays are always on the party list. No matter where you shop—even JJ or Pratunam—you’ll need to stand out with your fab outfit. You should dress a bit strange, but on the hiso side of strange.

You’ll also want to sound the part. Say what’s on your mind. And say it loudly. People say that gays are pak maa, but we just tell it like it is. No bullshit, just straight from the bottom of our hearts. Or maybe just straight from the bottom.

They stereotype us as “bitchy” or “smart-ass.” But we call it attitude. Maybe it makes some people feel uncomfortable, but otherwise they would make us feel uncomfortable. Which sounds better to you? Besides, we get better service this way, because they don’t want to piss us off.

There must be something in our gay genes—or maybe our jeans—that make us naturally talented with languages. Our oral skills are unparalleled. When gays describe something, we know how to spice up our language so it’ll be memorable and make an impression.

Well, A2O, I hope this has been helpful for you. More later. I’ve gotta get back to work. See you…

Luv,
Nathan

To: A2O
From: Nathan
Subject: Re: Re: Our team
Attachment: gay type.doc gay test.doc

Hi there
Phew! What a hectic schedule. I know last time I told you about changing threats to opportunities and promised to give you more points of view. Here are a couple.

Most gays know how to dance, pole dance, lap dance and, umm, strip tease (theoretically). OK, not all but at least most clearly gay guys dance like he/she was a choreographer for music videos. If you go around pubs and bars around Bangkok, you will see guys who dance too good to be straight. Call them “dancing queens” or “dancing queers,” this has led to the prig nam pla stereotype: When gays go out, they always express themselves at a maximum level. Well, we do, luv. That’s why “gay nights” are always the most fun—and the cooler straights know this. And that’s why, even in groups of mostly straights, we rainbow people are colorful sidekicks.

I know that we pink people have more pressure than others, but pressure is what turns coal into diamonds. Who wants to be coal? Not me!

xxx,
Nathan

P.S. I know you’re sure, but for fun, I made up a little “gay or not” test for you. Take it over afternoon tea some time. Or at the sauna.

What type are you?

The Diva
Confident to the point of arrogance now that the closet is far, far away. Some of your friends call you mama, je, or big sister. You can make fun of everything and everyone. You have the talent of Ajarn Yingsak, speak like Sorayuth and you can be Tomford for your gal friends, too.

The Cup Cake
You spend half your income on keeping your youthful look and it’s working. Though you’ll be hitting the big three-oh sooner or later, your face is frozen at 18. You have smoother skin than other men, and everyone envys you for your decade-younger look.

The PP (Protein Princes/Princes)
A.k.a. garm phoo. You spend loads of time in the gym admiring your biceps and triceps and take any opportunity to show them off. Two glasses of instant protein then it’s off to dance at DJ Station.

Government Contract
Mr. Mysterious. No one knows about your secret life outside of your little closet.

Camper
You still want to be a male, but your heart is 150% female. During the day you dress, act and behave like a lady-who-lunches; at night you’re a whore-in-training. You refer to your partner as “husband,” not “boyfriend.” You love to go to MNG sales, and to you a compliment is when someone calls you “suay“ not “lor.”

Are You Gay Test?

1. What song always makes you dance?
a. Music Lover (Marsha)
b. Bua Loi (Carabao)
c. What? Dance, never!

2. What comes into your mind when you see Paris Hilton?
a. Gosh, I like her handbag!
b. Like ya, love ya.
c. Damn! She’s hotter than in that clip!

3. Do most of your gal friends think that you really know and understand them?
a. Yes, how did you know?
b. Some yes and some no.
c. No, women are one of the universe’s great mysteries.

4. Do you wear colored shirts according to the season?
a. Yes, of course.
b. Not really. It depends on what color looks good on me.
c. Not unless my mom bought it for me.

5. Have you ever gone to a teen-idol concert and not been hit on by a girl?
a. No, but I refused them with my eagle eyes.
b. No, unless I go with my mates.
c. No, I hit on them first.

6. In your last dream about sex, were there other men in it?
a. I don’t want to talk about it. (That means yes, darling.)
b. Yes, in an orgy.
c. NO WAY!

7. Are you paranoid about your appearance when you go to parties?
a. Yes, image is the first thing on my mind.
b. Not really, but a good man should take care of himself.
c. Nah! I don’t care.

8. Do you ever feel like you want to dance the night away?
a. Yes, especially when a Madonna song is on.
b. Not really, except when I’m really wasted.
c. No, a beer and football is fine for me.

9. 2+7/8 x 14 = ?
a. WTF?
b. 15.75
c. I’m straight, when is this going to be over?

10. What action turns you on most?
a. Guy on guy.
b. Girl on guy.
c. Girl on girl.

Results
A = 3, B = 2, C = 1

0-10 points. You’re so straight you need more gay friends to spice up your life a little bit.

11-15 points. You’re friendly though somehow you still have a line drawn between gay and straight.

16-20 points. You’re a straight metrosexual guy and/or have a lot gay friends. You’re not so far away from the gay village. Make sure you pick the right path.

21-25 points. If you’re straight, you’re a fag stag and possibly just at the border of Gayland. Or you’re gay and still in the closet and using the metrosexual trend as cover.

26-30 points (or any points, if you answered “a” to #10). You’re so gay—or you’re a woman.

Helplines, Communities and Networking

Bangkok Rainbow Organization (49/29 Pradipath Soi 21, 02-618-3221, 09-039-1918, www.bangkokrainbow.org) arranges regular activities for gay people, most with an edutainment slant. Website is in Thai.

Long Yang Club is the “world’s largest network of gay Asian/non-Asian groups.” The Thailand chapter is based at @Richard restaurant (Silom Soi 2/1, next to Free Man Disco, 02-234-0459. Open daily 6pm-late) and holds monthly “Dinner with Friends” gatherings, usually on the last Friday of the month. For more information: www.longyangclub.org/Thailand/

Rainbow Sky Association of Thailand (5/F 1 Panjapath Bldg., Soi Pat Pong 1, Silom rd., 02-632-6956/-7. www.fasiroong.org) promotes understanding between straights and gays and promotes role models for the new generation. The association also organizes monthly activities not only in Bangkok but throughout Thailand.

Sai Sa Bai Jai (02-235-4754/-5, 10am-10pm.) Helpline focusing on HIV and other health concerns and gay issues.

Silom Clinic (3/F, Bangkok Christian Hospital, Silom Rd. 02-634-2917. Open Tue-Sat 4-8pm) is a joint Thai and US effort, offering free blood tests (HIV and STDs) for men only (no transgender).

www.fridae.com Singaporean website with news, networking and events. The annual “Nation” parties must be seen to be believed. The last one was held in Phuket and plenty of punters attended the three-day bash. It was such a ball, in fact, that they’re returning to the Pearl of the Andaman Oct 20-22. From July onward, the first 500 Thais can buy a ticket for the special price of B3,500—try Babylon (Sathorn Soi 1, 02-679-7984/-5) or Café 4 (Silom Soi 4, 02-632-8013).

www.gyent.com A local, English-language website that aims to be center of the universe for the Bangkok gay community. Modeled after fridae.com, there are listings and networking but not such an emphasis on parties.

www.lesla.com Thai-language website for girl-on-girl news, webboards, parties, etc.

www.thailandout.com One of the few gay websites where you won’t find titillating photos (too bad). Numerous Thai-language webboards divided by interest; to post you’ll need to register.

www.thqn.net Thai Queer Network is a local information-only site with news in Thai about all things gay from around the world.

Queer made it Hot

Bling
If you think it was rappers who started this trend, think again. Elton John was wearing huge diamond earrings for concerts back in his golden era (“do you remember when rock was young?”), long before baby gangstas hit the scene.

Earrings
Perhaps the best example of a gay trend that made it big is earrings on men. Twenty years ago straight men didn’t wear earrings, and gay men did it partly to identify themselves as gay. But look at Siam Square now—almost every man and boy has a little piece of metal plugged in his earlobe.

Mens’ Cosmetics
It wasn’t the ladies and it wasn’t the metrosexuals. Who made makeup on men hot? Gay men, of course. Women knew enough to use cosmetics to combat the effects of aging, but it was gay men who made it mainstream. Even our caretaker prime minister applies night cream. He probably carries lip balm in his man purse and applies ultra-strong sunblock before leaving his home, as well.

The Manicure
Until recently most straight men didn’t pay much attention to their nails—or at least they didn’t admit to it. Manicures and pedicures were the territory of women and gay men. Not any more. Now spas all over Bangkok see straight male customers coming in for a polish (and we don’t mean a “happy ending”).

Tight and Supertight Clothing
A decade ago, a man wearing a tight t-shirt was branded as gay. Now Zara and Levi’s are making jeans that fit tight and low, and who’s wearing them? You, straight man!

Waxing
Once the domain of drag queens about to don their gowns and hit the stage, waxing is now being marketed to men in many leading gyms and spas. We’re looking forward to the day the Brazilian makes the same leap.

Divas
Without their fervent gay followings, Madonna, Kylie and Marsha would be gone with the wind. Even Mimi was able to stage a comeback—only after she realized that “We Belong Together.” Paa Tina should take note.

The Metrosexual
We’ll be damned if we’re going to forget this one. Every guy who turns himself from shit to shine, who wears night cream, who knows how to dress and take care of himself, is following in the long tradition pioneered by gay men. It’s good to see all that hard work is paying off: Now if we can only get him to explore other facets of his feminine side…