The NegativeThe Spin More violence. The deterioration of the situation in the South and the increase in terrorist attacks in Bangkok. Also, the Slapfest Index, which measures how many times women got slapped on prime time television from 6-8pm, showed a real spike in September.Better cocktails. It used to be really hard to get anything more complex than a screwdriver outside Soi 11. Now, every noodle stall has a mixologist consulting for them, and you can order a yadong-infused Old Fashioned with your bamee.

Imagine living in a world with only BBC, TV Cinq, Thai channels and Star Movies. A world pretty much cut off from the real world. Well, here’s the shocker: that’s the world many people live in. Some people don’t even have Star Movies, which is a shame, because The Hills Have Eyes 2 is a classic.Good thing there’s this new trend in Thailand where we remake all those great shows that don’t get aired here. It started with Samak trying to give us a taste of Martha Stewart. Then the PAD put on an hour-long impression of Steven Colbert.

Special lecturer at Thammasat University Pongthep Thepkanjana, deputy leader of the Thai Rak Thai Party, was recently criticized for including the following question on a final exam: “If you were a judge and you were invited by coup makers to work for them for a salary more than you receive now, will you accept the work or not and why?”In his defense, the chairman of the university’s council of lecturers insisted that Pongthep was within his rights as a lecturer to include ethical and political questions on the test.

What can we buy with $2 million?• One million plates of chicken rice to feed a whole province in Kenya.• Two million cheap paintbrushes for our starving local artists.• Ten thousand tickets to see Sir Ian McKellan on stage.• One thousand glistening gold taps to beautify our public toilets.• One million packs of peanuts to feed the monkeys.• Five George W.

Following a series of unfortunate the events that have been plaguing Singapore and the world recently—the Virginia Tech shootings, the Sungei Pandan drowning, and another Ah Lian winning Miss Singapore Universe—we decided to consult our crystal ball for some updates on future disasters, and perhaps take some action steps to avoid them. Here’s what we’re told:• The government’s attempt to become hip reaches its logical conclusion.

In 1993, the United Nations General Assembly proclaimed May 3 World Press Freedom Day. On this day we pay tribute to the men and women around the world who risk life, limb and liver to bring us the news along with the latest updates on Britney’s rehab.Here at BK Magazine, we’re marking the occasion with a memorial service for former comrades followed by canapés and then a naked midnight swim.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it is time once again to test your knowledge of current events with this month’s news quiz, which is guaranteed to be especially—but not gratuitously (never!)—sexy.Why did the Thai Rak Thai Party move its headquarters?a. An astrologer told them to.b. Lower operating costs for the new building.c. Tired of having to nag the cleaners about dirty bathrooms.d. The new location is sexier.Which of the following proposals was submitted to the cabinet?a. Ban on using mobile phones while driving.b. Random blocking of websites.c. Pornography for pandas.d.

Singapore ministers will be getting a hefty pay rise as part of a controversial ministerial salary hike that has infuriated many. MM Lee, who stands to earn at least $3 million with the hike, said in its defense that Singapore needs “an extraordinary government with extraordinary government officers to support it.” In coming up with the ministerial and civil service pay rise, the government created a wage formula where a higher percentage of pay is now linked to performance.

With the advent of the Media Development Authority (MDA) revising its media code of conduct which could possibly result in tighter censorship rules on electronic and digital content on top of current broadcasting and print sectors, we imagined how an excerpt from a recent mrbrown blog (www.mrbrown.com) might have been edited:Friday, March 30, 2007Behold our new Toilet Bowl Stadium!

Here’s another report from our 15-year-old international school correspondent, Pancake.Hey guys! What’s up?!! Happy New Year and all that. Damn (ooh, can I say that here?), it’s sooo hot these days. I mean I can, like, hardly breathe! I heard on the radio when me and my friend Tik were on our way to a midnight sale that this year will be the hottest ever in Thailand since, like…I don’t know…dinosaurs or something. Remember, I warned you all about the ozone!So I guess this is a good time to be splashing around and being wet. I’m fully not into it, though.