Located on an easily overlooked soi across from Burger King, Goloso Italian Deli (1025/13 Ploenchit Rd., near Central Chitlom, 02-655-0565. Open Mon-Fri 10am-7pm and Sat 10am-1pm. BTS Chid Lom) has a nondescript storefront but is in fact a hidden gem for Italian food lovers. Run by Massimo Ducci, the former general manager at Bar Italia, Goloso began as a wholesaler to Italian restaurants throughout Thailand; his list of clients now numbers 70 and extrends to Chiang Mai, Phuket and Samui.

“My main business is importing Italian deli products. Many chefs always ask me for samples, so Goloso is like an exposition for chefs and other customers,” he explains.

Made in Italy

Everything in the store is imported from Italy, with shipments coming in every Wednesday and Friday: olive oil (B590-700) from north and central Italy; cherry tomatoes (B700/kg) from the south; and Parma ham (B2,500/kg)—Goloso’s bestseller—from the north.

As you would expect, most people come for the selection of cheese and cold cuts, but you can also find vegetables—artichokes, Radicchio Trevigiano, Tarocco oranges—and fresh jam, grissini (breadsticks) and rice at Goloso.

Cheese & Wine

Though the shop is filled with Italian items, the majority of the customers are Thai, not farang. “Thais are nice customers, and many of them come for the cheese. It isn’t true that Thais don’t like cheese, as people claim,” Massimo says with a smile.
The mozzarella (B450/250g) is especially popular. A person favorite of Massimo is Barolo cheese (B220/g), a unique delicacy he proudly recommends. This intense cheese is refined in must from the grapes used for Barolo wine, and the two complement each other perfectly.

As a service to his customers, he offers Italian wines (from B640 to B16,000) at Goloso, but they are selected from local suppliers rather than imported directly.

Just Like Gianni

If you come to the store and don’t know what to buy, Massimo is happy to give you advice. “I have to ask the customer his purpose: if someone needs something fresh that day, I suggest buying slices of Pama ham or salami. If someone stays far away from Bangkok, perhaps he could buy some salami and slice it himself. He can keep it in the refrigerator for a month.”

If you think Italian cuisine is complicated or difficult to prepare, Massimo will show you products that can be easily put together. For example, you could make a gourmet meal out of truffle tagliatelle (B350) and Sugo all’ arrabbiata (B260), a tomato-based pasta sauce. Just boil the pasta and mix in the sauce.
“You see? Italian food is very simple,” Massimo insists. “Thai food is much more difficult to cook.”

Want to try your hand at cooking? Whether you aspire to be a chef or simply want to impress your date, Bangkok has something on offer.

Blue Elephant

The chef: Led by founding partner/director Nooror Somany Steppe, a team of professional chefs steps forward to teach and share their first-hand experience.
The class: There are morning (8:45am-12:30pm) and afternoon (1-5pm) courses on offer Mon-Sat. But we highly recommend you wake up early and join the morning class since you get to join the chef in a trip to the Bang Rak market, where you are shown how to pick fresh ingredients. At the theory class, the chef demonstrates how to cook the dishes of the day and hand out the recipe booklet. Then it’s time to put on an apron and make your own 4-course meal to be eaten after class. Here, each student has their own table, stove and wok.
Best for: Well-heeled tourists who want to learn a few Thai recipes before heading back home and explore the local way of life without having to really slum it.
The price: B2,800, inclusive of an apron, a certificate and a basket of herbal teas. There’s also a full-day vegetarian course on offer at B6,000.
Blue Elephant, 233 South Sathorn Rd., 02-673-9353/-8. BTS Surasak. [email protected], www.blueelephant.com.

Chef’s Club

The chef: Most of the classes are led by Chef’s Club head chef, Chef Ing. There’s also a team of chefs who are experts in different cuisines to assist her.
The class: Limited to eight people, the class is small and casual. The airy kitchen features a U-shaped counter, enabling every participant to get a good glimpse of what the chef is doing. The menu changes daily from Japanese and French to Thai and desserts.
Best for: Shopaholics who want to learn a few recipes.
The price: Ranges from B1,800-2,500 depending on the menu.
Chef’s Club, 4/F, Siam Paragon, Rama 1 Rd., 02-129-4558, BTS Siam. [email protected].

La Gritta

The chef: Chef Alessio Loddo has hosted this cooking class for almost a year, but his contract is going to expire at the end of this month. This might be your last chance to learn from him.
The class: It’s often held on the last Wednesday of each month, 9:30-11:30am, but the schedule can be changed at the chef’s convenience. It would be wise to call and check in the middle of a month. This popular class is usually bustling with 18-20 students. It begins with a demonstration, then the budding chefs are divided into three groups of six. Bowls of ingredients, knives and cutting boards are provided for each group. However, there’s only one stove at the chef’s table, which means it takes a while for each group to take turns cooking.
Best for: Guys who want to make moves on the cute Japanese ladies who dominate the class.
The price: B1,450, inclusive of apron, certificate and lunch buffet.
La Gritta, Sukhumvit Soi 19, 02-255-7350, [email protected].

Mandara Academy

The chef: The cooking class is hosted by various spa cuisine experts, with Chef Apple at the helm. She not only teaches you how to cook but also explains the effects each ingredient has upon your body and shares tips for cooking balanced meals.
The class: The course is on offer daily, 9:30am-1pm. Before getting your hands dirty, you get to indulge in a 60-minute Bali Floral Oil Massage at Mandara Spa. Chef Apple is enthusiastic and chatty throughout the class as she leads the students through a hands-on, step-by-step cooking lesson. Recipes are healthy and easy enough to be done at home. Classes are small, from 1-6 people.
Best for: Health-conscious, weight-watching ladies.
The price: B6,000, inclusive of an apron, a certificate and a recipe booklet.
Mandara Academy, Bangkok Marriott Resort & Spa, 257 Charoennakorn Rd., 02-476-0022 ext. 1416, www.marriottdining.com.

Rossini’s

The chef: Chef Gaetano Palumbo, who just donned his chef’s hat at Rossini’s last October, shares the tricks of his trade to cook down-to-earth, “full-flavored” Sicilian cuisine.
The class: The cooking area has moved from its original spot in the working Rossini’s kitchen to a corner on the left side of the restaurant with only one cooking booth. The class is held on every Friday, 10:30am-1:30pm. However, it’s more like joining a chef’s table than a cooking class since you get to watch the chef (and maybe two volunteers from a group) closely as he prepares a 4-course meal. On the good side, Chef Gaetano is tireless in sharing everything from how to open a caper can to the proper way to peel tomatoes.
Best for: Those who prefer to stagger away full of facts and food, without actually cooking.
The price: B1,590, inclusive of an apron, a certificate and a 4-course lunch of the recipes you learn prepared professionally.
Rossini’s, Sheraton Grande Sukhumvit, 250 Sukhumvit Rd., 02-649-8364. BTS Asok.

Tsu & Nami

The chef: Having worked in Tokyo, New York and Los Angeles, Chef Aki can explain traditional Japanese cooking well and in fluent English.
The class: Packed with the expats, the class is held from 8:50am-1:30pm on the first Saturday of each month. Students have to move around to learn how to cook main courses at Tsu, appetizers in a hot kitchen, sake cocktails at the sake bar and teppanyaki at Nami. The upcoming classes are on Apr 7 and Mar 5. Limited to 12 students, the seats usually are booked very quickly, so call ahead well in advance.
Best for: Those planning a sushi party and who don’t mind getting their hands sticky while learning how to make rolls.
The price: B1,900, inclusive of an apron, a certificate, a souvenir bag,
a picture with Chef Aki and lunch at Nami.
Tsu & Nami, JW Marriott, 4 Sukhumvit Soi 2, 02-656-7709.

Princess Charming

Dear Diary,
It really is hard to believe how suddenly my life has changed. At the risk of sounding like a newly crowned beauty pageant princess, lolling in her enormous five-star bed with tiara still attached to her head—it’s like a dream.

I don’t have a lot in common with those pretty ladies: I don’t care for kids and I’m not concerned with world peace. After all, I’m just a street dog. But I’m a good breed, a cocker spaniel. Let me paint you a picture: I’m a five-month-old male puppy, mostly white with some brown on my face and ears. I don’t mean to brag—Thais like humble dogs as much as modest people—but there’s no avoiding the fact that I’m damn cute.

Still, life hasn’t always been easy for this cute little canine. It’s something of a Cinderella story, actually. My mom was dumped by an uncaring owner, so my three sisters and I have been raised at a place called Home For Handicapped Animals Foundation (15/1 Moo 1 Soi Pramahakarun, Tiwanon Rd., 02-584-4896, 02-961-5625. Open daily 8am-5pm)—a kind of puppy orphanage. Just this morning, as I was hanging out with my sis, a pretty girl called Khun Nu visited the foundation and adopted me. Khun Nu was like a talent scout searching for the next rising star at Siam Square—and the rising star today was me! She spotted me rolling around with my siblings and said, “Look at that cute cocker spaniel!” I stopped and looked at her, wagging my tail. Finally, somebody recognized me as the star that I am. And she even knew my breed. What a smart girl.

Excitedly,
That Cute Cocker Spaniel

A Street Dog by Any Other Name

Dear Diary,
Khun Nu took me to her big white house and let me play in the yard. She told everyone that my name was Kimchi because I’m stinky. “Besides, I think Kimchi’s a cool name,” Khun Nu told her mother, “and I want him to be trendy like me.”

“Trendy”? I wasn’t sure I liked the sound of that. As it turns out, the first step toward being trendy is taking a shower. I didn’t like the wet part much, but it was worth it afterward when Jaew, the maid, dried my fur with a hairdryer. Wow, what a great invention!

Clean and relaxed, I was just about to fall asleep when I heard Khun Nu on the phone. “Can you pick us up at 3?” she asked. “I need to take my dog to the vet.”

After that I couldn’t sleep.

Apprehensively,
Kimchi

V-Day

Dear Diary,
As promised, a dog taxi from Big Move (10 Soi Pattnakang 20, Pattanakan Rd., 02-720-0507, 06-399-9780. Mon-Fri 8am-9pm, Sat-Sun 8am-12am. www.dogstaxi.com) arrived today to pick up Khun Nu and me and take us to Thonglor Pet Hospital (205/19-21 Soi Thong Lor (between Thonglor 9 and 11), Sukhumvit Rd., 02-712-6301-4, www.thonglorpet.com. Open 24 hours). The vet there told me I was a lucky dog and very healthy, but he gave me vaccines anyway.

Did they hurt? Sure. I’m a puppy, not a robot. But I’ll soon be a big dog, and I have to be strong. As a reward for my bravery, Khun Nu bought me a little soccer uniform from the hospital’s gift shop. She put it on me right away.
Life is good with my new owner, but even with her constant company, I get lonely for other dogs. I wish I still had my siblings to play with.

Missing my friends,
Kimchi

Very Fit, Very Firm

Hello Diary,
This morning Khun Nu saw me trying to catch my own tail and realized that I needed some dog-to-dog interaction. (But I like playing with my tail!) She brought me to Dog Sport Club (777/1 Moo 11, Soi Nuanchan 36, Nuanchan Rd. (behind Kokkram police station), 02-519-3737, 01-776-3579, www.dogsportclub.com. Open daily 9am-6pm), where I can run, swim and wrestle with other dogs to my heart’s content. After a tour of the three-rai grounds, the generous Khun Nu signed me up for an annual membership (B2,500) and let me spend some time running in the “off-leash zone.” We even played this game called “fetch”: Khun Nu throws a bone, I bring it back, she says, “Good boy!” and I say “Good girl!” (The woman doesn’t have a clue what I’m saying, though.)

When I had worn her out, my master sat down to rest and I made friends with a Yorkshire terrier called Angelina. We left the sports club with Angelina and her owner and went to check out a new pet-friendly complex called Ozano (307 Sukhumvit 39, 02-259-2786. Open daily 7am-12am). While Khun Nu and her friend went to the spa, Angelina and I were pampered at the Aqua Dog Salon & Spa (307 Sukhumvit 39, 02-259-2786. Open daily 10am-9pm). Dirty after my romp at the club, I had a shower, mud treatment, haircut and massage. Angelina talked the whole time about all the other salons she had been to. “You know at The World Pet Angle (40/736 Moo 10 Soi Nuanchan, Klonglamjeak Rd., 02-509-2001, 02-509-2039. Open daily 9am-8pm), you can soak in a warm bath for half an hour. Of course I don’t stay that long, but it’s quite an experience. Every dog I know has done it—I can’t believe you’ve never been to a spa before!” she yammered. I didn’t tell her that, three days ago, I was a scrappy orphan with no owner to take me for walks, let alone to the spa.

Overwhelmed,
Kimchi

Strike a Pose

Dear Diary,
Feelin’ fine after my day of beauty and fitness, I went with Khun Nu (as if I had a choice) to Doggie Bag (370 Sukhumvit 39, 02-259-2786. Open daily 10am-9pm), a shop that sells everything a dog lover could want, from canine clothing to coffee mugs. Khun Nu chose a black tux that made me look like Johnny Depp on Oscar Night. And I had to get into it in a hurry, because Angelina was waiting for us at a pet photography studio called Buddy-Puppy (Suanlum Night Bazzar, Pet Zone next to BEC TERO Hall, 01-720-0994. Open Tue-Fri 4-11pm, Sat-Sun 1-11pm), where we posed for some portraits to commemorate the day we met.

I know I’ll sleep well tonight—after an action-packed day, I’m mellowing out to the sweet sounds of Dog Radio Thailand (01-933-8055, www.dogradiothailand.com. Online daily 8-10pm).

Sleepy and Satisfied,
Kimchi

What A Life!

Hey Diary,
What’s up? Man, I feel like a whole new dog. This morning Khun Nu woke me up to show me the package that came in the mail from eluxury.com—for me, a Louis Vuitton leash monogrammed with my new initials (B1,200), and for her, a matching sac chien—that’s “dog carrier” (B1,500).

Wanting to show off our new accessories, we headed to Pet Park (Garden Mall, next to Seacon Square and Royal Princess Srinakarin Hotel, 02-721-8222. Open daily 10am-8pm), where I played at the pet playground. When I had to answer nature’s call, Khun Nu and Jaew were ready to clean up after me with plastic bags provided by the park. Of all the new experiences I’ve had over the last few days, this has to be one of the strangest. When I see humans picking up their dogs’ poop I wonder if I’ve misunderstood the hierarchy of the master-pet relationship.

I worked up a good appetite running at the park, and I guess the humans were able to forget the poop-scooping incident, because they ate a lot, too. We had a nice lunch at Chom Suan (Sukhumvit 16, 02-663-2169. Open Mon-Sat 11am-3:30pm), a pet-friendly restaurant owned by the singer P’Pu Anchalee, who walked around with her own dog while we were there. Just as I was thinking about how skinny she was, Khun Nu must have read my mind because she said that P’Pu spends a lot of time exercising. I wonder if she goes to the Pet Park?

Curiously,
Kimchi

A Day at the Beach

Hello there,
This weekend Khun Nu is taking me to Cha-Am beach. I’m so excited! I’ve never been to the beach before. Khun Nu says we can take walks on the sand and even go swimming in the ocean. But we won’t be leaving behind the luxuries I’ve grown accustomed to over the past week; while Khun Nu stays at the hotel building, I’m staying at the Pet Resort (Regent Cha-Am, 849/21 Petchkasem Rd., Cha-Am, Petchburi. 032-451 240-9). Room service!

Hungrily,
Kimchi

Small Screen, Here I Come!

Dearest Diary,
Today I was watching TV and I saw a commercial for dog food and thought, I could act better than that silly shih tzu! (Shit tzu!) Maybe I should try my hand (paw) at acting. After all, I have some free time now that Khun Nu is back to work. Who knows, I might be bigger than Lassie.

Hopefully,
The Artist Formerly Known as Kimchi

Doggy Language

Veternarian Dr. Thitiporn Pliansamai explains what your pet means when (s)he…

barks and steps backward = feels insecure or threatened
barks and steps forward = feels angry and confident, as when facing an intruder
barks and wags its tail = happy or looking for attention; possibly sick
bites your hand lightly = looking for attention
drops its tail = surrender
howls after hearing other dogs howl = wants to mate or communicate with other dogs
howls when alone = feels lonely and wants your attention
growls and/or bares teeth = ready to fight or chase away an intruder
rubs itself against you = soliciting friendship, attention or possibly a good scratch
paws at you with front legs = wants attention or to play
scratches floor or door = wants to get out
tries to lick you on the mouth = saying hello or looking for food

Though the Korean wave is strong, even Dae Jang Geum-mania still can’t beat demands for Japanese fare in Bangkok. Unlike Japanese restaurants in Thailand that generously serve everything from sushi to domburi (chicken and egg on rice) under the same roof, restaurants in Japan are usually devoted exclusively to one type of fare. “Most restaurants are family-driven businesses specializing in one item, which is more cost efficient and easier to maintain good quality,” explains Chef Shiraishi Kikuo of Taihei at the Banyan Tree. Though our restaurants serve many items, sushi is one of the most recognizable and popular forms of Japanese cuisine. Because of high demand, not only have chain Japanese restaurants been growing fast, but the number of high-end Japanese eateries have also multiplied. The arrival of Tsu Nami, Koi, Taihei and Wasabi @ Q Bar ensure the trend. Before taking another bite, let’s learn a little bit more about sushi.

The Best Fish

“The best spot to get sushi is in front of the chef because it’s fresh,” Head Chef Akihiro Izumi of Tsu and Nami at the JW Marriot suggests. A good rule of thumb is to ask where the fish comes from before eating it. If it is imported from Hokkaido, Kyushi or Tokyo’s Tsukiji market, then it will most likely be good quality. “Most of the best fish from all over Japan comes into Tsukiji market because fisherman know they can sell it for a high price there,” Chef Akihiro says. He, Chef Shiraishi and David Lombardi, co-owner of Wasabi @ Q Bar, all import fish from Tsukiji for their restaurants.

Finger Food

Wash your hands with the moist towel they provide. You might not have known that Japanese traditionally eat sushi by hand. However, Chef Akihiro explains that nowadays, about 50% of people consider eating by hand to be unclean, so they eat with chopsticks instead.

The right way to eat sushi is to lightly put soy sauce on the fish side. “Don’t dip the rice into the sauce because it’s too salty,” Chef Akihiro recommends. Chef Shiraishi suggests, “Put the fish side on your tongue first, in order to taste the fish prior to rice.” Chef Akihiro adds, “Whenever sushi is served, eat quickly because the fish gets warm and dry. Japanese people use wasabi only when we eat sashimi because sushi already has wasabi between the rice and fish. But don’t worry, if you like spice go ahead and use extra wasabi.”

Rare Breeds

We usually picture sushi as vinegared rice topped with fresh sashimi, but in fact this Japanese dish comes in a variety of forms. When it is rolled and wrapped up with nori seaweed, it is called maki. Nigiri is pieces of raw fish over vinegared rice balls. Gunkan comes in a round shape wrapped with seaweed and topped with ingredients. Here in Bangkok, we have more varieties, some of which aren’t considered authentically Japanese, including the well-known California roll.

Sushi Don’ts

Head Chef Akihiro Izumi of Tsu Nami at the JW Marriott and Chef Shiraishi Kikuo of Taihei at the Banyan Tree reveal what most Japanese don’t do with sushi.

Don't pass food to another person with chopsticks. This act parallels the passing of the cremated bones of a deceased relative at a Japanese funeral.

Don't make wasabi soup with your soy sauce. Sushi chefs cringe at this spectacle. Wasabi paralyzes your palette and hides the subtle flavors of the raw fish. Dip (don't dunk) only the fish part—a little wasabi goes a long way.

Don't scrape rice from chopsticks.

Don't eat all the rice at once. Rather, return to it after tasting other dishes. If you order rice, you must finish it. You're not supposed to leave anything on your plate.

Don't eat the fatty items first. In Japan, the correct order is to go for the lighter pieces first (such as white fish), followed by the agaki (shellfish) and finally the fatty fish.

Brunch is such a great invention for those of us who can’t be bothered to leave our lovely beds for the most boring meal of the day, breakfast. Thankfully, a number of outlets around town now understand our needs and are making some intriguing offers.

Aldo’s

The Fare: This Mediterranean bistro serves standard brunch items. Appetizers come all the way from Europe: cold cuts and cheeses from France and Italy and Norwegian smoked salmon with homemade blinis. Eggs come in six styles, though you can have only one at a time. Served with potatoes and choice of pork sausage or crispy bacon. The set also includes bread, pastries and jams, fresh fruit and yogurt, soup and a drink.

The Deal: B550. Sun 11am-2pm.

The Scene: Sophisticated and luxurious with a nice view at poolside. The outdoor salas are fantastic.

The Site: 187 Sathorn Rd., 02-676-6969

Chesa Swiss

The Fare: Sorry, no fondue. The well-known Swiss dish is overshadowed by 26 choices at their buffet brunch created by Chef Thomas Nowa. Some of their highlights are traditional Swiss cheese, Raclette “wheel cheese” with baby potatoes, Rosti (Swiss “hash browns”), baked ham, Swiss macaroni, barley soup with vegetables, and Caesar salad made the Swiss way with Sprinz cheese. Dessert varies. You can try all 26 items but you have to finish them in four hours.

The Deal: B950. Sun 11am-3pm.

The Scene: Simple and homey with friendly service.

The Site: 5 Sukhumvit Soi 20, 02-261-6650

Coyote On Convent

The Fare: Mexican style with a heavy American Southwest influence (Tex-Mex). The brunch set limits you to one drink and one main course, but is served for seven hours, so there’s no rush to wake up. There are eight mains to choose from, including the basic El Americano (two eggs, Mexican potatoes and choice of chorizo sausage, smoked ham or smoked bacon), Eggs Benedict, Waffle Benedicto (jumbo waffle topped with spinach, poached eggs and smoked ham, then smothered in Hollandaise sauce) or Waffle Mariana (salmon instead of ham). A basket of corn and Jalapeno muffins comes with your main course. For a drink, select Sangria, House Margarita, Bloody Maria or fruit juice.

The Deal: B395. Sat-Sun 11am-6pm.

The Scene: Bright orange theme and Mexican style decoration.

The Site: 1/2 Sivadon Bldg., Convent Rd., 02-631-2325

Crepes & Co

The Fare: Crepes wins for the longest Sunday brunch at 15 hours. Its brunch set offers breakfast style dishes all day long: various kinds of bread, yogurt, a choice of cereals or muesli or khao tom, and salad, fruit, two eggs any style with toast, pancakes, side dishes and drinks. They have about 100 different selections of tea.

The Deal: B450. Sun 9am-midnight

The Scene: Warm and cozy in a friendly house with a garden.

The Site: 18/1 Sukhumvit Soi 12, 02-653-3990/-1

Fogo Vivo Brazilian Churrascaria & Bar

The Fare: Their buffet brunch is the same as their lunch menu, but a pasta station is added. The Brazilian bistro is generous with a wide selection. They have 15 types of salad, 9 dressings and of course the unique Churrascaria meats they are famous for, including tenderloin, veal, pork ribs, duck breast, salmon and homemade sausage. Side dishes, soups and desserts are also included.

The Deal: B620. Sun 11:30am-5pm

The Scene: Modern with cool mood lighting, contemporary furniture and lots of wood accents.

The Site: Basement & G/F, 973 Ploenchit Rd., 02-656-0384

La Gritta

The Fare: Contemporary Italian buffet. Many favorite Italian dishes appear here: pasta, spaghetti, pizza and seafood. Soup, dessert and drink are included.

The Deal: B490. Sun 11:30am-3pm

The Scene: Elegant with modish furniture.

The Site: Sukhumvit Soi 19, 02-255-7350

Wyndham Thai

The Fare: The elegant Thai/western restaurant has no set brunch deal, but does have a typical a la carte brunch menu: egg dishes (B190-250), pastas (B160-320), sandwiches (B120-150), yogurt (B120), fruit juice (B120), coffee (B120-220) and tea (B100-110). Wyndham Thai’s strength is high quality imported fish and meat. Unfortunately, no Thai dishes are included on their brunch menu.

The Deal: Prices vary from B120-320. Sat-Sun noon-4pm

The Scene: Chic Asian décor.

The Site: G/F Somerset Lake No 41, Sukhumvit Soi 16, 02-258-1783

How to Write a Book

....and Film, Album or Website

1 Have your own original idea. Competition among aspiring writers is fierce. A respectable publishing house like Matichon Books receives 30 submissions per month. How do you make your story stand out? Parnbua Boonparn, executive editor at Matichon, says, “At Matichon, we only consider stories with originality. If a new writer has a similar tone to other writers in the market, we recommend he find his own style.”

2. Come up with an outline. An outline helps you generate ideas, focus on what you really want to write and come up with the ever-important beginning and ending.

3. Keep Writing. You can’t be a writer if your ideas never come out on paper. “You can start by writing a diary and seeing what kind of topics you like to write about. This process will help you figure out your style, as well,” the Matichon Book executive editor advises.

4. Edit. “Reread your work. If even you don’t think it’s interesting, nobody else will,” offers Parinda Manusmonpri, editor of Naew Kwam Roosuekdee at Jamsai Publishing.

5. Get feedback and rewrite. “One of the best ways to get feedback is to post your writing online,” Parinda says. Popular websites include pantip.com and jamsai.com. After receiving comments from readers, you can reread your story and rewrite it.

6. Never give up. After receiving negative feedback, many aspiring writers decide to give up on writing as a career. Don’t. A key trait if you want to be a writer is patience. If at first you don’t succeed, edit and rewrite your story until you’re happy with it.

7. Whatever it takes. In Thailand, the best-selling books are written by celebrities. No-name writers have to find other ways to get published. The Matichon Book editor suggests sending an article or a feature to one of the Matichon publications. If your work is published, your next step is to try to be a regular contributor or even a columnist. Then you have a chance of being a pocketbook author. Another way to get published is to enter a writing contest—of course you’ll have to win something to attract the attention of publishers.

How to Sell a Book

1. Approach the right publisher. Figure out which publishing house is right for your book. For example, Feature Publishing and Matichon Publishing focus on informative books. “We don’t publish any books written by celebrities. We are looking for content that can entertain and inform. Aspiring writers should know a publishers’ culture before sending manuscripts to them,” says Parnbua, Matichon Book’s executive editor. On the other hand, Jamsai of Pearl and Bluebell Publishing look for light content such as romantic novels.

2. Prepare a pitch. Make an appointment with an editor of your choice and think of a good pitch to sell your book. “Be prepared. A writer must be able to tell a publisher why he needs to publish the book,” explains Parnbua.

3. Promote yourself. If you get a contract with a publisher that is a part of a big empire like Amarin Printing, Matichon or The Nation, you don’t need to worry about promotion because you will get interviewed by media in the empire. But if you release a book with a small publisher, a good way to receive coverage is to send your book to media that has book review columns. Also, find interesting angles about yourself and your book and create a press release. Send them to media outlets that match with your book. For example, if your book is about your adventures abroad, send it to travel magazines and travel sections in newspapers.

Directions

Information update

www.yes-wedo.com/publishing.htm A complete list of publishing companies and contact numbers

www.thaiwriter.org Updated news for those in the writing business by Thai Writer Association

www.praphansarn.com/new Updated news about writing contests

www.pantip.com/cafe/library Online community of readers and aspiring writers

ONLINE PUBLISHING

www.jamsai.com
www.bluebell-press.com
www.pearlpublishing.co.th
www.emotionway.com
www.yayee-yajai.com

Aspiring Writer Workshop

Four-day workshop taught by experienced editors and writers. B3,500. See details at amarintraining.com.

Writing Contests

Boondham Boonpring Award. Categories include feature stories, young adult stories and illustrated books for kids. Contact Thai Wattanapanit Publishing, 905 Soi 49 Rama III Rd., 02-683-3333

Crime & Mystery Fiction Contest. A contest for crime, mystery. Nanmee Book, 11 Sukumvit Soi 31, 02-662-3000 ext 4323

Nation Book Award. A contest for scientific books. Contact Nation Books 02-325-0432 or 02-325-5555 ext 3302. www.nationbook.com

Nai In Award. Categories include short story, novel and poetry. Contact 02-422-9999 ext 4141-4147. www.nain.com

Phan Waen Fah Award. Categories include political essays and poetry. Contact Thai Writer Association, 02-421-2302 (Applications accepted until August, 2006)

How to Make Movies

1. Focus on short film. Unless you’re filthy rich, you’ll have a tough time making a full-length feature film—the kind that is screened in theaters. Making a short (and low budget) film is a realistic way to show studios what you can do. Pakpoom Wongpoom (The Shutter), Chukiat Sakweerakul (Khon Pi Pisaj) and Kongdej Jaturanrasmee (Cherm) are well-known directors who made short films before they hit the big time. “Making a movie requires a large amount of money, and nobody wants to risk their money on a no-name director. A short film is another way to add to your credits and at the same time demonstrate what your style is,” says Kongdej.

2. Play by the rules. There are many short film contests. Decide which one you want to enter, because each contest has different rules. For example, for the Fat Short Film Contest, you need to produce a film related to a song; for the Thai Film Foundation Short Film Contest, your film can’t exceed 30 minutes.

3. Create a script. A good script is the base for a good film. Be original. Don’t copy foreign films like many professional filmmakers like to do. (You can do that later after you’re famous.) Also, remember that later your script can be extended to become a feature. For example, Kongdej’s Sayew was originally entered in a short film script contest.

4. Write with a low budget in mind. Be realistic. Figure out which locations and which actors you can use for free or pay little money. Kongdej spent a measly B2,000 on his 19-minute short Jeng and received an award from the Thai Film Foundation in 2000.

5. Decide your role. Who do you want to be? Director? Scriptwriter? Cameraman? If you don’t know how to use equipment, get a crew to make it work.

6. Cast. You don’t need to go through agents. Look around. Select talented people you know and see if they can act.

7. Go digital. Learn how to compose, control and edit on digital video—or hire a cameraman who can.

8. Shoot the film. A filmmaker is a storyteller. You don’t need complicated techniques or fantastic lighting to tell a story. Especially when you have a tight budget. “You can limit the number of locations or cast members. Shoot with natural light. Just use your imagination and make the film naturally,” Kongdej suggests.

9. Edit. Use editing software such as iMovie and Adobe Premier. (But not a pirated copy, please.)

10. Hand it in. Meet the deadline! Some contests like Fat Short Film screen all films, whether they receive awards or not. So even if you don’t win, you can see your work onscreen and get audience feedback.

11. Don’t give up. Every successful director worked very hard before anyone knew who he or she was.

Directions

Kantana Film School 02-690-6141 ext 102-104. www.kantana.co.th/edutainment/enter_media.htm. Complete film courses.

www.bioscopemagazine.com Updated news about short films and contests.

www.thaifilm.com Updated news about short films and contests by Thai Film Foundation.

www.thaishortfilm.com Updated news about short films and contests as well as info on short film courses, equipment rental, etc.

How to Cut an Album

1. Know your strengths. Figure out what you do best and stick with it. If you’re just starting out, choose rock or rap or R&B—but don’t try to do them all.

2a. Form a band. You bandmates should be people who are comfortable to work and be with. “My bandmates are my friends. It’s important to have bandmates who can get along together and have the same goal. We formed our band, Apartment Khunpa, to have fun. Finances aren’t our primary concern,” says frontman Tul Waitoonkiat.

2b. Decide to be a solo artist. If you decide to be a solo artist, go for it, but you have to be that much better. “We are interested in both bands and solo artists, but a solo artist must have a great voice, and he should be both a singer and songwriter. We also look for people who can produce their own albums,” Rungroj Uptampotiwat, managing director of indie label Small Room, says.  

3. Practice, practice, practice. Practice makes perfect. “Apartment Khunpa rehearses every Tuesday. If you can rehearse twice a week or more, all the better. A lot of practice helps us to be strong and play smoothly when we’re live,” Tul explains.

4. Play live. There are many places around town where they’ll let you audition, and that’s your chance to play live in front of an actual audience. “Playing live is important. It’s the best way to get close with audiences. Playing our music again and again in public helped people get used to it,” Tul explains. 

5. Make a demo. A demo is your resume to record labels. “We listen to every demo and let bands know our comments. Almost all of the artists who released albums with us we knew from demos,” Rungroj says. There are computer programs that can make it easy: Try Logic Express, Cubase or TurboDemo. If you aren’t sure what to do, go to a studio and let a professional help you out.

6. Find the right label. Figure out which labels suit your style of music. Many indie labels such as Small Room, Panda Records and Hualampong Riddim welcome artists who don’t come in cute packages, but you will get to produce your albums yourself. If you go for major labels or indies under big labels such as Giraffe Records and Sanamluang, you might have to change your outfit—and sometimes your music—to fit their style.

7. Be persistent. Many artists have to wait for years. “A band called Lemon Soup will release their first album with us just this year, and we heard a demo from their frontman four years ago,” the Small Room managing director recounts.

8. Get a job. It ain’t gonna happen overnight, and even if it does, “overnight” could mean months, even years. Suggests Tul: “Artists must have a financial plan. Our members have other jobs to support themselves. Even though people know us, music is not our main source of income.”

Get Your Music To The Masses

Accepting Auditions

Ashley’s Rumor 1/F, Liberty Plaza, Soi Thonglor, 02-714-7861/-4: pop and rock music

Brick Bar 1/F Buddy Lodge Building, 265 Khao San Rd.,02-629-4702: blues, jazz and big band music

Jam Bar 1/F Liberty Plaza, Soi Thong Lor, 01-832-0675: pop and rock music
Khao San 3/F, Dutchess Plaza, Soi Thong Lor, 02-381-0865/-66: retro pop and rock music

Noriega’s 106/108 Soi 4, Silom Rd., 02-233 2813-14: jazz, indie, metal, and acoustic pop and rock music

TCDC 6/F The Emporium, 622, Sukhumvit Rd., 02-664-8448, www.tcdc.or.th

Indie Labels

Indie music labels like Bakery, Smallroom, Love is, and Panda have really been making waves lately. Some of their websites have info on where and how to submit demos (2-3 examples of your band’s music on a CD). Check out an extensive directory of these and other independent labels contact info at www.cityblue.net/connect/viewcat.php?cat=Label.

Music Schools

Gen X Academy 23/26-29 RCA, Rama 9, 02-2031-001. www.genxacademy.com. Offers advanced and modern music lessons.

Mifa Music School 02-259-4545. www.mifah.com. Music schools owned by Grammy in various locations.

Trinity School 4/F Vanit Building 2, 403, Phetchaburi Rd., 02-655-7770. www.eduprogress.com. A music school with rehearsal rooms, a recording studio, a stage and a computer music lab.

www.formumandme.com/article.php?a=188. A list of music schools.

Music Studios

BNG 02-466-3615 and 02-465-4675. www.bngmusicthailand.com. Rehearsal studio for bands to get loud in without disturbing the neighbors.

Music Boom 02-252-5364. www.musicboomstudio.com. Rehearsal studio where you can also record demos.

Music Farm 02-914-9514 and 02-914-8668. www.music-farm.co.th. Music recording studio.

Prach Music 02-203-0423. Rehearsal studio where you can also record demos.
Sexy Pink Studio 06-604-7344. Music recording studio. Sex not included.

Radio Stations

Fat Radio 104.5 FM “Entrance” program (Fri, 4pm-midnight) and “Bedroom Studio” program (Mon-Fri, midnight to 12:30am) play demos from unsigned artists.

Size Doesn’t Matter

The small label Small Room has helped artists like Armchair, Montonn Jira and Superbaker achieve stardom. Managing Director Rungroj Uptampotiwat gives us a few tips.

What kind of music are you looking for?

Different from the mainstream but not complicated. A demo should stand out from the rest. The music should have good melodies. Appearances don’t count. Just be yourself. Be natural.

Does an aspiring artist need to study in a music school?

If that person doesn’t know the basics, he might need to take some courses. But if he can play a guitar, to get to the next level is a matter of creativity. At Small Room, only a few artists have degrees in music, but everyone is a keen listener of music.

How to Create Your Own Website

1. Create original content. To gain market share online, a website creator should create content that targets niche users. “A new creator should provide content that he has special interest or knowledge in and aims to reach a specific group, such as content for violin lovers or Honda Jazz drivers. These can get you noticed easily because they’re rare,” Wanchat Padungrat, a founder of Pantip.com recommends.

2. Use free websites. For a beginner who has no idea about web language, free websites are a good option as they are easy to use and, of course, they’re free. You have nothing to lose. “I would recommend a new creator to start with a free website,” the founder of Pantip.com said. “Spend your time and money developing content and providing services until the website has a lot of users. You can always decide to create a new website or hire a web designer later on if you want.”

3. Register a domain name. Though it’s free, a free website has downsides including the fact that search engines usually ignore it. Some sites have names too long to remember. If you have financial support, get a domain name. Pick a short name that’s easy to remember and spell it out. Then, register the name with ecomsiam.com, thaizone.com or hosting.co.th. Prices starts around B600 per year.

4. Select web hosting. Web hosting is a service providing a space for your website on a server so Internet users can access it. Prices differ from one Internet Service Provider (ISP) to another and depend upon the amount of space you take up. While servertoday.com offers 2GB with domain name at B2,006/ year, siamnow.net has 150MB with free domain name at B1,500/year.

5. Create your website. You have choices. The easiest way is to use templates available on line. If you like doing it the hard way, learn how to do it yourself. There are many courses available in a variety of schools or you can learn it yourself from books. “Some easy books to read are Flash for Dummies (Gurdy Leete and Ellen Finkelstein), Dreamweaver MX for Dummies (Janine Warner and Irena Berkowitz) and Photoshop CS for Dummies (Deke McClelland),” Klaus Fruchtnis, the artistic director of Duran Studio recommends.

6. Promote the site. To get web traffic to your site, you have to get on the web engines. Go to addme.com/submission.htm and add you domain name for free. There are a variety of books out now on how to get listed on Google searches. The best way to promote your website is through word of mouth. “Most internet users know a new website through word of mouth, but that site must be outstanding in service,” Wanchat explains.

Help in Setting Up your Online Presence

Free Website Services

www.meeweb.com
www.powersite4you.com
www.sitepackage.com
www.taradquickweb.com

Web Design School

The International Art School of Bangkok (29 South Sathorn Rd., 02-670-4233.
www.alliance-francaise.or.th) provides classes teaching web design basics.
Net Design (02-642-1100. www.netdesign.ac.th) is a design school with branches located throughout the city.

Raffles Design Institute (5/F, Silom Center, 2 Silom Rd., 02-632-7666. www.rdi.in.th) provides fundamental knowledge of web design.

Blog and Podcast

In online communities, the terms blog (a short form of weblog) and podcast have become very popular, but what are they? Klaus Fruchtnis, the artistic director of Duran Studio, explains:
“’Blog’ and ‘newsletter’ are the same thing. It’s an online journal that is updated as frequent as the information needs to be changed. A podcast is a method of publishing information (files) to the Internet or a method through which this information is delivered to the user. This method is very common on websites with music/audio files.”

As they’re so popular, do we need to use these techniques on our websites?
“To create a website you can use simple programs or even programs with templates that teach how to do it step-by-step. A blog or a podcast would only be useful if you really need to update or send information to the users, but it is not the only way to set up information online. Designing websites is not just limited to placing the files in a page but also to analyzing the needs of the site and finding the right tools that suit your ideas.”

After earning a degree in film in Berkley, California, Peter Ho-Sun Chan or Peter Chan has become a producer, a director and a scriptwriter, making more than 30 films in the past 20 years. His film Comrades: Almost a Love Story or Tian Mi Mi (1988) has been acclaimed as one of the finest Hong Kong films made in recent years and is a decent combination of artistic and commercial elements. The trilingual director worked with a Hollywood studio to produce Love Letter (1999) and also made Jan Dara (2001), The Eye (2002) and Three Extreme (2004). His latest film, Perhaps Love, was a six-time winner at the Hong Kong Film Awards. The Eye is currently now being remade in Hollywood.

It’s always a balance between package and content. When I’m working on a script that seems somewhat more artistic, I try to put movie stars or something in it to make it a more complete package. On the other hand, when the content is commercial, I try to use a simple approach.

The most important thing about working on a film set is that the crew must be selfless. Hong Kong and Thai crews are good, fast, professional and very strong artistically, but they have no ego. It’s easy to work with them.

Chicago and Moulin Rouge didn’t inspire me to make Perhaps Love. I’m not a big fan of musicals. The reason that Perhaps Loves reminds some people of those movies is because they are the only two musicals people have seen recently.

One reason that I wanted to be a producer was that it gave me more freedom to work on a project as a director. I have to work for two to three years on a script before jumping on board to direct. If I’m not a producer, it’s too long a process for me professionally and financially to do that.

When I worked with the director John Woo, I learned from everyone on the production. At that time, I was an interpreter. The film was made in Thailand and I was the only one who could communicate with everybody because I spoke Thai, Chinese and English. I learned everything I had to know about a film set.

My father Chan Tung Man, who was also a filmmaker, was my greatest inspiration. I admired my father. I wanted to do what he did. I wanted to be him.

I’m not as talented as my father, but I’m cautious and hardworking. There’s one good thing about not being talented: Talented people tend to be overconfident.

My whole life I have been making one single movie. It’s always a love story with an intimate human relationship and emotion. Perhaps Love isn’t a musical movie and The Eye isn’t a ghost story. My style has never changed. I’m a very consistent director.

I don’t drink and I’m not the bar type. In 1993, when I worked on the movie Twenty Something, about people in their 20s who had one-night-stands, I asked my friend who was a director to do research with me at bars and nightclubs. After three-months of research, I still didn’t understand why they had one-night stands. So, I turned to my friend and asked him to direct the movie instead.

I care about everyone’s comment, not only those from film critics. It’s tiring because you can’t please everyone. There will be people who like you and people who don’t like you. I try to not care, but I still do.

It’s hard to say whether or not I’ve been successful. It’s all very subjective. For some people, I might be, but to others, I’m not. But I’m happy and content. That’s all I can say.

A familiar pepper brand in Thai kitchens, Phrik Thai Tra Meu Thi Nueng or Hand Brand No.1 has been produced by Nguan Soon since 1954. Recently, Hand Brand No.1 has been repackaged stylishly and displayed along with more than 200 herbs and spices at a shockingly pink showroom called Spice Story (G/F Siam Paragon, 991 Rama 1 Rd., 02-610-7505-6. Open daily 10am-10pm).

Appearing in a dazzling chic Chinese design, Spice Story easily attracts passing shoppers. This intriguing spice store is the brainchild of the Limprana family who run leading spice distributor, Nguan Soon. Led by Wisit Limprana, Nguan Soon has produced and exported herbs and spices from chili powder and Thai curry paste to oregano, serving more than 20 countries.

Exported products are now displayed on the shelves of Spice Story including instant khanom jiin (Chinese rice noodle, B23), laap seasoning (B25), shitake mushroom (B140) and roast barbecue pork seasoning (B25). Popular items are pepper (B53), lime leaves (B100) and dried lemongrass (B30). “Spice Story is located opposite the supermarket, and we have some products that the supermarket doesn’t have, such as Yunan ham and scented chili for casseroled prawns with glass noodles,” Wisit said.

Though the number of shoppers visiting Spice Story is high, Wisit admitted that Thai people aren’t really familiar with these spice and herbs. “A lot of Thais come in and admire our beautiful packages, then leave because they don’t know how to use our products. Our regular customers are mostly foreigners.”

To help people understand more about the products, a corner of Spice Story serves food that was prepared with their spices, such as duck noodle soup (B190), bah kute (B190), fusion spring rolls (spring rolls stuffed with smoked bacon, spinach and cheese, B70) and cooling herb tea (B40). “From the dishes we prepare, customers can see how spices in the shop are used.” In the future, the shop plans on holding demonstrations on how to cook dishes using their spices.

Another product that can draw customers into the store is their creatively spiced ice cream, which comes in seven flavors including pepper ice cream, chili ice cream and morning glory sorbet (B50/scoop). Wisit explained his strategy. “This area has a lot of teenagers passing by. We tried to figure out which products we could sell to this group and my sister created spice ice cream.” This strategy works well. The ice cream case is always busy though some kids have said the chili ice cream is too spicy.

The next step of Spice Story is to expand its store as a franchise or let Nguan Soon be a co-partner in a new shop. “We won’t sell our products separately. If someone likes our products or our shop, he has to buy the whole shop and set it up just like this Spice Story.”

The future of this spice shop seems bright. “We’ve been contacted by German and Filipino people who want to set up a Spice Story franchise. We’re still discussing the details.”

Bangkok can be a bitch. Nerve-straining situations abound in our everyday lives, and we sometimes can’t help but wish we could go ballistic. Wouldn’t it be gratifying to jump on that dickhead who’s pissing you off? Wouldn’t it be nice to nuke that mob telling you to “Awk Pai!”? But au contraire, mon frere, that’s not what civilized people do. Instead we must learn to play the game of life. Here our expert panel offers some suggestions for dealing with various stressful situations.

Road Rage

You’re signaling to cross into the other lane, but a car next to you keeps speeding up to cut you off. You honk your horn, he gives you the finger before slowing down suddenly, causing you to hit his rear bumper and smash his taillights.

The Bouncer: “Getting into a fight should always be a last resort. I would talk to the other person calmly with a gentle tone, especially to figure out how mad and unreasonable the person really is. If things get out of hand, leave it to the police. In this kind of situation, I would talk to the person rather than trying to blame anyone. You’ve got to be as cool as possible. Who knows? You might walk away with a new friend at the end of the day.”

The Cop: “It’s hard to keep calm in these situations, but as a police officer I would first ask whether they have insurance or not. If so, we all are Thai, we shouldn’t get angry over such a thing. Let the insurance companies deal with it. If not, the truth will win out. When you’re wrong, admit you are wrong. Getting mad won’t solve the problem. Whatever happened before the accident, the best thing is to just immediately forget it. Having a fight or yelling in the middle of the street is just going to cause more problems and plus it’s dangerous to you and others.”

The Lawyer: “The law says anyone who hits someone else is the guilty party, but I can’t accept that because cutting another car off is wrong. I would talk to the guy reasonably, not emotionally. There is no point in being rude or yelling at each other. I’d tell him his driving is hazardous to everyone on the road and maybe he would listen to me.”

Free-Loading Best Friend

Your best mate from university is in town and wants to sleep on your couch for three weeks and party like its 1999… again.

The Cop: “Well, a best mate is always a best mate, but you have to tell him that times change, and since I have a family now and work to be responsible for, I’m not able to live like the old days anymore. Of course our friendship will always be there, but there comes a time when family and work have to come before friends. If he/she is really a best mate, he/she will get it right away.”

The Hotelier: “I love my friends and I would let them use my house as if it were their own home. I would join the party sometimes, but not the whole time. I’m sure if you had a good friend, he or she would know when to leave you alone.”

The Monk: “Talk to your friend reasonably. Partying and having fun should be done but only in appropriate ways. Buddhism teaches us to live balanced lives. Anything that is too much on either side can cause trouble.”

Crazy Partner

You tell your boyfriend/girlfriend you need a cooling off period from the relationship but he/she doesn’t take it well and instead hangs a note written in blood on your door saying, “We should be closer, not further apart…”

The Bouncer: “I would try to understand where exactly the relationship stands. If things are about to go further and the time apart is for everyone’s benefit, I would explain that to her. I would emphasize the future rather than the present. Sometimes we have to reduce one thing in order to gain something else. For my own safety, I would use ‘we’ rather than ‘I,’ therefore making her feel that I care about the both of us, not just myself. Remember, our future is a ‘we’ thing.”

The Shrink: “Anyone talking about a cooling off period must think it’s the beginning of the end. First, you have to consider how much you love your boyfriend/girlfriend. If you still love him/her a lot, you should make a deal with him/her. For example, you can talk on the phone daily, but don’t have to meet everyday. The best way is to try to change your routine bit by bit.”

The Hotelier: “Re-think the situation! Don’t get scared by the bloody letter. It might just be fake blood. Plus this person might be your soulmate. Or, you could file a police report.”

Pushy Parents

As usual, your father is offering unsolicited advice to drop your filmmaking career in favor of becoming a lawyer. This time he is threatening to cut you out of his will (and family fortune).

The Hotelier: “Personally, I would change for my father’s sake. Who knows—being a lawyer might be your thing and you might even like it more. Don’t fight but try and show them how you can cope with it. I believe that no parents want to see their kids unhappy. If the job isn’t really for you, they’ll know and won’t stop you from changing back. Give it some time and try.”

The Shrink: “Invite your father to visit your movie set. Whether he goes or not, talk with your dad calmly. Thank him and say that you understand his goodwill. Try to avoid mentioning a career in law negatively and let him know that making movies is what you love and want to do. Ask your dad for a chance to prove that you can be successful in your career and make him proud.”

The Yoga Instructor: “This is similar to what happened in my real life. I explained to my dad that I understood his wish, but I loved what I was doing. I asked him to believe in me and he accepted it.”

The Clueless Boss

A hot new job opens up in the company and even though you’re perfect for it, you’re overlooked for the position in favor of the smarmy new guy.

The Lawyer: “I recommend comparing and analyzing qualifications between yourself and that smarmy new guy seriously and reasonably. If he is better than you in even one thing, you should accept it. Generally, a boss makes decisions based on what is good for a company, not based on his personal feelings. However, if you really think that he has something against you, you should consider leaving.”

The Monk: Tum jai or let it go. As a subordinate, you have no power to make changes. Don’t take any position seriously. It is just something to make a living. We don’t really need luxuries, but can survive with simple ways, houses and clothes. Don’t push yourself too hard. Adequacy and self-reliance are enough.”

The Yoga Instructor: “Every position is important, whether you are a maid or an executive. We should be happy doing what we are doing, and there is no need to confront your boss. You can’t make other people think like you.”

Vindictive Co-workers

A presentation to a major client tanked and now the team leader is pointing fingers saying your stats and info caused the failure.

The Monk: “Nobody wants to admit a mistake. That’s why your team leader tries to point the finger at someone else. It’s a team effort. Everyone had a part in the failure. Don’t make an argument, just mention the team effort.”

The Shrink: “Evaluate your stats and info again to find your mistake. If your stats are weak, you must admit your fault, but if you believe there is no mistake, talk to your team leader. Tell him you already tried your best then ask him for advice on what can improve your report.”

The Yoga Instructor: “Apologize to your team leader and tell her you did your best. Make it clear that whatever you did was a team effort. In the end, let your leader make the decision to give you a new chance or let you go.”

Noisy Neighbors

Every night the neighbors crank up the volume on their terrible karaoke, which lasts until midnight. Your anonymous letters for peace and quiet are not working.

The Cop: “Tell them exactly what you feel and how you suffer from their karaoke face to face in a polite way. Tell them that you need to rest after a long, hard day at work. If it still happens consistently, you can file a report at your local police station. Let the police come to stop them. In the worst case scenario, you might need to file a petition for arrest for nighttime noise disturbance.”

The Hotelier: “I would buy a bigger, more expensive, better quality stereo and give it to my neighbor since they’re going to sing every day anyway, and I’d rather hear the better sound quality. If you can’t fix the problem, live with it.”

The Shrink: “Make friends with this neighbor by saying hi or giving him some gift because you have to be around each other for a long time. Whenever you have a chance, tell him that you have to work on your assignment at home every night and you are so stressed and need to concentrate on your work. Don’t mention the noise. Hopefully they’ll be able to figure it out themselves.”

Stubborn Chauffeur

You’re going to an important meeting and time is running out. You jump in a taxi and tell the driver to go one way that you’re certain will be faster, but the driver ignores you, instead taking his own way, which makes the trip longer.

The Bouncer: “Personally, I’ve had this kind of problem before but I do respect the driver since it’s their specialty. Their job is to know which way is the best for both parties, and saves time, money and fuel. I normally try to make it sound more like a conversation than advice. I don’t think anyone likes to be advised on what they think they know best. I would make conversation like, ‘Which way do you normally take? Is it going to be congested at this time?’ Then I would say something like, ‘Sometimes I take that way, but do you think there’s a better way to go?’ Make sure that you make it sound like you’re asking for their help, not commanding them to do something.”

The Lawyer: “Tell him nicely right away that you want to get out. Driving a taxi is a service. When you pay for service, you are supposed to get what you want.”

Political Stress

You’re so frustrated and stressed out when you read the political news and chaos that is happening everywhere. You realize this issue is not something you can talk with your pals about, but it’s so bad you are about to burst.

The Bouncer: “I’m personally Buddhist, so I do everything as to not be too tight or too loose. We need to live our lives in moderation. When I have this political stress, I release it in other ways like working out or playing sports instead of causing harm to someone else.”

The Cop: “It’s always the same in the political game. You see politicians dragging out some issue from a long time ago, or a skeleton from someone else’s past, but at the end of the day they are all nice to each other’s faces. I’m not fed up, but its annoying. I’ve just seen way too much of it.”

The Shrink: “Avoid any media relating to political issues for a while. Relax and realize you don’t posses this country. Consider what you can do as a Thai citizen and never disturb other people. Evaluate yourself in terms of what you have done for this country so far.”

Our Panel of Experts

1. The Bouncer: Wittaya Singlompon, 35, is a bouncer at Q Bar. He regularly has to deal with stupid drunks speaking foreign languages.

2. The Cop: Prasong Nawin, 50, is a traffic cop who’s been in the brown uniform for decades. His primary job apart from keeping the traffic flowing is to make sure that people don’t cause disturbances by losing their temper behind the wheel.

3. The Hotelier: Jirarat Bhandhukravi, 29, has worked as a hotel operator for three years and has spent the past two years at the front desk of the Royal Orchid Sheraton.

4. The Lawyer: Ekkapol Apinun, 36, is a senior legal manager at Yum Restaurant International.

5. The Monk: Phra Khru Banpot Dhamma Rangsi is an abbot at Wat Pa Namthip.

6. THE SHRINK: Worada Wasunnuntasiri, 26, is a psychologist at the Department of Corrections in the Ministry of Justice.

7. The Yoga Instructor: Boonrada Nokyophin, 40-something, has been practicing yoga for more than 20 years.

Kondej Jaturaurasmee is the latest Thai filmmaker to go inter. His film, Cherm (Midnight My Love), was awarded Best Picture and Best Director by the Bangkok Critics Assembly last year, and was recently awarded Best Screenplay at the Asian Film Festival in Deauville, France. The 34-year-old has done many things in his life, but this multitalented dynamo remains modest, still considering himself an underdog. In addition to directing films, he has also written screenplays (The Letter) and music with his indie band, Si Tao Thur.

I’ve wanted to produce films since I was a high school student.

Making films is more than just entertainment. I consider it a significant career.

Movies about underdogs are my favorite because I feel like I am one of them. I have an inferiority complex and sometimes I feel this attitude drives me to work harder on things to prove that I’m not mediocre.

Making music is a joyful relief. If I don’t like the way something is coming out, or I don’t believe in it, I don’t have to do it. There is no need to fake it with music.

Making a film requires much more compromise because it requires a lot of money—most of which isn’t mine. I need to understand what moviegoers want and then form my ideas around that.

Columns about readers’ experiences in porn magazines inspired me to write the screenplay for Sayew. I think magazine writers, not readers, write those letters because the writing style is so smooth.

It doesn’t matter if Ton, the male lead in The Letter, exists in the real world or not. The Letter’s message is that we should do whatever we can for the ones we love when they are still alive and with us.

My philosophy is one of escape. I believe all people like to escape—even confrontational types. Escape facilitates our dreams and gives us hope. It only becomes a problem when we can’t balance our dream world with our real life.

After seeing Cherm (Midnight My Love), someone asked me if I believed in karma. Karma is a complicated thing. Sometimes people do the right thing, but they don’t see it pay off. It’s a matter of faith, and we shouldn’t lose our faith.

The feedback for Cherm and Sayew at the Asian Film Festival was terrific. It was great to know that Thai films could speak to foreigners.

I’ve always created films for a Thai audience and have never thought about how foreign viewers would react to them.

Recently I’ve been working on a screenplay for Nu Hin The Movie. It’s interesting because I’m summarizing a long cartoon series into a two-hour film.

I’m writing songs for Pakorn “Dome” Rum’s fourth album. I’m making the songs as mainstream as possible because his third album only communicated to a niche audience. We need some hit songs to sell it.

Right now, the best things in my life are my twins. They are nine years old. I finally found that the purpose of being human is to give birth.