Dogs are more than mere pets; they are members of the family just as much as humans, and the range of pedigree services available proves it. From spas to takeaway dinners to café meals, dogs now have it just as good as we do. Don’t make a dog’s breakfast out of caring for your pooch: Here are some pampering providers who will make any mongrel stop its bitching.

Rub-A-Dub-Dub.

Spas are no longer just the province of tai tais; pooches can now indulge as well. After a hard week of chasing the neighborhood cats and straining at the leash, your pet will need to chill out at Kreature Care (75 Jalan Hitam Manis, Holland Village, 9781-5744). Here dogs can get 60-90 minute ($50-75) spa treatments that include a swim, a soak in a tubful of herbs and spa milk followed by (we’re not kidding) a thorough sports massage.

Showing Off

Glam it up and make your darling a regular show dog by sending it to a pet salon. Les Poochs (26 Holland Grove Rd., 6469-9331) is one of the most exclusive in town (they take only five appointments a day). Treatments come in packages that include a wash, manicure and pedicure, and styling ($60-250). Les Poochs’ shampoos are luxurious and natural, without any soap or alcohol, and come with scents specially designed for male and female dogs as well as unisex fragrances for puppies. Some of their ingredients include royal jelly, sea kelp and vitamins D5 and E. The rest of the treatment includes styling fit for the stars: How about a mohawk for your schnauzer or a teddy bear look for your shih-tzu?

She’s Got the Look

To complete the doggy makeover, a new wardrobe is in order. The style gurus at Fluffy’s Choice (33A Lorong Liput, 6464-8255) have everything a mutt might need—from jumpers to caps and bandanas. Worried about spoiling that little nail trim? Even socks are available. For those more formal occasions, little tuxedoes or dresses are ideal. And when out visiting the relatives, what better way to accentuate the new look than with a silk robe with sash ($38) or a Mandarin top with buttons and collar ($26)?

Café Culture

Now that your pup is primed and ready to hit the town, take it out for dinner to celebrate. Urban Pooch (#01-07 530 Balestier Rd., 6252-5046) provides food for both dogs and their owners. Hungry hounds can chose from meal sets that include one of these mains—German Shepherd pie, grilled meatballs, John Dory fish or jerky—plus a big bowl of water ($3.80 per set). If your dog’s getting a bit of cabin fever and wants to make some friends, there’s an elongated play area where up to 20 dogs can socialize. And for owners who’ve forgotten to bring their copy of I-S Magazine, reference books on dogs are supplied.

For the more selfish owner who doesn’t want to restrict his dining experience to the animal menu, Epicurious (#01-02 The Quayside, 60 Robertson Quay, 6734-7720) is a pet-friendly establishment where dogs are welcome to sit outside with their owners. Water bowls are available for thirsty Fidos.

Dog Tired

If Rex is more of a homedoggy then here’s a way he can feast like a king without ever having to leave his kennel. US Doggie Bakery (355 East Coast Rd., 6346-7168) will deliver tingkat ($16.50) meals for your pooch. These are gourmet meals for the discerning doggie: How do cheese paws, carob chips and lamb meatballs sound? Throw in chicken or lamb baos (five for $3.50) or cookies ($8.50 for 200 grams) for dessert or supper, and you’re set. What more could a dog beg for?

Party Time

More sociable mutts can mark their special occasions and territories by hosting a party. You no longer have to worry about lactose intolerance when catering to your hungry hound’s dessert needs: Greedy Pet Bakery (230 Tanjong Katong Rd., 6344-1554) can deliver cakes and pastries to make you look like the hostess with the mostest. Get cakes in chicken, lamb, beef or fish, as well as fruitcakes ($25-35). They even come with candles and messages, and are shaped as hearts or bones. And to make it really feel like a children’s party, goodie bags filled with sweet treats (prices vary) can be arranged.

Big Boys Toys

Forget about daggy doggy toys like old thongs and smelly tennis balls. Get serious by buying interactive toys for your four-legged friend to bury in the backyard. For instance, Brainy Dog Treats Tennis Ball ($9.50) is a ball stuffed with food to encourage some cardio while Rex picks at his food. The Woof or Treats interactive toys ($22.90) make noises to draw the dog’s attention. But if you prefer more traditional squeakers, frisbees and fetching toys, then Hotdog (268 River Valley Rd., 6736-4064) has the full range. They even deliver.

Tag It

Dog tags might not be loud enough for some, so to put your puppy love on display head to Woof Woof (372 Telok Blangah Rd., 6272-7271) where you can buy a personalized pet plate. Think car plate, but embossed with doggie’s name using wacky colors and fonts ($27-35).

Precious Moments

And after you’ve spent all your money adorning your four-legged friend with grooming, spa treatments and a bit of bling, take some shots to remember just where all your hard-earned money went. For $800 at Munch Media (#01-07 Tower 1 Sin Ming Plaza, 2 Sin Ming Rd., 9435-1783), a coffee table album can be filled with photographs of your prize pooch in costume, in various settings or in those more natural and less rehearsed poses. If you prefer to keep your posing private, then Munch Media will even come to you so you don’t have to walk the dog into the studio.

The words feng shui are often bantered around, but what do they really mean and how are they relevant to us? We picked the brain of feng shui consultant Sean Lui to find out some of the basic principles to maximizing this ancient wisdom for a prosperous Year of the Dog.

Hocus Pocus

To the modern person, feng shui seems like a bit of mumbo jumbo peppered with scientific-sounding words like “direction” and “energy.” So what really is feng shui?

Lui describes it as a “harmonization of humans with their environment.” In other words, it is the science of how to bring humans into sync with their living areas. The theory goes that if you live in a hostile environment, this will encourage a negative energy that will affect five core areas of your life: Relationships, wealth, career, romance and health. Feng shui tries to address these hostilities by making your environment as positive as possible, and thus maximizes your chances of excelling in every aspect of your life.

Moving House

Your home is your retreat from work, stress and the general problems of the outside world, so in feng shui terms its important to try to harness as much positive energy as possible in this, one of your most pivotal living spaces.

According to Lui, from 2004-2023 the most positive directions for your home to be facing are north and south. This also goes for the position of your house in relation to the country’s entire geography as well so that, for instance, houses situated in Punggol or Sengkang are in lucky or positive positions. If your house faces a different direction, then using a formula involving your birth chart, a feng shui consultant can advise on special ornaments whose strategic positioning will deflect any undesirable energy.

In terms of the shape of your home, sharp cornered houses should be avoided. Lui says houses should always be squarish or rectangular with no missing corner.

And, if you can help it, it’s best to avoid being located near places of religion such as churches or mosques. This is because the energy emitted from these localities is complicated: People usually attend places of worship because they have difficult problems they are seeking to solve, so a lot of negative energy is emitted. All this will naturally affect the properties around the source.

Open Communication

The lounge is a room for resting and relaxing, so it should feel like an environment conducive to these activities. More importantly, it is the primary place where family members communicate with one another, so it is especially important to ensure that people feel comfortable here. Lui suggests that the best way to ensure this result is to look at what elements are favorable to the home’s owner (according to his or her birth chart). For instance, if water is a favorable element, then lots of soft blues can be used in the room, or an aquarium-like environment can be created to help build positive energy.

It’s important that a lounge does not face any sharp point (such as the corner of another building), which is a “poison arrow” in feng shui terms. If you can’t help it, then the best way to counteract this negative chi (energy) is to put tall leafy plants in front of the window facing the arrow. Lui says leaves are the most effective way to minimize or slow down negative energy.

Sweet Dreams

The bedroom is a place of rest, so this should be its focus. If there are other focal points in the bedroom, then a person will be distracted from his or her main objective (sleep) and the area won’t be conducive to a good night’s rest.

Lui recommends that the bed should face the direction of the female (not male) owner’s most positive direction, as determined by her birth chart. If this is physically impossible, then feng shui will use more creative means to do so. For instance, if the owner’s direction is west, which represents metal, then bed linen with metallic elements or even metallic colors (such as gold or silver) can be used to replicate the effects of facing west.

Having mirrors around the bed might be kinky, but it’s certainly not feng shui savvy. You should not be able to see yourself in the mirror while you are lying down in bed. The logic behind this is that sleep is when the body recycles its bad energy and replaces it with good. A mirror will just bounce your bad energy right back. But ordinary logic plays an important part as well. When you’re vulnerable in the middle of the night, the last thing you want is to startle yourself with your mirror image.

But the biggest no-no is to position your bed with your feet facing the door. This has long been regarded as the position for corpses, not those of us still alive and kicking.

Working the Office

In this time of open plan offices, it’s a bit difficult to pick and choose your desk position, but luckily Lui says this isn’t a problem. Contrary to popular belief, it’s not all bad if your back faces an open space. Just don’t have your back face an entrance. What Lui says here really makes sense: If your back is facing a door or entrance, then you’ll be distracted all day as people come and go. This affects your behavior, and therefore your ability to work effectively.

We’ve all seen the water features, crystals and various other gadgets that are touted as encouraging good energy. A guy should put such objects on his left side, while a girl should have all positive decorations on the right side of her desk.

And if you’re worried about which direction your computer should face, that can be determined for you by consulting a feng shui practitioner and your birth chart.

Chinese Whispers

Rumor has it that when our country was in its infancy, several feng shui masters were consulted about how feng shui could help ensure national economic prosperity. The masters advised that every Singaporean should carry an octagram to encourage wealth. Our leaders pondered how they could ensure every Singaporean would do this, and came up with an ingenious plan. Most of our currency was adorned with a octagram, thus guaranteeing that almost every person would be carrying the lucky symbol around with him at all times.

Under the Hood

To know what you need to do to make feng shui an active part of your life, the first step is to consult a feng shui practitioner or consultant to figure out your birth chart. This ancient theory of formulas works by examining the solar date on which you are born. A feng shui consultant can, using a series of very complicated formulas, calculate and forecast what is best for you.

Some gals like to do it every few weeks, but for most of us the concept of a full Brazilian wax is a little daunting (although strangely intriguing). And the idea of a Boyzilian, where they go full sack, back and crack? Forget it. To get to the root of the issue, we sent two virgin guinea pigs (anonymously) to STRIP Co-Ed to have a “Triple X” treatment and get (almost) everything taken off.

THE BRAZILIAN (THE GIRLS)

So how was it having someone poke around down there?
The staff were great; they were calm and collected when dealing with my nerves, and their sense of humor really helped too, their professionalism was faultless. Plus she was fast; it was over in 30 minutes.

Can you wear underwear during the process?
No. Not for a Triple X Brazilian.

Is there any strange or acrobatic position you have to be in for a successful strip?
I was basically spread eagle.

What was it like when the first strip was pulled? Does it get easier or does the pain just build up?
Like “aagh!” No, each strip is just a moment of shock, disbelief and sting.

What is worse: The pain, the hot wax or the discomfort of the stickiness?
The pain is in the ripping out of the hairs. The wax is not hot, just warm.

On a scale of 1-10 (10 being natural childbirth), how would you rate the pain?
For some areas it’s just a six, for the more delicate areas it’s an eight.

Does the pain last after the treatment or is it just at the moment of extraction?
The pain is very temporary.

Did they poke into every crevice and separate any cheeks?
Yes, if you’re going for the Triple X or the “Full Monty,” be prepared to be poked and “separated.”

What was it like immediately afterwards? Could you walk and sit down, jump and dance?
I was fine, but sex and swimming were not options.

Was there any annoying after effect, like swelling, burning or itching?
Some rawness. I looked like a plucked chicken. I felt very “bare” afterwards.

How long did it take for your skin to return to normal?
A full 24 hours.

Does it make you feel sexier?
The smoothness is nice, but I didn’t like looking at myself in the mirror—I look too “exposed.” I prefer the air of mystery some bush provides.

Did it improve sex?
I did enjoy the “cleanliness” provided.

How was the regrowth process?
No problem, although the look is a bit mangy. It began resprouting within nine days.

Will you succumb to a waxing again?
I would do the Single X wax next time, but not the Triple X. It’s too in ya face for me.

THE BOYZILIAN (THE BOYS)

So how was it having someone poke around down there?
The staff were good humored, knowledgeable and professional, making me feel comfortable and in good hands.

Can you wear underwear during the process?
No, it’s just me and my birthday suit.

Is there any strange or acrobatic position you have to be in for a successful strip?
When they waxed my scrotum and crack. I had to hike my knees up to my chest, clasp my ankles, and bare all.

What was it like when the first strip was pulled? Does it get easier or does the pain just build up?
The first strip feels like multiple ant bites, small sharp stings, then a numbing sensation.

What is worse: The pain, the hot wax or discomfort of the stickiness?
It was a toss up between the pain and the hot wax. At times the wax was too hot, thus adding to the discomfort when stripping.

On a scale of 1-10 (10 being kicked in the nuts), how would you rate the pain?
Four (having a one-year-old stand on your nuts).

Does the pain last after the treatment or is it just at the moment of extraction?
The sharp pain does not stay for long. It’s the swelling of the skin that stays.

Did they poke into every crevice and separate any cheeks?
Yes, and you have to lend a hand too.

What was it like immediately afterwards? Could you walk and sit down, jump and dance?
Sore and uncomfortable. Forget about having sex.

Was there any annoying after effect, like swelling, burning or itching?
There is slight swelling and discomfort.

How long did it take for your skin to return to normal?
About three days.

Does it make you feel sexier?
No, not really, but I feel braver for having tried it and it’s kind of nice to be smooth again.

Did it improve sex?
“Somewhat” would be the most honest answer, but it’s psychological and not sensational.

How was the regrowth process?
Hair regrowth was normal, but new follicles returned within a week, so if you take into account the pain, it’s hardly worth the effort.

Will you succumb to a waxing again?
No. Only once for the experience, thank you. I’m not into S&M.

From The Lips of The Experts

So is there a way to ease the pain but still achieve that smooth finish? Strip therapist Phau Lee Lan recommends that your pubes should be at least 0.5 cm long for the best results. There’s no special underwear you should don for your appointment, but just don’t plan to do any sun tanning or go to the sauna afterwards, as the area will be vulnerable for at least 24 hours. For best results, Phau suggests waxing should be done monthly.