1. Go food hunting at Yaowarat. Forget about the calorie counting. Break all the diet rules and hit the food vendors that line the streets of Chinatown. Feast on a plethora of delectable grub including red BBQ pork, dim sum, roasted chestnuts, kuay jub, grilled seafood, noodles, and much, much more. Just don’t forget the ENO antacid.

2. Shopping spree at Chatuchak. It’s Sunday afternoon. The heat is rising. You are sweating buckets in the sticky, crowded market, but an incredible range of bargains makes the whole trip worthwhile. Before you know it, you’ve got bags of shirts, pants, shoes and handicrafts at your side and a brand new puppy trailing along behind. First-timers might want to check out www.jatujakguide.com.

3. Pray for a lover with Pra Trimurati. Desperately seeking your other half? Save yourself the embarrassment of having to go to a speed dating event and make your way to Trimurati shrine in front of the Central World Plaza on Ratchadamri Road instead. The best time to go is on Thursday at 9:30pm, when it is believed the god comes down to help the lovesick. Don’t forget to bring a rose garland, one candle and nine incense sticks—all in red.

4. Go horse racing. What better way to pass a Sunday afternoon than cheering for your favorite pony? A cheap entrance fee and cold beer make the activity more appealing, even if you aren’t into racing. There are two tracks in town—the Royal Turf Club (Phitsanulok Road, 02-280-0020-9) and the Royal Bangkok Sports Club (Henri Dunant Road, 02-251-0181-6). Races are held every other Sunday, 12:30-6pm. Admission is B50-300.

5. Go to a lady boy cabaret. Straight up, the lady boys of Bangkok offer a hell of a show, packed with invigorating entertainment, over-the-top costumes, flamboyant choreography and healthy pinches of silliness and humor. Get out of the closet and sing along to “I Will Survive.” The Calypso Cabaret (Asia Hotel, Phayathai Road, 02-653-3960 ext. 2, www.calypsocabaret.com) has two shows daily—8:15pm and 9:45pm.

6. Take a boat ride. Though most of the klongs that earned Bangkok the nickname “Venice of the East” have been filled to make way for roads, you can still enjoy a breezy boat ride along the Chao Phraya River. On a clear (or bad traffic) day, buy a B100 one-day pass from the Chao Phraya Express Boat (02-623-6001, 02-225-3003, www.chaophrayaboat.co.th) and enjoy unlimited trips to explore the city from a whole new perspective. Boats stop at 10 major piers including Sathorn and Phra Athit. Every Sunday, there’s also a ferry to Koh Kred in Nonthaburi.

7. Visit the TCDC. The greatest creation since sliced bread (or in our case somtam), the Thailand Creative and Design Center (6/F, The Emporium, 02-664-8448, BTS Phrom Phong, www.tcdc.or.th) has done the impossible: drawing Thais to art exhibitions (interestingly, it took putting a gallery in a mall to do it). From the fabulous Isaan Retrospective and Marimekko exhibitions to the current Vivienne Westwood display, art has never been this tempting.

8. Root for Thai boxers. Fatal kicks, deadly punches, furious elbow strikes... You’ve seen it in the papers and watched it on TV, but nothing compares to seeing these moves executed live in a stadium with thousands of fans cheering in the background. Get your adrenaline going at Lumpini Stadium (Rama 4 Road, 02-252-8765, 02-251-4303, www.muaythailumpini.com. Fight nights: Tue, Fri, Sat) or Ratchadamneon Stadium (Ratchadamneon Nok, 02-281-4205. Fight nights: Mon, Wed, Thu, Sun).

9. Climb the Banyan Tree. Whether you are a fitness enthusiast with enough stamina to race up 1,093 steps, seek to defy gravity or simply want to help a good cause, the Banyan Tree’s Vertical Marathon is a challenging mission. The annual charity event occurs this year on September 10, 2006, with the finish line being Vertigo restaurant on the 61st floor (South Sathorn Rd., 02-679-1200). Even if you can’t complete the marathon in one fell swoop, joining the event is a good deed as the proceeds go to support the HIV Formula Feeding Fund.

10. Enjoy the view at Sirocco. Picture this: You are dining al fresco on the 64th floor of Bangkok’s second-tallest building with glittering lights of the city below and the twinkling stars above. Breezy jazz tunes waft through the air. The spherical Sky Bar fascinates with its alternating pastel hues. What romantic ambiance Sirocco (The Dome, State Tower, Silom Road, 02-624-9555, Open daily 6pm-1am, www.thedomebkk.com) provides! Though the prices are as sky-high as the building itself, the panoramic view makes it worth at least enjoying a cocktail…or a mineral water.

11. See puppets at Naatayasala Hun Lakorn Lek (Joe Louis Theater). The Joe Louis Theater (1875 Suan Lum Night Bazaar, Rama 4 Road, 02-252-9683-4, www.thaipuppet.com) derives its name from the nickname of Sakorn Yangkaewsot, who has devoted himself to bringing life to hun lakorn lek (small puppets). It is the only place in Thailand to be mesmerized by an exquisite performance as puppeteers deftly master their lifelike marionettes. Showtime is 7:30pm. B400 for Thai, B900 for foreigners.

12. Reach for the stars. Why just vote for them when you can join and win? The first season of Academy Fantasia saw Vit, a local Justin Timberlake from Nonthaburi, win the popular award, while fresh-faced Aof from Chainart swept the patronesses off their feet and took over the AF2 throne. But no winners from Bangkok...yet!

13. Express yourself. Remember the Sondhi-led demonstration in March? Remember the buzz, the solidarity among our fellow compatriots? If you missed out on that one, there are many other ways you can express your love for democracy and voice your opinion, whether or not it be in the majority. Also mark your calendar for the upcoming Election Day on October 15.

14. Take a bus somewhere. Frustrated with the traffic jam? Chances are most of you are sitting comfortably in your car while moaning about traffic. From time to time, try hopping on a bus, preferably non-air-conditioned. It’s a humbling experience to ride with the masses. See how hard it is for the common man to get from here to there?

15. Swim with the sharks. Add a thrill to your mundane 9-to-5 life and get up close and personal with the glorious sea predators. No need to head to the ocean since Siam Ocean World (B1-22F, Siam Paragon, BTS Siam, 02-687-2000, www.siamoceanworld.com, www.sharkdive.org) brings the ocean to you, right under the mega mall. Accompanied by the experts, the spine-tingling dive requires no experience, just guts.

16. Volunteer. Bangkok has been so nice to you, why not give something back? Help the injured at the Ruamkatanyu Foundation (www.ruamkatanyu.or.th), or make an audio book for the blind at the Bangkok School for the Blind (420 Ratchavithi Road, 02-246-0070, 02-246-1431, www.blind.or.th/school/volunteer). There are hundreds of opportunities out there—find the one that best suits you.

17. Visit Wat Phra Kaew. The top of any tourist’s must-visit list, the splendid Wat Phrasrirattana Sasadaram, better known as Wat Phra Kaew, has been a part of Bangkok since its inception. Don’t forget to pay homage to the Emerald Buddha. (Na Phra Lan Rd., Open daily 8:30am-3:30pm)

18. Queue for somtam at Tam Nua. The queue at Tam Nua (392/14 Siam Square Soi 5, 02-251-4880. Open daily 11.15am-9pm) is ridiculously long, but their spicy somtam and crispy fried chicken is just too good to pass up. If you just walk in and get seated, consider yourself extremely lucky.

19. Eat some scary food. Goy (spicy salad with raw pork), goong ten (live shrimp with chili and herbs), khai khao (egg containing undeveloped embryo)...when it comes to weird food of questionable safety, Bangkok has it all as long as you can muster up the courage to eat it. Take a baby step and start with fried insects.

20. Visit a haunted house. We heard the tales about the unfortunate maid who was beaten to death by burglars in a now deserted house tucked away in the secluded Ramkhamhaeng Soi 32…We’ve also have heard from people driving past the house that say they saw the ghost in the rear view mirror…Do ghosts really exist? Find out for yourself.

21. Hit the dance floor at Dude/Sweet. Is there any party in town that could top the madness of a Dude/Sweet event? We doubt it. (Check BK or www.dudesweet.org)

22. Get lost in Siam Paragon. In this consumer labyrinth, exercising and shopping are no longer mutually exclusive.

23. Count down to a new year at Central World Plaza. Now that the shopping mall has completed its makeover, the countdown to the 2007 will be glitzier than ever.

24. Be in a Thai movie. Stop complaining about bad acting and keep an eye out for open casting calls.

25. Visit a prisoner at Klong Prem Central Prison. Think your life is bad? Go talk to an inmate (222 Nonthaburi 1 Rd., 02-967-2222).

26. Read BK from cover to cover. We do, every week.

27. Go on a ladies’ night pub-crawl. Guys, why let the girls have all the fun? Throw on a dress and see what happens.

28. Buy a government lottery ticket. You could be the next billionaire.

29. Be a paparazzo. With a hi-tech mobile phone, you can take snapshots of celebrities and sell them to the tabloids. Nice hobby.

30. Get a tattoo on Khao San. All the backpackers do it. Permanent or henna.

31. Book the front row of P’Bird concert. The only chance you have to see a concert with your mom, aunt and grandmother.

32. Practice tai chi in Lumpini Park. It’s free, it’s fun, it’s good for you—need we say more?

33. See a film at House RCA. Support one of the few places that screen independent films. House (31/8, RCA, 02-641-5177, www.houserama.com) is super-cute just for coffee, too!

34. Visit Khao Din Zoo. Revisit your childhood and gape at the animals. (71 Rama 5 Rd., 02-281-2000. Open daily 8pm-9pm)

35. Have a nude photo taken. The celebrities all do it, why can’t you?

36. Pay a last visit to Don Muang. You’ve a mere three weeks left before Suvarnabhumi finally opens.

37. Buy X-rated VCDs on Silom. You don’t always have to say “no” to their naughty offer.

38. See the King. It’s a one-in-a-million chance to express how grateful you are to be one of his citizens.

39. Buy a garland from street kids. You may not want one, but at least you can help them go home earlier.

40. Join an Amway meeting. An hour of cheering, flattering remarks and pep talk fills even the shyest of people with confidence.

41. See the dragons in Lumpini Park. Just don’t feed them, OK?

42. Take a motorcycle ride through Klong Toey. A daunting cultural treat.

43. Go to the flower market. Get up early or stay out late to check out the colorful, bustling Pak Klong Talad.

44. Eat at Kai Tod Jae Gi. Otherwise known as Kai Tod Polo (137/1-2, Soi Polo, Lumpini Road, 02-655-8489), this place has some of the best fried chicken in town.

45. Laugh at the dancers at Suan Lum Night Bazaar. Not too loudly, though. They’re trying hard to start their careers in the music video industry.

46. Yell at chatty people in the theater. Others will thank you.

47. Drive a go-cart. The Fast and the Furious, right in RCA (PTT Speedway, 02-203-1205, www.kartingstadium.com. Open Mon-Thu 4pm-midnight; Fri 4pm-3am; Sat 1pm-3am; Sun 1pm-midnight).

48. Attend the festivals. Bangkok International Film Festival, Fat Festival, Bangkok Jazz Festival, Hoon Town...Bangkok has a lot of entertaining events, each with its own unique vibe.

49. Write a letter to the PM. He may not respond, but at least you’ll get a chance to vent. Write to Prime Minister’s Office, 1 Pitsanulok Rd., Dusit, Bangkok 10300.

50. Say hello to your neighbor.