In your pocket: Cigarettes, money, antibiotics, keys, mobile phone, lip balm, chewing gum and ointment for our new tattoos.
Never leave home without: Underpants and individuality.
Happiest moment: Having great new songs out and being able to sleep well at night.
As a child: F**king naughty, always skipped classes.
Idol: Parents and ourselves.
Reading: Ngao Phisart and Respect for Acting.
Favorite Bangkok sound: Rain.
All-time favorite songs: Jack Johnson’s “Better Together,” Frank Sinatra’s “My Way”.
Favorite restaurant: Japanese restaurant Taiko on Sukkumvit Soi 49.
In 20 years: The most young-looking 50-year-old ever, and probably raising grandkids.
Would like to be remembered as: Warriors.
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If a visitor from another planet were to set down in Bangkok, he might assume that progress is measured by the amount of land occupied by shopping malls, freedom by how much time it takes you to reach the mall nearest to your home or office.
If he flew over the Siam Square area, with CentralWorld, Siam Paragon, Siam Center and MBK all in a 3km radius, it might look to him like one huge mall with a few boutique shops between them. Even our pride and joy, Suvarnabhumi, is basically a sprawling shopping mall that also has planes (filled with potential shoppers) flying in and out of it.
Like zombies we’re sucked into these monuments of consumerism, where we are taught to associate spending with happiness and to confuse “need” with “want.” We develop a taste for the homogenized, the uniform and the non-challenging. We learn to find beauty in polished concrete, glass and steel, piped in pop music and fast food.
There’s an argument that shopping malls exist because the public likes them. But what gives us the willies is the feeling that we only like them because we’re running out of alternatives. A stroll through a long public park along the banks of the Chao Phraya River sounds great, but that doesn’t exist so we head to Paragon instead. Hey, what ever happened to that Arts Center?
So say goodbye to Suan Lum Night Bazaar—no points for guessing what will likely rise up in its place.
We love our iPods and our PDAs, but it’s terrifying how much of what is important to us is now contained in little chips, SIM cards and servers, sometimes by people who don’t have a clue how to keep that information secure (us included). Identity theft scares the crap out of us. Phishing, email viruses and the sheer amount of junk email in our mailboxes every Monday morning is pretty damn frightening, too. And don’t even get us started on what holding mobile phones to our heads 24/7 is doing to us.
Trying to get some is not just hard: It’s scary. Because the thought of eating alone, sleeping along, having sex alone (webcams don’t count), growing old and dying alone drives us to do some seriously scary things:
Blind dates: Too busy to find a mate on your own? Better be brave.
Posting our measurements, photos and innermost thoughts on the Internet for all the world to see.
One-night stands: Through your beer goggles she looked pretty sexy. And her voice seemed a lot higher. Damn you, hormones!
And then there are scary people:
Men who have read The Game: Who knows how many guys have taken this supposedly true story about life as a pick-up artist as a bible instead of the anthropological study/voyeuristic pop pulp non-fiction that it is. Seduction as a foolproof science with which they’re able to lead someone to bed with just a few well-rehearsed lines? That’s a bit disturbing.
Women who have read The Game: Equally scary—they already know where all your lame mind games are headed.
Natural beauty? Love it. Inner beauty? Fantastic. Synthetic beauty? In the wrong hands, scary. Some of the badly nipped and tucked and botoxed faces you see on the social pages of Tatler give us nightmares. As do those of Michael Jackson-inspired luk thung singers. And sometimes we’re afraid for them, like Tata and her breasts. See #5, below.
Our obsession with beauty scares us, as do some of the popular conceptions of beauty. Just look at all the waiflike young people chillin’ around Siam Square. Diet pills—scary. Stuff that makes you shit all the nutrients out of your body—yuck. And what’s with this obsession with white skin? Whitening products are terrifying.
Cops: Even when we haven’t done anything wrong, when we drive past a cop on the street we get goosebumps every time. With roadblocks, it’s goosebumps on goosebumps.
Oops: You’re hungover, your hairdresser is hungover, neither of you has had coffee. S/he’s chopping away and suddenly you hear, “Ooops!”
Holes: Holes in sidewalks are dangerous, for sure, but what scares us more is what crawls out of them. Same thing for those holes in the stalls in public restrooms.
Really expensive cars or really cheap cars: You’re at a crosswalk. You’re safe with that Honda. That Toyota, too. But that black widebody BMW barreling towards you? Don’t even test him with one toe on the crosswalk, because he … will … not … stop. In fact, he’ll speed up. The same goes for that punk driving the beat-up old pickup delivery truck. Get the hell out of his way.
Clueless taxi drivers: There seems to be more and more of them every day.
Don’t get us wrong here: Teaching is a noble profession, perhaps the noblest, next to being a lifestyle journalist. As a whole, educators are underpaid, overworked and underappreciated. But that doesn’t mean they can’t scare us. Even competent teachers can be scary—and do you know what it is about them that scares us most? Their damn enthusiasm. Think about it: Would you want to meet Ajarn Yingsak, Khru Lily or Andrew Biggs in a dark alley when your homework wasn’t finished?
And then there are those in a completely different category who seriously scare us, freaks like John Mark Karr, obviously, but in a more general way foreigners who come here and get teaching jobs even though they couldn’t write an essay to save their lives. They’re not all incompetent misfits without teaching skills let alone social skills who put their own interests above those of our children, but what scares us is that there are a disproportionate number of them out there.
Still, you know what scares us most of all? Not them as much as us for being so shallow and so easily impressed by foreign skin.
Actor/politician/boxer-turned-singers: Many celebrities don’t know when to stop. Tao Somchai, Sorn Ram, Mam Kat, Paris Hilton—this means you!
Lookalikes: Striped Ts, tight jeans and dirty Converse—show how “indie” you are by looking like everyone else!
Tiny sex symbols: Moms, dads, quit scaring us by dressing up your little kids to look like their slutty pop idols.
It’s certainly easier to distract everyone with talk of our society’s moral decay and supposed remedies—early closing times, advertising restrictions, censorship—instead of going after, say, corruption. What scares us is that a few zealots are having success imposing their morality on the rest of us.
The least traveled president of the United States in recent history is now in office with a foreign policy that many consider more than a little scary. Having somebody like George W. Bush in command of one of the world’s most powerful military machines, and at the same time, having Kim Jong Il testing nuclear arms in North Korea in direct defiance of U.N. sanctions and U.S. threats is a recipe fraught with danger for every living thing on the planet.
A bit closer to home is the violence in the South that has been flaring unabated for years now. As more and more people are killed, regardless of their age, sex, or religion, one has to wonder how a resolution can be found. Thai people have a reputation the world over as being some of the most peace-loving on the planet—if we can’t stop killing each other, is there hope for anyone else?
And tell us you aren’t scared that a bunch of these dinosaur politicians will somehow manage to slip into the power vacuum and take over like the old days. We’re not saying that Banharn and Chavalit are evil—but they still scare us. So do Sanoh and Sanan. And Vatana and Chalerm.
Nothing makes us realize how small and powerless we really are on this planet more than Mother Nature. Tsunamis, floods, draughts, typhoons—one little twitch on her part and hundreds or thousands of lives are lost. And recent reports are indicating things are getting worse. The number of category four and five hurricanes has doubled in the last 30 years. Typhoons are for the first time being seen in the Southern Hemisphere since the planet was formed. It’s all in An Inconvenient Truth. And in the newspapers.
Nothing is scarier than not knowing what we are really capable of…until we do it and surprise even ourselves. How many times have you gotten home from impulse shopping and thought, “Wait a second, how much money did I just pay for this completely useless thing?”
Everyone knows what it’s like to spend a day in the office completely useless because you had a long night. And yet why do we continue to go out and drink with our friends on weeknights? Because it’s fun … right?
And then going home and drunk dialing.
Especially when they come on at closing time and you see what people really look like.
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How do you feel about the plight of the Karen?
Having been up there once, I was humbled by their dignity and generosity in the face of adversity.
Why do you have such a passion for Thai cuisine?
Because it is such a wonderful cuisine, one of the best in the world.
Of all the dishes you serve in your restaurant, which one best represents what you do?
I think the nam priks and lons are among the most interesting. It’s quite satisfying to see Westerners digging into the most typical of Thai dishes and enjoying them.
What’s your latest dish?
I’ve been playing around with a nice nam prik of boiled prawns and Asian citron served with lots of white turmeric, plaa fu and cha-om omelette. I have also been toying with a lemongrass salad, which I first had in Singburi.
How does your experience in Australia affect your cooking?
Well, I suppose it has made me more open minded—or should I say I have a more open palate?
How do you respond when people say a farang can’t make authentic Thai food?
I can completely understand. After all, who would expect a farang to begin to appreciate the delicious complexity of Thai cooking. I hope, however, to change their minds once they have eaten some of my food.
What’s your favorite Thai dish made by someone else?
Tom yam hua plaa chorn made by Paa Daeng in her small street stall in the Dusit area. Grilled sai grop in a market in Ubon Rachathani and grilled plaa chorn in Singburi.
What’s the one utensil you can’t do without?
Pestle and mortar.
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Worst gig: I tend to forget those.
Musical style: The whole spectrum of drum‘n’bass.
Day job: Proud parent.
In my music player at the moment: Charles Mingus presents Charles Mingus.
All time favorite albums: Kind of Blue by Miles Davis & John Coltrane, Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana, Bulletproof by Radiohead, Timeless and the first album by Sam Prekop.
Fail-safe crowd pleaser: “Inner City Life.”
Favorite accessory for DJing: My headphones.
On my MC Lowqui: Wicked MC and a great laugh.
On the essence of drum‘n’bass: One of the most beautiful things that I’ve ever known is something that Da Vinci once said: “Sculpture exists in the rock. You just have to blow away the dirt and the dust.” That’s what you have to understand with this style of music, that’s part of the whole journey.
Favorite type of punter: The new ones who love d‘n’b for the first time.
In my pocket: My iPod.
Groupie story: Better keep them close to heart.
In 20 years: I’ll still be making music, hopefully on an island.
Holler at this legendary DJ here when he plays in Bangkok on Oct 13. At Astra.
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In your pocket: Car keys
Never leave home without: Contact lenses
Favorite Bangkok sound: Birds and squirrels over the hedge
As a child: A nerd in school, an entertainer at home
On the Bangkok music scene: Western influence written all over it
All time fave song: “Desafinado”
Fave restaurant: Infiniti, Sheraton Pattaya
Last lie: Saying “not much” when asked “what’s up?”
Rule for life: Karma rules
First Job: A writer for Bangkok Post
Happiest moment: Watching Mr. Bean or Benny Hill DVD
Question to ask yourself: Why am I here?
Idol: Definitely not American Idol
Reading: “Life on The Other Side” by Sylvia Brown
DJ Varin can be heard playing Saturdays 1-4pm on FM 98.75, the Sawasdee India Show.
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Faster, better and more convenient. Not just a normal wireless mouse, Apple’s Mighty Mouse is ultra user-friendly. You can program it to use only the right or left button, or both, making it friendly to left and right-handed users. It also has an advanced power management system that automatically goes into energy-saving mode when you are not using it. But before going to the shop, be sure that your Mac has Bluetooth technology. B3,300. Available at Apple Stores (Try Apple Centre, Rm. 315, 3/F, Siam Paragon, 991/1 Rama1 Rd., 02-610-9000).
Go beyond your old limits. The first Sony Digital SLR in Thailand, α100 (Alpha 100), eliminates a lot of annoying camera problems for good. The most outstanding thing about the Alpha 100 could be its Super SteadyShot, which eliminates blurring by stabilizing the shot. Moreover, it creates its own unique look with Eye-Start AF System, which will automatically focus on the object when you look through the viewfinder. With a standard lens and 1GB memory stick, the unit comes at B40,990. See it for yourself at Sony Universe and Sony Style shops. (Try Sony Universe Silom, G/F, 323 United Center Bldg., Silom Rd., 02-630-4771/-2).
Bored of auto focus mode? Turn simple snap shots into better quality pictures with Digimax L85 from Samsung. Providing lots of manual features, unlike some digital cameras, it allows you to adjust aperture priority and shutter priority manually. Moreover, it has auto exposure bracketing, which will enables you to shoot a series of pictures with different exposures. With a v512MB SD memory card it sells for B17,990. Grab it now at leading stores. (Try Powerbuy, 5/F, Central Chidlom, 1027 Ploenchit Rd., 02-655-7655/-6).
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In your pocket: Lucky stones.
Stupidest artist stereotype: That you have to be poor and crazy to be an artist. I don't think you have to be poor at all!
In 20 years: I want to be healthy so I can continue to work with bigger installations and canvases.
Happiest moment: Right now!
Idol: Rauschenberg, my favorite installation artist and painter. He's dyslexic like me.
Favorite Bangkok art scene: Living in Bangkok is like living in one big art gallery. I get a lot of my inspiration from the city.
Rule for life: Never procrastinate!
(Would like to be) Remembered as: An artist, wife and mother.
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Bored with tuneless singers in live music bars? Looking for a place where you can take center stage? Bangkok’s full of karaoke bars that leave the tuneless singing to you and your friends. Here are just a few.
Lousy location, except for office workers in the area. 1/F, Kian Gwan Bldg., Wireless Rd., 02-627-3071/-5. Open daily 11am-1am.
Bangkok’s most modern and stylish karaoke venue. 3/F, Olympia Thai Tower, Ratchadapisek Rd., 02-513-4774. Open daily 6pm-1am. www.iplusrooom.com
Busy with office workers who know enough to book in advance. Narathiwat Rd., 02-675-4224. Open daily 6pm-1am.
Three private KTV rooms, an airier alfresco area and an extended dance floor. 44/4 Cheua Plerng Rd., under Rama 4 Expressway, 02-249-0222. Open daily 6pm-1am.
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Cheap food doesn’t always mean cheap taste. If you’re on the lookout for a place that will make your stomach full yet keep your pocket loaded, we can help. Bangkok is full of inexpensive and delicious food places—as long as you don’t judge a book by its cover. Bon appetit!
Where: 188 Krasi Rd., Banglumpoo, 02-281-2298, 02-281-2393. Open daily 9am-6:30pm.
What: Tubtim krob, water chestnut coated with red jelly served with ice and in coconut milk.
Why: Tub Tim Krob Siam excels in—surprise—tubtim krob. Around for almost 30 years, this shophouse’s signature ingredient is macapuno, or mutant coconut, boasting softer-than-average meat.
Price: B20 for tubtim krob and B25 for macupuno in coconut milk.
Where: Tanee Rd., Banglumpoo, 02-282-6378. Open daily 8am-5pm.
What: Muslim food
Why: Don’t blink or you’ll miss this hole-in-the-wall eatery. From the outside, it looks like a small noodle stall, but inside, you’ll find tantalizing Muslim dishes. This one-stop shop offers everything from khao mok kai (biryani rice) to mataba. Don’t miss the beef satay and oxtail soup.
Price: B50 for oxtail soup, B35 for khao mok kai.
Where: A small soi beside Tang Hua Seng Department Store, opposite Chakrapong Mosque, Chakrapong Rd. Open daily 10am-7pm.
What: Kanom jeen with various curries from naamya to naamya pah to green curry.
Why: Although it’s in a small and grubby soi, the food, tables, chairs and vendor are very clean. The curries are spicy and yummy, made fresh every day.
Price: B15 for kanom jeen with curry. B5 for a boiled egg. Free fresh vegetables.
Where: 229 Rambutri Rd., Banglumpoo, 02-282-2320. Open daily 7am-8pm.
What: Rice and side dishes like fried shrimp, curries and fried vegetables.
Why: Every side dish uses meaty ingredients just like in fine Thai restaurants, only cheaper. Their signature dishes are green curry and masaman kai.
Price: B20 for rice and one side dish. B25-70 for rice and two side dishes.
Where: 86 Chakrapong Rd., Banglumpoo, 02-282-9948. Open daily 10am-midnight.
What: Israeli and Thai food
Why: You can have good Israeli food without having to wander the dark sois of Nana. Also, prices are cheaper than in Nana and the taste is pretty much the same, except lighter.
Price: B30 for falafel (5 pieces), hummus and hasilim. A combination dish with your choices of hummus, hasilim, fried chicken, salad, mashed potato etc. is less than B100.
Where: Tanow Rd., Banglumpoo, across Soi Bavornrangsri. Open daily 8am-1pm.
What: Fresh baked bread and Thai desserts
Why: Roti Boy fever doesn’t compare to the lineup for Pornchai’s stuffed bread. Try raisin bread and mixed stuffing bread (sausage, mooyong, ham and raisin). If you hate lines, you can buy it at bakeries around Thewet and Victory Monument for an extra B5.
Price: B30 for all stuffed bread.
Where: 207/3/4 Phaya Thai Rd., near Net Design Siam Square, opposite MBK, 01-403-0505. Open daily 11am-8pm.
What: Japanese food like ramen, steak and curry rice.
Why: Air-conditioned but cheap. A good place to rest after spending all your money shopping. Their fish tempura ramen is superb.
Price: B35-B45, fish tempura ramen for B35.
Where: 432/1-2 Rama 1 Rd., 02-251-4689. Open daily 10am-10pm.
What: Thai food.
Why: Cheap food, good taste. But don’t expect any service-minded waiters. They can barely remember what you ordered.
Price: B40-B100.
Where: Food Court, G/F, Siam Paragon, 991/1 Rama 1 Rd., 02-610-9000. Open daily 10am-11pm.
What: Thai food.
Why: Amazing healthy khai jeaw with a vegetable stuffing. Its delicious kang tai pla is also recommended. Compared to the other shops at Paragon, the food is very cheap.
Price: B40 for one side dish and rice or B50 for two.
Where: Canteen, Faculty of Political Sciences, Chulalongkorn University. Open Mon-Fri 7:30am-2pm.
What: Old-style noodles.
Why: Try one dish and you will want to come back again for sure. The nice girls walking around are another good reason to drop by. Be prepared to wait.
Price: B20-B45.
Where: 77 Samyan Market, Soi Chula 15, 02-219-2119, 09-922-5903. Open daily 9am-8pm.
What: Thai food and bakery.
Why: The food is so-so, but its tasty chocolate cake is reasonably priced. However, we really mean it when we say the portions are small.
Price: B65 for one small foil box of its signature chocolate or orange cake. B25 per piece.
Where: 2/F, Samyan Market, 02-611-7976. Open daily 11am-midnight.
What: Steak and Thai food.
Why: A hearty plate of steak at a reasonable price is what Mokethip is known for, but the best-selling item is Chicken Alaska, a combination of fried chicken and spaghetti. If you want to try a bit of everything, there’s Hot Mix Grilled, which includes bacon, ham, sausages, pork chop and beef steak.
Price: Starts from B35 for Thai dishes and B70 for steak.
Where: Next to Assumption College, opposite Soi Chareon Krung 45.
What: Kuay tiew krae.
Why: The soup might be a little sweet for some—if you want to go for the spicier option, ask for yum. Many well-known people are regular customers here and rumor has it even some blue blood families have visited. To soothe your tummy while you’re waiting, have some spring rolls, sold at the beginning of the soi.
Price: B25 for noodles and B20-40 for spring roll.
Where: 85 Silom Soi 20, Opposite Wat Kaek market, 01-490-0726. Open daily 6am-6pm.
What: Kuay chop (meaty stew).
Why: This kuay chop shop is known in the area because of its delicious taste and sumptuous aroma. It offers a great variety of meat options, so carnivores really get a selection. The most popular choices are egg, tofu, liver, pig’s tongue and pig’s stomach.
Price: B25 for a bowl, B30 for a big bowl
Where: Sukhumvit Soi 38, under BTS Thonglor Station, opposite Soi Thonglor. Open Tue-Sun 7pm-very late.
What: Plenty of choices from bamee (egg noodles) to khao neaw mamuang (sticky rice with mango).
Why: Must-haves include bamee phuu (egg noodles with crab) and khao neaw mamuang. The bamee features real crab meat, sweet and tender roasted pork and al dente noodles. The soup here is sweetened by long-time stewing—not palm sugar like at other bamee trolleys.
Price: Bamee for B30-50. Khao neaw mamuang for B60-80.
Where: 94/13 Sukhumvit Soi 23, 02-260-1626. Open daily 10am-10pm.
What: Spicy Thai-style noodles.
Why: This air-conditioned noodle place features soup so deliciously rich that people always drain the bowl. One order is quite small so you may need to ask for two. Also offers homemade ice cream and is always busy during lunchtime.
Price: B25-30 for normal dishes and B65-75 for noodles with Thai-French beef.
Where: Sukhumvit Rd., about 60 feet after Thonglor, 02-391-2021.
What: Classic Thai dishes from tom yum goong (spicy prawn soup) to kai tod met mamuang (chicken with cashew nuts).
Why: It can be very noisy sitting on the street, so take a seat inside the no-frills restaurant and enjoy. These guys do it right.
Price: Main dishes range from B50-120.
Where: 3079/25, Piyarom Sport Club, Sukhumvit Rd., before Sukhumvit Soi 101/1. 02-741-8612. Open daily 10am-9pm.
What: Famous for yen ta fo and one-dish meals created by nationally well-known cook Archan Mallika.
Why: Yen ta fo features three different levels of spice: ros jeb (spiciest), jai soa (medium spicy) and dek dek (mild). Or go for kuay tiew tom yum jing jing, untouched by prik pon but redolent with lemongrass, kaffir lime leaf and shallot. The deep-fried Bhutan mushrooms are a crispy and tasty appetizer. The cha rang chut (Babbler’s bill tea) may keep you from getting drunk easily and cures hangovers.
Price: B55-80, B20 for tea.
Where: 10/3 Sukhumvit Soi 26, 02-258-6746. Open daily 9am-4:30pm.
What: Kuay tiew tom yum, kuay tiew krae.
Why: The tom yum noodles with real lime juice are this place’s specialty. Noodles come already seasoned, with your choice of a variety of toppings such as minced pork. A must-have with your tom yum noodles is deep-fried fish skin—they use real salmon.
Price: B30-40, deep-fried salmon skin B15-30.
Where: Suan Luang, Pathumwan Soi 5, across from the car park, 01-886-8739. Open Thu-Tue 4:30-10pm.
What: Fish maw soup.
Why: This small stall run by two aunties has only one staple, fish maw soup, but has been in business for over 20 years. One of their recipes for success is real fish maw instead of low-quality pig skin, and they pay B1,500 per kilo for the real thing.
Price: B60-70.
Where: Soi Ngam Duplee between Pinnacle hotel and alleyway. Open 10:30am-10:30pm.
What: Chinese dumplings.
Why: This tiny place has a variety of excellent dumplings, some great Chinese/Thai dishes, and very friendly service. Also try their fried eggplant(B70)—which comes out looking (and tasting) like French fries.
Price: B50 per plate of dumplings.
Where: 356/59 Samsen Rd., Thewet, 02-281-1315. Open daily 9:30am-7:30pm.
What: Chiffon cake.
Why: Living up to its name, Chiffon Bakery offers airy chiffon cake. Though there are many stalls selling this delicacy, this is the only place you’ll find it fresh from the oven. Great with a cup of coffee.
Price: B7/piece.
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When a joke fails: Sweat
Stupidest trend: Trousers
Scared of: My mum
Favorite audience: Drunk, dinner suits and party blowers
As a child you wanted to be: A priest. Then I realized it was just the “stage” and the microphone
In 20 years: I still won’t have untangled my iPod headphones.
On a night out: I'm the first to leave and stay sober
Last lie: See above
Rule for life: “Just one more...go on!”
First job: Let you know when it happens
Idol: My mum
Reading: Playboy
Favorite sound: Own voice
(Would like to be) Remembered as: The bloke who was the MC.
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