Pop quiz: What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of 1995? The first Toy Story? Or perhaps (What’s the Story) Morning Glory? Maybe you get all misty-eyed about a certain revolutionary new Windows operating system, the founding of ebay or the invention of the DVD. Perhaps you still mourn the death of Dean Martin, Ginger Rogers or Eazy-E. Whatever your memory of it is, 1995 seems like an awfully long time ago.But you want to know something strange? Nothing’s changed since then. At least it seems that way.

To: All of You [mailto: [email protected]]From: Us, the maligned many, the frustrated hordeSent: Frequently, until you change your waysSubject: The New Rules of EmailWe figure we should give you this heads up now, since it’s probably only a matter of time before all of Singapore is sharing the same office.

Hi everyone, it’s Tippy. Your favorite fashion correspondent. I want to chat to our new readers today. Yes, you soggy people who floated downriver, or maybe the lucky few who were carried 200 miles in the arms of a young soldier, your bare wet flesh pressed against his bare wet flesh. Ooh, sorry, goosebump moment! WE WELCOME YOU! Yes! Welcome to Bangkok! We are all really touched by what you’ve done for us, na ka, letting your huts flood and your wagons fill with mud so we could keep our Manolos dry. And we would really like you to FEEL AT HOME! JING JING!

When following the Prime Minister’s Twitter feed—or listening to her radio address—do you ever get that feeling that it’s never quite clear who’s really doing the talking?@PouYingluck: Won’t let my son use his four million baht to buy a Mini. Am an evil mother.@PouYingluck: Also holding him captive at the dinner table against his will, in breach of UN resolution.@ PouYingluck: Woops. Didn’t see the little bugger grab the phone. Ignore prev.

Dear LinkedIn,We the United Coalition of Petty-Minded, Gossip-Mongering Workers of Singapore wish to register our displeasure at your recent study which claims to have found that Singaporeans are among the world’s worst office gripers.For one thing, telling us we came second is adding insult to injury! Tell us how to come first and we promise to do as we’re told.

Has the novelty of F1 finally worn off? With the race coming only days after scientists announced they may have found particles travelling faster than the speed of light, throwing our understanding of the entire universe into question, Sebastian Vettel’s 300km/hour begins to sound a little tame. The papers tried their hardest to stoke interest, but when you’re reduced to talking about the number of extra hotel beds filled over the weekend, there’s a tendency for your readers to…well…fall asleep.

In a week that saw not one, not two, but three grand openings (Avalon, Louis Vuitton and Pangaea, just in case you’ve been living on Mars or in Bishan for the last month), nothing captured the popular imagination quite like trying to guess which celebrity was going to show up at which event and sprinkle their stardust on proceedings.

A sideways look at the films currently on general release that we think might secretly be about Singapore.Bad Teacher—Trouble ensues when a classroom assistant goes rogue and lets some fun into school.

Hi peeps—it’s me, Pancake, your favorite dek intern. So like, OMG, hello? Is this really the best the new government can do? It has been raining non-stop for like forever—lame! Do they not care about Thai people at all? I’d like to get a new leather bag for my Sony NEX-C3 at Suan Rot Fai (I know a guy), but like no way I’m going in this weather. If I have to order it on Face and the color comes out all wrong, I won’t be happy, Yingluck.On TV, they said farmers are totally fed up with the rain, too. Well, OK, but why? Don’t you need rain to grow rice?