I grew up in the suburbs of Washington D.C. My mom was a housewife, my father a staffer for a US senator. I always thought I’d probably work for the government.
Washington was new for my parents. They were from Michigan, from relatively humble backgrounds. So they were excited about Washington, it was a big deal. On Sunday afternoons, we’d load in the car, go see the cherry blossoms and the Smithsonian. They were intensely proud to be there.
My family was very middle class, so you had summer jobs. I sold popcorn. I mowed lawns. I was a senate page. I loved being a tour guide at the Capitol. But on my first tour, I started out with 60 people and ended up with ten. You learn to assess people very quickly: “Who do I have today? And what’s their interest level?”
The friends I made in university are still my lifetime friends. None of them are in diplomacy or live overseas. They keep me grounded. One friend recently emailed me about a picture of me on a website:
“Never wear that dress again.”
The foreign service test is free and everyone can take it. You just have to be an American citizen over 21 years old. So I just went with some friends one Saturday morning and then we went to get a burger.
I passed without having thought it through. And my parents were unhappy because I am the only daughter, the eldest child. We didn’t have anyone in the family who had ever done that. It was quite shocking for them.
I was 25 when I was posted in Kingston. I loved the tropics and the weather. But the crime rate was very high. And you had to go to four shops to find what you were looking for, like milk. Sometimes you didn’t find it at all.
People say “culture shock” but it’s actually quite exciting. The hardest part is moments of significant ceremony, like a funeral. You don’t know: “What do I wear? Really, when do I show up?”
In Argentina, my husband and I were newlyweds and we were invited to lunch following a baptism. The invitation said “informal.” When the hostess opened the door in sparkling jewelry and a cocktail dress, we realized we didn’t ask the right question.
You can’t really train up on that. Everywhere around the world, there are different customs and traditions. When I was in the Philippines, which is a catholic country, I’m also catholic so that was easy. The current ambassador, who is not, told me, “I sure wish I knew a little bit more!”
I started to use social media when I was in the Philippines. Filipinos, like Thais, are super social media-friendly. I had friends using Facebook and then, when Twitter came along, I found it’s a fantastic way to talk and share with people, so I jumped on it too.
For me, social media has been fantastic. You have to be willing to not only share but to hear and listen. It allows me to connect with people and places that I may never have seen otherwise.
I’m a public figure and I have no problem with everyone knowing what I’m thinking, the teams I’m rooting for. It’s a great connector. I never leave Chiang Mai without grabbing coffee with friends I met on Twitter.
You have to enjoy hearing from people—good and bad. People have views; it’s nice to hear them.
I try not to focus on extreme ends but I do hear from people who don’t like America, don’t like our policies, don’t like me as the face of America. It’s good to know people still have the freedom to criticize the United States. It’s one of the things we stand for.
I’m careful. I’m prudent. I don’t advertise where I’m going but I’ll live Tweet from where I am. But I do the same things everyone does: I go out jogging, shopping. I’m a normal person. I need to buy birthday presents and see friends.
I’m a little star-struck when I’m with, not only my own president, but also other global figures. I’m a bit tongue-tied. Seeing President Obama: pretty cool. I love to share that with other people. It’s an amazing experience.
It’s one of the beauties of being an ambassador. You get to offer your views and your thoughts. Now, there are a great many people in Washington who have the ability to say, “Thank you for your views, but this is what we’ll do.”
I know General Prayuth well. I think he's a very capable army officer. I and my government don't agree with his decision to have a military coup. We've expressed our views clearly, but he's aware of that as well.
Wikileaks didn’t change the fact that people still want to engage with us, engage with America. People who are sophisticated about these things realize these cables represent only 10 percent of the conversations taking place.
I think that I’ve become much more global in my outlook, from the girl who’d barely traveled abroad to now someone who has lived on a couple of continents and speaks a few languages.
I’m most proud of the work we, as an embassy team, have done on global issues, which go beyond Thailand and America. Our health team has done work on HIV/AIDS, dengue, malaria, and we’ve expanded to support Myanmar’s fledgling health industry. I’m also proud of the work that we’ve done on diversity issues: handicapped people, LGBT.
I’m married to a fellow diplomat. I look at all the things we’ve done, the places we’ve been, how lucky we are. I stumbled into it, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Being far from Bill, from my family—my mother is elderly—that is the hardest part of my job, for sure.
Be open. You know the Nike slogan: just do it. Try. Some of my greatest experiences happened when I spread my wings a little.
