We sent the same questions to comedians Paul Ogata, Joanne Kam and Vivek Mahbubani, three of the five comic acts that will be performing live at the event Kings & Queen of Comedy 2, to find out who’s the wittiest of them all. You be the judge. By SC Chua

Originally from Hawaii, American comedian Paul Ogata, has been a regular stand up circuit, made numerous TV appearances and was crowned the winner of the prestigious TakeOut Comedy Competition in 2004.
THE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON I LEARNT AS A CHILD Fasten your safety belt! I fell out of a moving car when I was 9.
NEVER BELIEVE SOMEONE WHO SAYS They can pull their arm out of their socket.
MY BEST CHAT UP LINE “I bet you can’t do this with your arm.” And then I pull it out of its socket.
WHAT ANNOYS ME People who don’t know the difference between than and then, your and you’re, or too and to. On the other hand, I keep mixing up Dylan McDermott and Dermot Mulroney.
WHEN I’M NOT MAKING JOKES, I’M Travelling the planet to get to the next place where I will once again make jokes. And if there’s time, I will eat some ice cream as well.
I THINK I AM FUNNY BECAUSE I’ve sent two people to the hospital and caused several chairs to be broken. Either I’m funny or I’m a minor earthquake.
WOULD LIKE TO BE REMEMBERED AS Better than the best sex you’ve ever had.
IN 10 YEARS TIME, I WOULD MOST LIKELY BE 9 years older. (At some point I’ll find a temporal vortex that transports me a year ahead in time. It’s pretty much the worst form of time travel, since you can’t place bets on previous sporting events to which you already know the outcome. Also your bills will have piled up. So I’ll be younger than you, but don’t envy me.)

Regular headliner and host at The TakeOut Comedy Club Hong Kong, Vivek Mahbubani also find’s time to run his own design firm when he’s not doing stand up..
THE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON I LEARNT AS A CHILD Never, ever do an exam left-handed when you’re right-handed. The person marking won’t get the joke.
NEVER BELIEVE SOMEONE WHO SAYS “I have a joke you’ll love…”
MY BEST CHAT UP LINE Can I buy you a standard drink?
WHAT ANNOYS ME Waiting in line at the buffet and watching someone pick at food.
WHEN I’M NOT MAKING JOKES, I’M Web designing.
I THINK I AM FUNNY BECAUSE I get bored when life isn’t funny, but I’ve not been bored in a looonnggg time.
WOULD LIKE TO BE REMEMBERED AS The guy with the goatie (not the receding hairline).
IN 10 YEARS TIME, I WOULD MOST LIKELY BE Very, very bald but still very, very hairy.

Her acid tongue has earned Joanne Kam the nickname Diva Queen a reputation for being the most notoriously funny lady on the Malaysian comedy scene.
THE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON I LEARNT AS A CHILD Never let your mother enter you in fancy dress contest with your cuter younger 3-year-old sister because she will always win.
NEVER BELIEVE SOMEONE WHO SAYS I know everything.


MY BEST CHAT UP LINE: Just google me.
WHAT ANNOYS ME People who whine about their life.
WHEN I’M NOT MAKING JOKES, I’M Scheduling the rest of my life.
I THINK I AM FUNNY BECAUSE I tell you things you want to hear but you’re too afraid to say it yourself.
WOULD LIKE TO BE REMEMBERED AS The Wonder Woman of comedy – I already have the costume.
IN 10 YEARS TIME, I WOULD MOST LIKELY BE Still working and making people laugh but hopefully with a small empire of my own.


Catch Kings & Queen of Comedy Asia 2 18th November and 19th November 2011, at Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre. Tickets available at www.ticketpro.com.my or www.airasiaredtix.com.

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