The last time we watched a Tarsem film, it was back in 2000 with The Cell, a J. Lo helmed fantasy-thriller that was curiously stylish, but lacking any real thrills. The same can almost be said of Immortals, a 300-wannabe with stylized gore and eye-popping special effects, set and costume designs, which looks more like a sexy computer game more than a real film, although a reasonably entertaining one.
Hunky Henry Cavill (the next Superman) is Theseus, a noble and heroic villager who must courageously rise up against evil Hyperion (Mickey Rourke), who threatens to destroy all mankind after he finds the lost and mythical Epirus Bow. After Hyperion kills his mother and makes a slave out of him, he befriends thief Stavros (Stephen Dorff) and virginal oracle Phaedra (Freida Pinto), and the three, along with a few good men, must make sure that Hyperion does not get his way. Cue an outlandish battle to the finish.
Part history, part mythology and mostly a spectacle of state of the art digital effects, Immortals is a would-be epic that lacks a convincing core. The plot is childishly straightforward and unlike 300’s gleeful sense of masochism, the film’s hero is a bore who draws his sword “to protect those he loves” and who seems awfully attached to his mother for such a supposed tough guy. It doesn’t help that Cavill has as much acting chops as Pinto, who literally sleepwalks through the film. Even Rourke is about is threatening as a fairy behind that mask he wears for more than half the time. Interestingly enough, it’s the film’s set and costume designs that are more appealing to look at. Tarsem’s visual style is undeniable, and the man has an eye for curious costumes (courtesy of Dracula’s award-winning Eiko Ishioka) and imaginative set designs which give the film an otherworldly tone. Too bad that the film’s heroes are an emaciated lot rather than the full-bodied characters they ought to have been.