Act 221. The Don’t Even Think About It Act.We hereby declare that it is illegal to think about it. Thinking about it will incur 15 year jail sentences and fines of at least five billion baht per thought.Art 221. a. One is thinking about it when one is not thinking about its exact opposite. To use the argument that one is not thinking about it just because one is not thinking about it is inadmissible in a court of law. Only thinking about not-it counts as not thinking about it. Otherwise, the court will assume you are thinking about it. Are you? See paragraph b.Art. 221. b. Not thinking about it is defined as a general fuzzy feeling of utter joy. If you are not feeling delirious, you’re probably thinking about it, and should turn yourself in to the nearest police station immediately.Art. 221. c. Discussing or thinking about this law, or thinking about thinking about this law, also counts as thinking about it. Even saying the law is nice, and you like it, is only acceptable if you are an editor at The Nation. If you are a politician, see paragraph d.Art. 221. d. Politicians will receive a double sentence for breaking Act 221. Also, in the case of politicians, the law extends to thinking about anything—which shouldn’t be difficult for Newin and Jatuporn.Art. 221. e. Musing counts as thinking. As do pondering and reflecting. The same penalties apply to all existing forms of thinking or any forms to be invented in the future.Art. 221. f. The burden of proving non-thought lies with the defendant. Alibis such as watching Channel 3 soaps or being in the midst of a BB chat about Golf Pichaya’s reconciliation with his mom are examples of admissible proof that one is definitely not thinking.Art. 221. g. Here are some examples of things that do count as thinking about it: watching Youtube clips that don’t include penguins, cats or Justin Bieber, eating Thai food cooked by foreigners, comparing Thailand to Burma, saying Prince William is going bald.Art. 221. h. If you’ve read this law in its entirety, you’re clearly thinking too much. Please send your name, age and phone number to [email protected]: men on motorcycles should appear on your soi shortly.