As the days grow shorter, the nights darker and the air ever colder (or not; we’re romanticizing here), our collective thoughts naturally turn to one thing. Depending on your faith, how you celebrate this great tradition may take different forms. Depending on your age, you may have grown to question the meaning behind it all. You and your neighbor may even look to different texts, sacred scrolls or even magazines to guide you through it. For all of us though, this is a time when hope (that Vera Wang dress you so badly want), sacrifice (not eating out for a month to save up for it) and manifest destiny (“told you it’d look great on me”) come together in an annual celebration of our one true salvation: Shopping.

And whatever your creed, there’s no denying God would be that teeny bit Greater if only He would make our Christmas gift buying a little easier. (It must be a He; no female deity would stand for such nonsense. Presumably it’s a straight He, too.) So we offer a plea to the Almighty: Dear Lord, please make it more convenient for us here in Singapore to take advantage of next week’s Black Friday discount shopping deals, for now and evermore. While You’re at it, access to the following week’s Cyber Monday promos would also really help.