On the sidelines of the recent Asia Europe Meeting in Finland, our Hilarious Caretaker reportedly joked to Junichiro Koizumi that he would like to form an “Enjoy Your Life Party,” and nominate the outgoing Japanese prime minister to be the group’s leader. Details are sketchy, but political and business analysts believe the party’s main platform will be to push for the enactment of laws granting complete amnesty to its members—specifically in the case of lawsuits related to human rights abuses, corruption and perjury. The party will also set up a committee of academics who will screen textbooks for negative accounts of party members and re-write them when necessary. (Photo retouching will be available for an extra charge.) Privileges will be based on the Thailand Elite card, offering former government leaders and CEOs special discounts on shopping, invitations to exclusive golfing/hunting outings, and fast-track immigration service to tax havens. Interested? Fill out the form below and email it to [email protected]; you must include a full-body color photograph.