The PAD is really pissed with the New Politics Party, threatening to pull its support, or even simply disintegrate mid-air, like old farts do. Newin and Silpa-archa are super tight again. And the Pracha Santi Party is back from the dead. Despite the smoke and mirrors, these parties only serve the interests of the men behind them, which is about as narrow a focus as focus gets. So we’ve come up with our own single-issue, corruption-rife parties for the upcoming elections:The Party for Covering Bangkok in SkywalksGovernor Sukhumband says 68% of Bangkokians support the skywalk. Well, BK conducted an online poll and 57% of voters said, “We need better sidewalks, not skywalks” while only 18% voted for the skywalk. Who you gonna trust? Vote for our party and we promise you’ll get to ride the skywalks absolutely free during a one-month trial period.The Party for Buying the Military More ToysThe Navy just got permission from the PM to blow B7.7 billion on some 30-year-old German U-boats. Finally, we can torpedo Rohingya rafts without being spotted by pesky eye-witnesses. Vote for our party and we’ll let your kids climb on the submarines once a year, on Children’s Day.The Party for Buying Rich Kids Driving LessonsAnother week, another rich teen causing a gruesome death with an expensive car. This time, the police said compensation for the Lao girl killed by the 19-year-old Rangsit student driving a 4.5 million baht Porsche Cayman could be as much as B200,000. Ouch. Vote for us and we’ll broadcast a reality TV show where rich kids’ learn to drive, swerving through crowds of pedestrians at 120KPH. So much as a scratch on daddy’s Benz and they’re eliminated—yes, it’s time to get tough on their total disrespect for imported German craftsmanship.The Party for Fewer Earthquakes2,700 buildings in Bangkok are at risk of collapsing if an earthquake of a magnitude greater than five on the Richter scale were to hit Bangkok. In 2007, a new building code was passed but the Engineering Institute of Thailand says “No one knows exactly whether the buildings were equipped with earthquake resistant systems.” Vote for us and we promise to keep our fingers crossed and pray a lot.