You did not die in a car accident, from a water-borne disease or as a result of seeing too many topless ladyboys this Songkran. For this, we congratulate you. Furthermore, we hope your first week back at the office was as unpleasant as ours (TGIF, right?).Technically, Songkran marks a new year, meaning that four months after the farang-sanctioned drunk driving week, our own week of merrymaking signals that it is time to reset our mental calendars all over again and embark on some brand new resolutions. What we like about post-Songkran resolutions, though, is that they are made with the memory of January’s failed attempts fresh in our minds. Hence, they tend to be a little bit less uplifting, but a whole lot more realistic. Here we go:1. While we refuse to quit drinking, we promise to support the Think Before You Drink Campaign, the Make Sure One of Your Buddies Can Still Stand Before Driving Campaign, and the Vomit Repeatedly Before You Drive Campaign. (One of these campaigns is real, but you’d have to be pretty far gone to guess which one.)2. While we oppose an end to corruption on the grounds that this is how we got into university and it remains our preferred method to avoid prison on Saturday nights (see above), we hereby resolve to wholeheartedly grumble about this issue if prompted by angry expats.3. We will support efforts for more local food, but not to the point where all the food has to be local. So for example, while we love the idea of eating herbs grown in a restaurant’s garden, we’d still like to wash them down with Evian. Hey, we’re not beasts!4. We hereby promise to click “like” on the facebook page to protect the Apex Movie Theaters. Of course, we will continue to buy crappy B80 DVD screeners rather than pay B100 to watch them in a cinema that has no 4D or welcome drinks.5. Finally, we solemnly swear to spend a little less time in community malls. Luckily, online shopping seems to be going through a real boom. Ohmygod, have you seen the Painkiller t-shirts on Zalora.com?