LIBRA (Sep 23-Oct 22): “Everything is dreamed first,” wrote French poet Gilbert Trolliet. French philosopher Gaston Bachelard agreed, adding, “Creative reverie animates the nerves of the future.” Your task in the coming weeks, Libra, is to act on those clues: Conjure up pictures in your mind that foreshadow the life you want to be living next year. Proceed on the assumption that you now have extraordinary power to generate self-fulfilling prophecies.

TAURUS (Apr 20-May 20): The outsourcing of fortune telling is well underway. Psychics and astrologers from India have been showering me with email invitations to take advantage of their services. “By the grace of the towering flames of goodness that burn the roof of our temple,” said one, “we have pledged to slave away our lives to cause the happy encroachment of bubbling karma on your masterful head.

TAURUS (Apr 20-May 20): The outsourcing of fortune telling is well underway. Psychics and astrologers from India have been showering me with email invitations to take advantage of their services. “By the grace of the towering flames of goodness that burn the roof of our temple,” said one, “we have pledged to slave away our lives to cause the happy encroachment of bubbling karma on your masterful head.

TAURUS (Apr 20-May 20): It appears you’re cooperating (sort of) with an authority figure who’s using the carrot-and-stick routine on you. I suppose that could lead you at least part of the way to the promised land—especially if you really believe you can’t motivate yourself without the authority’s prodding. But if you plan to continue in this vein, Taurus, can I please convince you to ask for the biggest, freshest carrot and a beautifully decorated stick?

ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 19): On April 1, 1976, British astronomer Patrick Moore told his radio listeners that a rare configuration of Jupiter and Pluto was occurring. So dramatically would it affect Earth’s gravity, he said, that they might feel lighter than usual, and perhaps even be able to float up into the air. I’m wondering if we can expect a similar phenomena this week. There’s a rare grand trine in fire signs, with Jupiter in Sagittarius, Saturn in Leo, and the sun in Aries.

ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 19): Hundreds of years ago, the Native American tribe known as the Seneca had a rule of thumb about when to sow corn seed. You had to wait until the weather was warm enough to lie naked in the dirt without discomfort. I believe a similar principle applies to your plans to start a certain new enterprise, Aries. Hold off on the launch until you’re able to take off all your clothes in a natural setting and stretch out on the ground without shivering.

PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20): “The fastest way to succeed is to look as if you’re playing by other people’s rules,” says novelist Michael Korda, “while quietly playing by your own.” That strategy works for many of the happiest people I know. It ain’t easy, though. You’ve got to figure out how to be honest and genuine even though you’re constantly performing; you’ve got to make your life a work of art that continually allows you to reinvent your innocent enjoyment of the game you’re playing. You Pisceans are probably better suited for this cagey approach than any other sign.

PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20): Molecular scientist Robert Bohannon knows a way to cram even more obscene gratification into a doughnut. He has discovered the secret to infusing pastries with a non-bitter version of caffeine. If his innovation is adopted by bakers, a doughnut would not only be able to have its usual sugary kick, but could also deliver the punch of two cups of coffee. Judging from the current astrological omens, Pisces, I’d say you’ll soon be able to find a healthy metaphorical equivalent to this pathological marvel for your own use.

PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20): Native to Africa and Australia, baobab trees are oddly beautiful, with thick, bulbous trunks that can grow partially hollow and thus serve as shelters for people and animals. They have an enormous capacity for storing water, allowing them to survive during draughts. Humans carve and paint their fruits, making them into ornaments, and also use their leaves, fruits, and bark for food and drink. The tree’s large white flowers open only at night, and are pollinated by bats. In all these ways, you remind me of a baobab right now, Pisces.

AQUARIUS (Jan 20-Feb 18): Happy Valentine Daze, Aquarius! During this lover’s holiday, I’m praying for you to have mind-boggling communions with smart-mouthed, quick-thinking virtuosos who are at least as brilliant as you. To be frank, I don’t care whether or not these communions are with attractive members of your favorite gender. In accordance with the promises of your current astrological omens, I just want to see you stimulated to the point of spiritual and intellectual rapture by kaleidoscopic give-and-take sessions.