So did you hear the one about the finance minister who goes to a massage parlor? He tells the girl it will only take a minute. After it’s over, 60 seconds later, the masseuse looks disappointed and confused. “What? I told you it would only take a minute,” says the minister. “Exactly,” says the girl. “It’s just I didn’t think there was such a thing as an honest politician.”

Shit. That’s not it. She says, “Wow, you must be a democrat.” No, damn, that’s not it either. The girl says, “Market confidence is a bit like nuclear deterrence. If you admit to lying as a way to preserve confidence, you destroy the very confidence you’re trying to build.” Hmm… Somehow it was funnier when we read it on Facebook. Oh wait, yeah, that’s right: The girl is Korn. And the guy is a dentist, not a minister. Let’s try that again.

So the dentist goes to a massage parlor and asks for Korn. (Yeah, of course, Korn doesn’t work in a massage parlor. He’s our former finance minister, but it’s a joke. Bear with us.) So the dentist says, “Don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing.” And when it’s over Korn goes, “It’s the first time I have met an honest dentist. That is a very important quality to have in a good finance minister, too. In fact, before I ended up here, I used to be finance minister, and I never lied. Not even a little white lie. And look where it got me. Now I have this great job taking it up the…” No wait, that’s not right. Not right at all. Our apologies, Mr. Korn.

OK, we remember the joke now: “How can you tell if a politician is lying? Their lips are moving.” Yeah, that’s it. Not very funny, right? See, that’s the thing with a politician saying he’s lying: it’s like a hooker saying she gives head for money. It’s just not a very good joke. Damn you, Mr. Kittirat. You ruined Page 3 for everyone this week.